Patronising Nursery Manager

[MrsSleepypan]

Hi

Just wondering if I am being overly sensitive. I called nursery to let them know I wouldn't be bringing DS in today as he has a bad cough and seems generally under the weather. The nursery manager replied that they do not exclude children because of coughs, if they did they would never have any children there. Am I being silly to be upset by her response? (This isn't the first time I have found her to be patronising) I'm upset enough that DS is missing a day at nursery as he has only been going for 4 weeks. He seems to enjoy it but doesn't eat or sleep well there (which I'm guessing is just as he settles in). So I feel missing a day might make settling in take even longer as he won't be back there until next week now. Sorry for the ramble. Perhaps I am just overreacting and a bit upset that he has to miss out. Now, I'm wondering if I should have just sent him in anyway even if I wasn't sure he was well enough in himself? How do you decide if your child is well enough to go?

[BloominNora]

I think you are being a bit over sensitive. I think she was just trying to reassure you that from the nurseries point of view you don't need to keep him off for a cough - in case you had to work or had other things to do.

[CaTsMaMmA]

I think she is letting you know you will still be paying for the day.

[BloominNora]

How old is he? My kids only miss nursery or school if they are throwing up or are really lethargic.

If he is OK in himself and it's just a cough or cold, I'd dose him up and send him in. The distraction will do him good and they'look call you to collect if they think he is too ill to be there.

[timeforabrewnow]

I don't think you are being overly sensitive. You're the parent. If you don't think your son is well enough for nursery, than that is up to you - regardless of the nursery manager or of people on Mumsnet.

You know your child better than anyone.

[StrawberryTallCake]

It's up to you whether you send him or not, she was just telling you that he was free to come in if you want him to. I keep my dcs off sometimes when they seem under the weather or just about to come down with something when they would still be allowed in. I can because I'm their Mum.

My ideas are if they genuinely don't seem themselves, too tired to dance around and have fun, lethargic, deep coughs, bad colds, flu, temperature, dodgy rashes and the obvious sickness and diarrhoea then I keep them at home.

Don't worry about the nursery manager, if you think he should be at home then he stays at home! Enjoy a quiet day together.

[MrsSleepypan]

Thanks everyone. You have given me the reassurance that I needed. I think I was a bit sensitive about her response but DS is my first so this is all new to me and can't help worrying I'm making the wrong decisions!

BloominNora DS is 13 months.

[FernGullysWoollyPully]

When I worked at nursery, it used to really make my teeth itch when our manager was so unnecessary with parents. It's all about money. I left to have my own children and I would never go back.

As others have said, if he's under the weather and not well enough to be distracted by having fun, nursery will serve as no distraction whatsoever. And to be honest, staff find an ill child who is screaming and unhappy or sleepy and uncooperative a real chore.

Don't worry about the snarky manager. Be confident in yourself. Let him be at home safe in the knowledge that you've done the right thing and let him recover.