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Parenting

How to explain death of a dog to a nearly two year old

3 replies

Chocolatestain · 23/10/2014 14:08

We have recently moved into a property with a bungalow annexe for my elderly mother-in-law. DS is nearly 23 months and very excited to have both Granny and her little dog living next door. Contact with the dog has always been closely supervised as he was elderly and not used to children and lately it was clear he was unwell and has been sleeping a lot so DS has not seen much of him. This morning the dog was diagnosed with cancer and put down. I've just picked up DS from nursery and he is having a nap at the moment. Nursery were helpful with suggestions about how to explain about death to such a young child, but I was wondering if anyone has any experience/advice. I was thinking of something along the lines of 'Mikko hurt very badly all the time (DS understands hurt) so he has gone to a special place where he won't hurt and will be happy, but he can't come back to see us and that will be sad for us'.

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Whatabeautifulsight10 · 23/10/2014 15:37

Hi chocolate,

I wanted to reply as the post was sad sorry to hear about the family dog.

I think what you've said sounds perfect. I have qualifications in working with children, and my own baby, and I think in your situation I would say exactly the same. You've explained what's happened, where he is now, given reassurance that he's not hurt anymore, and explained that sadly he cannot come back.

From experiencing this myself as a child, although I was around 3 so obviously had more of an understanding, my mum took me round the garden and I picked some flowers, and I wrote our cat a letter saying 'i will miss you' and she sent it to 'the special place' our cat was. I found this nice as it was a last something I could do, and I think I sent a blanket too, so the cat would be warm.

Obviously at 23 months your ds may not quite have the understanding as a 3 year old, but perhaps a picture or something?

I think my mum did this with me as I became anxious that our cat was feeling ok, and this offered a sort of closure?

It sounds like you've got it covered though. I hope it goes okSad

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tenderbuttons · 23/10/2014 15:40

If you can get hold of Goodbye Mog, it's brilliant at explaining the death of an elderly pet, and very much along the lines of what you have said above.

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Chocolatestain · 23/10/2014 22:31

Thank you both for your advice. We popped in to have tea with MIL, she was clearly upset and DS was satisfied with a simple 'Mikko's gone' so I left it at that for today as I didn't want to upset her further. I'll explain to DS when we're on our own and he next mentions Mikko - I think it will be easier for him without Granny there getting upset.

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