Hello everyone,
I have a 3.5 year old little boy and have been ttc number 2 for 17 months. We have had 1 early miscarriage but otherwise, nothing. I am finding it increasingly difficult around some of my friends who have DC1 the same age as my little boy. They all (now without exception) have a second child and in some cases third, in fact now friends who had their first child over a year after me are now starting to fall pregnant.
I am very happy for all of them and love their addditional little ones, but I find myself getting upset by some of their remarks when they complain about juggling their children, or how they are fed of with being pregnant, want to go out and get drunk etc! They don't want to go through labour and sleepless nights, I just want to say I would give anything to be in that situation. I know it is all natural for them to say those things, and I am aware I will have said similar things in front of people who might well be ttc number 1. I don't say anything, just go home, have a whinge to DH and a sob and get back on with it.
However recently now our first children are getting older and going to preschool. I have been along to a couple of coffee mornings when the older kids have been at preschool and been acutely aware I am the only person sitting there without a second or third child. Whilst it is fantastic to drink my coffee uninterrupted I find myself sitting there thinking about my situation. As the smaller ones are there the conversations go on to things like weaning, routines etc and whilst I contribute with my own experiences it is just hard.
Do any of you feel like this? I don't want to draw away from my friends as I do love them and their children, it is just that I find it difficult to spend time with them without it upsetting me. I am just not sure how to handle it and I find that whilst I can talk to my friends about anything, I just can't talk to them about this as there is nothing they can do. It is all my issue!
Anyone got any suggestions of ways that have helped them deal with similar feelings and situations?
Thanks for reading
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One-child families
Want a 2nd child but no luck. Struggling around friends with number 2 and 3
7 replies
fairy26 · 28/02/2012 10:40
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