Help! anyone out there got 3 small ones? or advice on routines...

[Likeasow]

Had my third DD 3 months ago and feel like I am drowing - can't get anything done and although have the skills have lost the knowledge if that makes sense - had little trouble getting the previous 2 into a routine but with this Little One its all random and more night feeds and less sleep and less sanity for me. Its hard having 3 - love her to bits but 2 was manageable and this is is tricky......why can't I remember when they slept and ate? how many naps a day would be right? this one power naps......and book suggestions or website suggestions? it must be easy for me to follow as IQ is diminishing with sleep deprivation - I seem to lose my mind when the milk comes in also....

[thisisRialifebaby]

I had my DS3 6 months ago and know where you're coming from. Sadly I have no words of advice, just hang in there. DS3 power naps which is a PITA. I had 7 year gap between the first two, but only 3 years this time, so it's all different anyway as DS1 was pretty self-sufficient.

The best thing for me was being on a PN thread on here, other than that haven't read anything.

Things are improving a bit now we're on solids!

HTH.

[Likeasow]

all goes so fast too this time round too doesn't it? I have 3 years between the first two and then 2.4 between the 2nd and 3rd - 3 under 6 what was I thinking? (thought it might take longer to get pregnant)

[thisisRialifebaby]

It will come together, honest. 3 months isn't long to have got used to it. Keep smiling.

[pollypumpkin]

i had 3 DD under 3.5yrs at one point - youngest is now 7. Can't give advice but just sympathy... how old are your older 2?

[gigglewitch]

i would have posted the same this time last year likeasow... my dc are now 7 (well,his b/day tomorrow), 4 and just 2. in the last two or three weeks, and only just then, am i able to 'swim' again. DD (youngest) just decided by herself to toilet train herself at 21mo and i have to say that whilst nappies arent in themselves a big issue, there is a whole development thing about the stage she has got to now and doesn't need everything doing for her.
Routines in your house are of military scale - we have this huge bath-time at 6:30, 4yr old goes to bed at 7, so does 2yr old (both have stories in their own rooms) whilst 7yr old has stories a little later and we read books with chapters to him now.
I agree that two seemed perfectly manageable, though many of my friends felt that this was hard work...number three defo sunk me for two years. I've also had pnd (still on meds but now feeling much better) - how stressed are you feeling?

[gigglewitch]

that should be routines in our house

[sugar34plum]

my youngest 3 are 5.4 3.10 and 18 months. I have 6 kids so i completely understand where your coming from.

It does get better! It takes a long time to get into a routine thats suits. Try not to stress over it.

[MilaMae]

I had 3 under 16 months so understand totally. As others have said it does get better. Twins are 4 and dd is 3 and I still have days when I feel as if I'm drowning but it's far more manageable now.

[Likeasow]

Thank you all! feel reassured - the babywearing is working for me too - can't see how to do it otherwise! also need to be more organised to get things done - difficult when knackered though isn't it - have a millionm new Years resolutions! The stress levels fluctuate but I think I am ok. Impressed with the soon to be 4 and the 6 DC! well done - the more the merrier eh?
I have to just go with the flow and DD3 will have to follow her big sisters for a while and find her way alongside.....
Gigglewitch - its the bedtimes and bathtimes that are the trickiest - thanks for the reassurance.

[lovecamping]

my third is 10 months now and we have no routine whatsoever. its probably the reason for him not sleeping through the night and is still in our bed from about 2am onwards, waking several times in the night. in the evenings he sleeps on the sofa whilst dh and i get some time on our own.

so i've definitely got a tough battle ahead - new year's resolution is to get him sleeping in his cot in the evenings .

SO dont worry you're not alone. it wasnt until ds started to sit and crawl that i felt i could put him down and left alone for a few mins. he was literally carried for the first six months of his life .

we do have a very stricit timetable in the mornings and evenings as well. dd1 is at school, so everyone gets up at 7am, breakfast, teeth & face, get dressed and then they have 30mins tv before we leave for school. i shut off the tv 10 mins before we need to leave for shoes, coats any last minute nappy changes (toddler still in nappies) and anything else that can go wrong (usually one of them now asks for food). and then we're off. although its only a 20 minute walk to school, i give myself 30 minutes.

bathtime is at 6.30-6.45pm. ds & dd2 bath together, ds is then out and dd1 goes in - more warm water and lots more toys. ds is dried, dressed and then bed. then back to get the girls sorted. dd2 bed (7.30pm)and dd1 gets to stay up whilst i put dishes away and chatting. all in bed by 8.00pm. then ds will wake up and i'll need to feed him before putting him on the sofa.
DH arrives home about 8.00pm.

so thats our routine on a good day ... bad days are kids screaming, tv on constantly and me crying to DH to get him to come home at 6.00pm if i'm lucky. there have been fewer of these days as they've all got older. dds play together better and more often. ds can amuse himself if the girls are around ... so it has gotten easier.

it'll be all worth it when you hear all three of them giggling/laughing ....

[Likeasow]

I think its nice for them to be carried all the time - breaks the back though as they get hefty. new Years resolution to wake up at 7 and get the morning and bedtime routines down - I can sympathise with the crying to the husband to come home early - I did that with only one with DD1 which makes my laugh now - but first time round is the hardest I think

[fruitful]

Reading this with interest! I have dd (5.5), ds1 (2.11 and in nappies) and ds2 (3 weeks, eeeeek!). My plan is to concentrate on surviving rather than on getting it right. I have just survived 3 weeks, and that is 3 weeks that I never have to do again! And managed to enjoy the odd 5 minutes here and there too.

My plan for bathtimes is not to give them a bath unless dh is here. Although he is in the throes of a new business start-up [manic grin]. I wonder if I can persuade dd to shower herself while I get the boys dried?

I'm thinking about putting the playpen up so I can leave ds2 in it under a playgymn, if he is willing, without fear of being run over by ds1 on Thomas.

I am so not looking forward to the school run.

[fruitful]

Likeasow - when I had only dd, dh regularly used to get greeted at the front door by both dd and me in tears!

[Likeasow]

My DH too - or in a starfish shape on the floor wailing 'she won't stop crying"! my DH does the school fun most days THANK GOD - I did it once with all 3 and was late and looking a bit fragile - another Mum (with 3 herself a bit later on stage) gave me a hug and a knowing smile and I only just managed to escape without blubbing. Not my finest hour but like you say - want to survive not get it right - whats right anyway? much better to grow up in a happy chaos - like tonight - thought I was doing quite well but DD1 and DD2 have gone to bed and I 've just realised I forgot to brush their teeth....not getting them out of bed though - time for a big glass of wine......

[Likeasow]

that should have been 'run' - a Freudian slip?

[Likeasow]

tonight good- all 3 in bath and then DD3 got ready for bed on floor in warm steamy bathroom (she is very snotty) and the other two playing in bath until happy to get out then off to put on PJs while DD3 is put to bed....wouldn't work so well if I had to feed them too though - DH cooking in the kitchen and entertaining kids post bath.

[scanner]

I had three very close together and although dh very hands on, he works abroad a lot and long hours. I found the best approach was to get the youngest to fit into the routine already established for the middle one. So, when my middle dc had a nap during the day, I put the baby down too, eventually he got the hang of it and I managed to have them both sleep for two hours a day at the same time - phew.

[scanner]

Also you have to get used to being a bit more slapdash, ie baths don't have to happen every night etc.

[Likeasow]

yes - hate to admit when DD3 last had a proper bath before tonight - I'll have social services round!