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Softly softly, fingers crossed & hope approach to teeth cleaning?

34 replies

Anticyclone · 04/10/2015 21:08

So I'm giving my 13mo a toothbrush with toothpaste on it, and letting him get on with it on his own. I'm trying to get him to copy me, but I'm not brushing his teeth for him - he won't let me go anywhere near his mouth. Has anyone had any long term success, and more importantly not caused any damage to their DCs teeth doing something like this?

He has a pretty healthy diet, his teeth look good so far (he only has 6), and he seems to quite like the taste of the toothpaste.

I don't want to be causing damage to his teeth, but I'd prefer not to go down the physical force route if at all possible.

Anyone else done this? Did it work out OK?

OP posts:
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polkadotdelight · 04/10/2015 22:10

Im watching with interest. Teeth cleaning is a battle with 12 month old DS.

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LuckyLuckyMe · 04/10/2015 22:18

Also watching but for a different reason. My dentist told me to brush DD's teeth til they were at least 8 as he said they do not have the dexterity to brush properly til then.

Everyone I've said this to in RL looks at me like Hmm

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RockCrushesLizard · 04/10/2015 22:23

I went down that route, and DD was always happy to brush her own teeth, good diet etc, unfortunately when she went for a check up at 2.5, the dentist could already see softness in the crevices of the molars that had only been in a few months.

We very quickly had to go to enforcing, and insisting on brushing for her for at least half of the time. It took a large number of bribes/manhandling/negotiating to get the habit in place.

It wasn't fun, but she got the all clear at the dentist at the last check up, so I'm taking it as one of the many bad mummy (no chocolate for breakfast, yes you do have to wipe your bum) things I have to do to be a good parent!

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hazeyjane · 04/10/2015 22:27

Our dentist said similar. Dd1 was rubbish at brushing her teeth up until the age of 7ish. Disclosing tablets helped.

With ds we wrapped in a towel, when he refused to have his teeth brushed - we were gentle and there were lots of cuddles - but it is just too important for it to be done and done properly.

Sorry, not much help!

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Misty9 · 04/10/2015 22:31

We also don't give them the choice - but don't drag it out when we have to enforce it. With dd, 17 months, I do "tickle teeth" which seems to help her let me do it. With 4yo ds, he just gets told to stop being so dramatic if he screams while we try to do it! This is after they both give it a go themselves obviously.

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slithytove · 04/10/2015 22:34

We go down the 'pin them on the floor and brush while they scream route'.

In all honestly, the screaming never lasts long, and it's one of those tough parts of parenting where it's for their own good. I'd rather this than fillings or pulled teeth.

This has to be done about 50% of the time, the rest of the time, they let us do it happily with a "let's brush the little red car, I can see a bus, there is a duck which needs cleaning" technique.

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OnlyHereToday · 04/10/2015 22:34

Break it down into steps and go slowly and reward with every bit of progress and compliance. So, find something motivating that you control, blowing bubbles maybe, then let him start by touching or brushing your teeth, blow some bubbles, repeat for a few days.

Then move on to touching his teeth, next time put the brush in his mouth, blow some bubbles for each step etc until you get there.

If too much resistance go back a step or find another motivator or take a break.

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OnlyHereToday · 04/10/2015 22:36

Oh yes, we chase sugar bugs around their mouths, the youngest likes that! We still brush ours at six and nine about half the time.

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f1fan2015 · 04/10/2015 22:59

LuckyLuckyMe I brush my 5 year old DD's teeth on a night. She brushes her own at lunchtime at school but I don't feel confident she is covering all her teeth on her own - you are not alone Grin

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Boosiehs · 04/10/2015 23:03

Too important to let them do it themselves or worry about being gentle.

DS (2) cries most of the time at the beginning then is ok at the end. Once I've had a good go he likes to do it himself, a good compromise I think.

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UngratefulMoo · 05/10/2015 08:15

We do DD's I'm afraid - it's too important. She really likes to do it, so we take 'turns'. I also try and brush my own at the same time, but when it's time for me to take over I just take a no nonsense, get it over with approach. It has to be done.

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Anticyclone · 05/10/2015 19:39

Thanks for the replies, lots to think about. If it looks like going down this route will cause teeth damage, then maybe it's time to get serious.

OP posts:
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ODog · 06/10/2015 10:21

Probably not an approved method but I find that doing it in front of the TV distracts my 16mo enough to let me do it with minimal fuss. I approach nail cutting and hair brushing in the same way!

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f1ddlesticks · 10/10/2015 22:07

It's hideous isn't it? DD has just turned 2 and is now really strong so me doing it with her wrapped in a towel takes a fair bit of wrestling! She does try herself but ends up faffing around quite a bit. I've been really worried that forcing her will end up creating a fear of teeth brushing.

Love the suggestion about the bubbles. Think I might give that a go. She's nobody's fool though, I tried having Peppa 'brush them' for her (holding the tooth brush with her Peppa toy's hands) and she looked at me like Hmm...

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museumum · 10/10/2015 22:12

We do ds's (25mo) at night but let him do his own in the morning copying me while I do mine. I don't think he'll learn at all if I don't let him try and I hope one good clean and one half clean a day is enough (three days a week he also does a self-clean at nursery after lunch).

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Pico2 · 10/10/2015 22:18

We did the pin down and brush technique with DD1. Our dentist said they need to be done by an adult until at least 6 as they can't track which teeth they've brushed and which they still have to do. DD1 stopped being difficult to brush for some time between 2 & 3.

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Littlef00t · 11/10/2015 13:48

Right, I've tried several ways and have hit on a firm but gentle way that seems to be working. Dd is 19 months so can reason a bit more.

Tried:

Pin down and brush while screaming (screaming as soon as toothbrush seen)
Mummy 'helping' by also holding brush (wriggling away)
Two brushes, your turn my turn (pursed lips on my turn unfortunately)

We now do two brushes but no story until I get in enough. Rather than forcing my way in I praise any sort of cooperation massively but don't do story until she cooperates. to start it was even letting me touch her lips with the brush, then letting me in at all. 'Enough' was just bottom molars for a while, then top and bottom, and now molars and a quick all over. Hopefully get to front of teeth and more thorough in next month or so.

Role play with beloved dolly, roaring and aaaahhh, eeeeh noises have all helped, along with letting her brush mine, watching me brush, standing at the sink etc.

To be honest what 'works' does vary from week to week.

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DoJo · 12/10/2015 11:42

2 minutes morning and evening - absolutely non-negotiable. Son is now 3 1/2 and although he sometimes has a bit of a dramatic moment on the subject, he knows that there is absolutely no way he is getting away without having them done. I think setting the tone early can help so if you can get into a good routine now then hopefully as he gets older, he will just see it as a 'thing you do' rather than something worth trying to negotiate on.

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Eminado · 12/10/2015 11:45

We have

  1. Dds turn (where she sucks off all the paste and brushes about 2 teeth


Then
  1. Mummy's turn


It is to important to me to mess about with
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Glitterspy · 12/10/2015 13:36

Um, this may be totally against the rules but I use my oral b electric toothbrush on DD (2.5). I do her teeth with this thoroughly at night, and either she does her own (with a buzzy kids toothbrush) or I also do hers in the mornings too. I agree it's too important to mess about with. She screams sometimes and is quite compliant others. Helps if she's in the bath/ somehow distracted while we do the evening clean.

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GothicRainbow · 12/10/2015 19:24

We let our DS (2.5) do his own in the morning after his breakfast - he has both a brush baby rubber toothbrush and a normal one for that.

I do the evening teeth clean with a Thomas toothbrush that times 1 min with flashing lights - he's learning the lights have to have two goes before we're done. I've found brushing in the bath works best for us but we do still get crying and whining.

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jellybaby49 · 12/10/2015 19:37

We use the Brushtime app to distract our kiddies, it's on our phone and slowly reveals a picture over 2 minutes. If you use certain toothpaste and brushes (I think Oral B) you can also scan these in the app, but they aren't essential!! Kids watch the picture while we do their teeth. They are 7 and 5 and we have never (yet) had any issues at the dentist

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Flutterbutterfly · 12/10/2015 19:37

Pin and brush! I still pin and brush the six year old if he's pissing about.

Dentist says that they have lovely teeth. (I still brush the older childrens teeth after they have.)

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PacificMouse · 12/10/2015 19:40

Ive done that softy approach and both my dcs have no issue at all with their teeth. I really don't agree with an approach where you are in effect forcing a child to do something that isn't that necessary but unconfortable.
For me it's at the same level that forcing a child to have a verruca treatment (Recent thread about that) and several GP/consultant came over saying this would be considered abuse in their professional role.

Cleaning the teeth of someone else can be really unconfortable as you have no real idea where is the gum/teeth nor about the force you are putting on the brush.

What I DID though is to buy an electric tootbrush as they are much more efficient than a manual one (That solves the issue of the children not been able to properly brush their teeth until they are 8yo) amd use an adult toothpaste very early on (Advised by our dentist).

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CeylonSapphire · 12/10/2015 19:42

Please make sure you're doing it properly. We are reeling this year from having spent nigh on £2k to have dd1's teeth sorted. We have consistently brushed her teeth since they came through, but then discovered she had hypermineralisation. No fault of ours, but it leads to weak teeth at age 6 she now has 3 crowns, one extraction and fillings in 'big' teeth. We feel so guilty. The key is not only brushing, but also flossing!

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