Is 5.5 months too young to go to nursery.

[Myrtle1]

I'm due back at work soon after maternity leave and plan to go back PT and work 2.5 or 3 days a week. DS will go to nursery. Part of me is looking forward to going back to work but part of me feels really sad about leaving DS at nursery for 2.5 or 3 full days. I'm worried about how he will cope with it and if he will miss me or will it mean that we have a less close relationship? How has it worked for all you working mums out there?
Also, have yet to decide what days I will do but do you think it is better for DS if I work the 2.5 or 3 days in a block or try and space the days out during the week.
Sorry this is such a long question

[belgo]

It is normal here in Belgium for babies to go full time to nursery from the age of 16 weeks. I know one baby go full time at the age of 7 weeks.

I think two or three days at the age of 5.5 months will be fine. If he goes three days in a row then he might be very tired, three days split up might be better, but it's up to you to find what works for you and your work best.

[uwila]

I think he's old enough to go to day care. And, it's only part time. My kids went into care full time muchyounger than that. DD was a month and DS was 3 months. They both love me to bits. So, no bonding issues.

However I have used a childminder and nannies so they've never been in nursery. But, I expect the bonding issues would be the same.

DD, now 3, only now has begun to complain about me going to work. But, I just explain that sometime we have to do things we don't want to do and today I have to go to work.

PS It will probably be harder on you than on DS.

[ScottishMummy]

i put my baby in at 6 month full time to nursery - he loves it and has positively thrived, there were babies in there from @4month old.because he went in at 6month he took in his stride and did not get anxious or cry when i went, but i felt kinda woobly. so chances are baby will settle in but u will feel a bit funny bout it, but again this reduces. i think nursery is a positive experience, you retain your career the baby gets additional socialisation and confidence

i work full time so cant comment about your work pattern but i would imagine a straight period onf consecutive days would be preferential so u are adequtely rested and youi get time with the baby

Good luck

be prepared for the baby getting some low grade infections eg conguctivitis, colds etc but dont worry about it this is natural and it builds up the immune system

[ScottishMummy]

Ooh and also look at ofsted reports - online ofsted.co.uk for any nursery you are considering and also do visits and settling in sessions

ofsted link - click and go for reports

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alison

[Marina]

Both mine started at this age, one p/t, one f/t, and as others have said myrtle, they were fine.
No bonding issues here either. Personally I think you and the nursery will both find settling easier if you do your days in a block.
5.5 months has the plus point of being before separation anxiety usually kicks in (in all babies, nb, not ones with mums back at work) so your baby will be in a by-then familiar setting when he does go through this stage.
I'm sorry to say that you will miss him more than he misses you - but leaving them gets easier and a good nursery will take care of YOU as well as ds as you get used to your new routine.
A settling in period is vital so if you have not already done so you should be starting to leave ds for a short time first, working up to a full day.

[fennel]

2 of mine started nursery at this age, for 2 or 3 days. We spaced them out partly because I liked to spread out the days of not seeing them, not have several days at once (also it helped with breastfeeding/expressing I think, having the days spaced out).

My babies seemed very happy at nursery at that age, they were in a special baby room with 6 babies and 2 carers, all very quiet and gentle. We had a 2 week settling in period - going every day for 2 weeks for longer periods each day! - which I found a bit excessive but the nursery insisted.

[REIDnotREEDorREAD]

my ds is due to start nursery at 5.5 months old. i have already gone back to work (ds no4 4.5 months) and he is with parents and in laws. I must admit the bonding issue did cross my mind too. i am a little worried that he will forget who his mummy is, because he is being passes from pillar to post at the moment

i am glad we decided to put him into nursery for the social side of it, but i dont half miss him!!

[jellybellie]

My ds started full time nursery at 6 months and to echo everybody elses comments, I'm sure I missed him more than he missed me! A word of warning though - the first few weeks were really hard emotionally on me despite ds settling really well and having no problems at all (quite the opposite really), but once I got used to the new routine it was fine. Even at that age, they get involved in all kinds of activities that I never would have done at home with him and that gorgeous smile every evening when I collect him is just great!!

[Bozza]

Both DS and DD have gone to nursery from this age Tues-Thurs and thrived. I have a very close relationship with both of them. DD is much more of a hindrance to my relationship with DS than going to nursery ever was.

[handlemecarefully]

It depends on the Nursery - if you are confident that it is a caring environment with highly motivated staff who nurture and stimulate the children then it will be totally fine.

But if you have any doubts about the Nursery then I wouldn't entertain it (speaking as a mum who put her children in Nursery from the age of 6 months until I quit work)

[Myrtle1]

Thanks for all your replies, it is very reassuring
DS is quite a sociable little chap and likes meeting new people and doing new things so I'm sure he'll be fine, I'll just miss him when I go back to work.
Re, the settling in period, is 2 weeks the norm before I leave him properly for the full 3 days?
ps. ScottishMummy, thanks for the ofsted link, its really useful. The nursery I had in mind and which we visited has a really good report.

[ScottishMummy]

Myrtle

all the responses have been favourable and informative - so GOOD LUCK

keep smiling

settling in times etc vary from nursery to nursery, and to a certain extent u can be flexible. mine offered starter sessions of half day then begin full day sesion

i dont regret going back, yes i miss the baby but i love my career and worked really hard to get established - but i DO miss the baby, as i said it gets easier (well i have found so in past few months)

so soon u be back in swing of things and baby be meeting new wee pals - NICE

[poppynic]

I don't know if your nursery will allow this, but my Mum has worked in various creches/nurseries and she always recommends Mums visit baby at midday if they can. Although baby might seem a bit unsettled at the second leaving they settle very quickly again and last better for the full day. It also encourages the staff to ensure baby gets attention before Mum turns up. You will also get a better of idea of how the nursery actually operates. Good luck.

[Hulababy]

DD started nursery 2 days a week (next to each other, and then third day at grandparents) at 5.5 months and thrived. From the start she enjoyed her time there. We never had a day's problem. She moved nursery at age 2, because of my work changes, and loves it again. Only just left to go to school in September, and still talks findly of her nursery days.

She got to do far more at nursery then I would have done with her, especially with crafts stuff!

DD is very loving and gentle. There were no bonding problems at all. She loves her mummy and daddy, and has great relationships with other family and friends too, and she had good relationships with her carers at nursery - the nursery was the kind where babies and children were hugged and sat on knees, etc.

[Hulababy]

Ree settling in. At 5 months we did just one settling in session. DD was fine at that and just didn't need more. I was on a training day my first work day back, so said they could call me anytime if need be, and nursery was close to work. But she was fine.

[Ceebee74]

MY DS is 6 months old and due to start nursery the week after next - I am working Wed, Thurs, Fri as I prefer to do it all in one block.

He has had 4 settling in sessions so far (2 hours each) and has been absolutely fine - not missed me at all - next week he is going for 2 4hour sessions so the nursery have been really good in terms of ensuring he is settling in ok.

As others have said, I miss him much more than he misses me - but I really think it is for the best as I am hoping he will learn to be sociable etc.

Glad there have been some positive messages on here as it has made me feel better.

[AllyH]

I agree, both of mine started at this age and only had about 1 hour settling in before starting properly - kids adapt so easily.

They've both been through the clingy stages since (dd is 4yr and ds is 22mths) but they know it's the routine and are happy seconds after you leave their room.

It's great to come home to shrieks of delight and try and get them to communicate what they've done for the day, with dd it's often 'don't know'!

But do think to do the days in a block is better as ds struggles even now to know what day it is!

Not convinced with the visiting the child in the day though, think it mixes them up even more and harder for you too, would wait till you can turn up and take them home (they like that!)

[Nip]

My DS went into nursery at 5.5 months, 5 days a week and he really enjoys it.

My DS is very close to me, and even more so now. When i pick him up he smiles and is so VERY happy.
Being at nursery for me is great, he gets on very well, i'm happy and they contact me if there are any problems.

Dont panic, you'll be fine, i felt very similar to you.

[Nip]

Oh and there was a settling in period where you could take DS for an hour, this worked well and made it easier to leave him the first day

[marimum]

my baby went to nursery at 7 months and settled in brilliantly. My friend sent her boy at 4.5 months and he also fitted in well. I have been told that it is best to settle them at nursery before they turn one year as otherwise they find it hard.