Is this PND or just normal?

[SteggySaurus]

My DS is nearly four months and up until a few weeks ago I had no problems. I've started to feel really down and insecure about how I look. I've told OH and he's just said that I'm being silly and is constantly telling me I look nice and trying to do things to make me feel better about myself but it doesn't help.

I just feel like crap when I look in a mirror and sometimes I get really upset and cry about it. My OH is the more attractive one out of the two of us, and even though I trust him, I worry that he's not going to stay with me when he could get someone better. It doesn't help that he works with mainly women who all seem to be stunning! We went to a work thing and someone who has a baby the same age as ours has her figure back and just looks amazing. When I said this to him he agreed that she looked great but then said that he thought I did too and that I shouldn't compare myself to others. When I said I worried about him finding someone else he laughed and said that he loves me for more than just how I look and that to him I'm the most beautiful woman.

I got really upset the other night and he suggested that I go to the doctors as it could be a sign of post natal depression but I'm not sure. Am I just feeling a bit rubbish for now but things will get better? Or is it a sign that I need extra support from somewhere.

[HaleMary]

I don't think it sounds like PND exactly (or not how mine manifested itself, or that of anyone I know), but it certainly sounds like more than ordinary post-baby body insecurities, and that yes, you should talk to your GP, as it sounds like a a signal you may need help of some kind. I realise your husband means well, but dismissing your feelings of intense insecurity and unhappiness as 'silly' really isn't helpful - you feel what you feel, and it does sound as if it's a sign there's more going on.

[Roseybee10]

I think it's a fairly natural feeling after having a baby and your body changing so much. To the outside world I probably look like I have my figure back but everything is saggy, droopy and wrinkled and I look awful without clothes on. This other woman you saw may have just as many body Hang ups as you even though you think she looks great. Someone else might look at you and think you look amazing for having just had a baby.

My husband is the same and dismissed my insecurities because he doesn't think they're valid. It doesn't help.

For what it's worth it doesn't sound like pnd but it does sound like you're feeling rubbish. What is it in particular that's getting you down?

Maybe a pamper session or new haircut and some new clothes might make you feel a bit more 'you' again x

[olympicsrock]

I felt like this about my body after having a baby. It is quite a brutal transition . I looked at other professional women with flat stomachs. What helped in the short term was buying some comfortable light support underwear. I spent about 150 pounds buying knickers and even a couple of control slips to double up on the occasions I wanted to look good.it made a difference and helped me feel better. I also did lots of walking which helped to shape up and clear my head.