Thanks for your suggestion, we did buy a cd that had a story/relaxation theme but unfortunately that didn't work. G is adamant that she isn't afraid of being in her bedroom and in fact insists her door is almost closed!
My DSS is 8 and me and DP went through a similar thing with him in the summer. He worried that we would go to sleep before him and kept getting up to check we were still up and awake. We tried talking to him, telling him off, stopping him playing computer games, sending him to bed early. In the end I got some Bach's Rescue Remedy Night. We gave him the 4 drops before bed and it helped him fall asleep quickly.
We used it for about a week, told him that's as long as you can use it for, and he had got into a routine of falling asleep by then so bedtime was much better. We still keep a bottle which we give him sometimes when he can't sleep. But it's much rarer now.
As you probably guess from my nickname I am a grandmother. We have a problem with G. Since August she has been having tantrums at bedtime on a regular basis. She is afraid her mother will go to sleep before her and so continuously calls her to make sure she is awake. this can lead to confrontation when G will lash out and scream and shout until she is hoarse. During the day, on the whole she is well behaved and evenings are not a problem either, usually spent playing games or watching tv together. The problem arises as soon as bedtime comes around. If anyone has experienced anything similar I would be grateful if you would share your experiences with us.