school-age children plus newborn - how do you get out of the house for school?

[dinny]

dd2 is 2 weeks old, my mum has just left and dh is back at work.... am so daunted, how the hell do you get to school on time? have two other children age 6 and 4...

also, how do you do bathtime, meals etc etc! seems impossible to fit it all in amongst bf-ing and nappies

thanks!

[dinny]

anyone show me the way forward?

[mckenzie]

can you ask a favour of another school mum for a few days a week? Or at least have someone on stand by for if things aren't going to plan. I think you will be surprised how the new baby will just fit in to the timetable that you already have. And you'll be amazed what you can do with the spare hand while you are using the other arm to support baby while breastfeeding . Or perhaps use a sling?

[traceybath]

Well what i did and will be doing again come september is to get the older ones good at getting themselves ready.

My 4 year old dresses himself, washes etc in the morning and also does his own breakfast (just cereal). I would eat breakfast with him and have fed baby in bed before getting up.

Would then have bath or shower with baby watching me from bouncy chair or having a nap in cot.

But we're a house of early risers - so would be up by 6.30am at the latest and leave at 8am.

I found i needed plenty of time and to do as much prep night before, eg laying out all clothes for the next day.

[MrsMattie]

With great difficulty...at first.

I have a 4 yr old DS at nursery attached to school - has to be in for 9am five mornings a week. Also have 16 wk old DD. Only really found my feet in the last couple of weeks in terms of morning and evening routines. It will come - and there may be some hairy moments at first! - but try not to be too hard on yourself. You have just had a baby and the school need to understand that.

Morning - the only way I can manage is with a very strict routine for my older child (ie. no monkeying about! Up, breakfast, wash, dress, out the door). I do nothing with DD other than feed her (if I can time it for just before we leave, all the better, but doesn't always work out). She gets bundled into a pramsuit still in last night's babygro and into the car/buggy we go. I sort her out (bath, clean clothes etc) when we're back home.

Evening - for the first 12 weeks-ish I didn't have a routine. I just did DS's dinner & bedtime routine of old with DD in my arms, in a moby wrap sling or in her car seat (could carry it around from room to room with me). There were some stressy moments when I just thought 'Oh, FFS, this is such a faff!', but it has eased up as the weeks have gone by. I'm managing to get DD down to sleep after dinner but befopre DS's bedtime, now, which is a relief.

It will come together. Two weeks post-birth is very early days.

[MrsMattie]

CONGRATS btw! xx

[traceybath]

oh and agree with mrsm - 2 weeks in is very early days indeed!

[PfftTheMagicDragon]

Get as much done as you can the night before. DS started school just before DD came along, it can be tricky and I hate being late. Everything ready.

I get any buggies/slings out and ready the night before, coats out, clothes and nappies all out ready to be used for the morning.
Cereal bowls out, dinner money ready, everything you need. Get your own clothes out. Get children dressed before going downstairs in the morning or it can feel like you are wading through mud.

I find having a tighter rein on things gets you ready quicker and helps you feel more in control.

[Sidge]

You get up very early, regardless of how tired you are and how little sleep you had.

You become incredibly organised and get everything ready the night before.

You have a military-precision timetable for everything that has to be done in the morning, eg 0712 DD1 woken up, 0715 DD1 in kitchen getting breakfast, 0730 DD1 washing face and brushing teeth, etc.

The poor baby just has to fit around everyone else. IMO it is important to get the older ones to school on time, even if it means taking the sleeping baby out in it's sleepsuit and feeding it in the car after you have dropped off the others.

Bathtime - throw em all in together. Mealtimes - bulk cook and freeze as much as possible, eg spag bol sauce which can then make lasagne, spag bol, chilli etc.

[mummymash]

I've just bought a book called 'Time Management for Manic Mums'! Although us busy mums hardly have time to read the thing, it has useful tips for cutting back on time wasting in routine chores, activities, etc. I have a busy 3yr old DD&6mnth old DD. I'm the mum who's running down the school drive at 10 past 9 every morning with my eldest still eating his breakfast!

[dinny]

oh, thanks you lot

yes, I do have people who can help out but I want to get it together and get sorted, iykwim

it doesn't help that bf-ing has been really painful this time and still have sore nipples on one side, so am a bit hampered atm

I think the trick is for me to get up early, isn't it (groan)

wish the custom of 40 days lying in was still happening!

[traceybath]

yeap - unfortunately even less sleep is the answer

hope you get less sore soon.

[BonsoirAnna]

Get a nanny?

[Thankyouandgoodnight]

Do what you did before baby was born but just drag baby along with you!

[dinny]

it has all been so easy up till now - my mum has been staying and it's been a doddle!

God, am rubbish at getting up early

[Flum]

Yeah had my 3rd 2 months into dd1s first term at school.

So my tips are: don't include baby in routine until at least to 8 weeks old. Then don't try to stick to it rigorously.

I usually feed baby and change his nappy about 6.30am then get up at 7 to make teas and choccy milks for me, DH, DD1 and DD2. We have drinks and a story in bed, then get dressed by 7.50am. Breakfast 8 to 8.30am. I don't usually wash up, jsut clear table.

Then lots of yelling about brushing teeth, hair, shoes, pack lunch, book bag etc. I bundle baby in pram still in his sleeping bag. This usually works well as he drops off on way to school at 8.45am and that is his morning nap.

The MAJOR tip is make sure baby is fed before you embark on activity with the older ones! When baby is tired just put straight into pram - he will get used to falling asleep on his own.

My 3rd is just the easiest sweetest little thing, so easy going. 4 months now and it is a doddle.

My DH works from home but I still do it all in the mornings - it is easier other wise he soes stuf in diff order or slows things up. He does often clear up breakfast things while I am out with the others which is quite sweet I think.

The first 6 weeks though he got the girls up for me and I took over at 8.30am -m it was SUCH luxury. I fed babe then had a leisurly shower.... no more though

[MrsMattie]

Dinny, if you are still sore and trying to establish comfy bf-ing, I think you should call back in the help! If at all possible, of course.

Otherwise, be strict about your morning routines/getting your older one to school, but as soon as your back home, back to bed/sofa and feeding - no tidying up and faffing in the house. Let it slide for a bit.

[Octothechildherder]

lay everything out ready for the morning

do baths once a week

make older two get dressed themselves

dh does breakfast

yell alot

[twinklytoes]

I'm 6mths in now with the same aged children. get everyone at school on time and can usually drag myself out of bed at 7.30am, having already done a 5am feed.

I found that the baby just had to tag along. if awake there was only time for nappy change and feed. ds regularly goes to school in his night clothes with a cardi and blankets; in the early days I just lifted him out of the cot / moses basket and straight into the pram.

my saving grace is that my 4yr old is on mornings at nursery so I can walk into the house just after 9am and deal with the bombsite and spend time sorting out baby.

[dinny]

MrsM, sadly can't call her back, worse luck, as she'd been here for 5 weeks (before due date)

one side is ok, boob wise, I just have to use that if out and about!

[twinklytoes]

in the evenings have found that I need to prepare dinner in the afternoon if I want to do full bedtime routine of bath, story etc.

bathtimes have reduced to every other day for the older ones. I found that I could get the older two in the bath and then sort baby bath and feed and settle into cot and then go back to the older two and get them out and sorted for bed. baby joins stories if not settled.

[Flum]

Yeah first few months will be really tricky but then will be ok.

[Thankyouandgoodnight]

Get stuff ready the night before and you can get out of bed and be out of the door in an hour. You won't get a coffee in that time though! Shower and feed baby first (unless slow feeder and do it in bits). Get everyone downstairs and eating/drinking and dressed with the pull of 5 mins of TV once done. Bananas are good stock breakfast that can be eaten on the run if needs be .

Bath 2-3 times per week max. Big ones in bath and washed. Put baby in bath and take out and dry and PJd and feed while older ones play. Then leave on bathroom floor on folded towel while dry and dress olders. Bingo done.

[Flum]

The hardest bit for me is breaking the golden time with the baby and forcing myself out of bed to make drinks and wake the others up as it is sooo quiet and peaceful and I have radio 4 on. When the other two are up there is a constant din.

[dinny]

I remember feeling like this when I went from 1-2

just have been coasting along with dd and ds lately, they have become quite easy really

can't imagine being same with 3, but suppose I will a few months down the line!

[dinny]

bath thing is interesting....not every night seems the consensus...