Mumsnet Talk

I get a lot more done when I log out of MN and stay away from Twitter.

Hello Oliver,
I would like to know what he thinks of modern social media - is it a hindrance or a help in our lives? And how much is too much?

Hi Oliver, really enjoy your column.

Feeling good about yourself makes you happy. Giving something to someone, having your views on MN agreed with, looking good all make you happy. None of these are things that can be bought or legislated for.

So my Q is: What is the role of government in this? Beyond ensuring that everyone has a roof, how can they help people to be happy?

sounds like he is very young, enthusiastic and optimistic....completely opposite to me then, I'll try to think of a suitable question!

Hi Oliver. Can you list 3 things everyone should and could do to be a bit happier?

I need to read up on you first but...

Can you be poor and happy in this world without being a monk?

Hi Oliver, enjoy your column :-)

My question is: due to the the financial crisis and subsequent government cuts, huge numbers of people are going to lose their jobs (myself included) and as a consequence of that, many will lose their homes. How can these people remain optimistic?

The key to happiness is knowing where you're going - having some goals. The winds of change may not always blow in our favour but we can adjust our sails as long as we know where we're headed, even if we get blown off track occasionally.
Also - think about what you want - not what you don't want! Try it - it works! We may not always be able to control what happens but we are able to choose our response - isn't that what 'response-ability' means?!

what advice would you offer someone who is a world class procrastinator? (apart from, get off your arse).

I'd second some advice on getting motivated to do stuff (not boring day to day stuff but interesting stuff) rather than sitting around watching TV, browsing mumsnet etc!

Also any advice on how to stop feeling so bitter about life, mainly other people's lives, so much? Since my ds was very poorly last year I can't stop myself thinking how other people seem to have such easy lives (although I do know it may appear this way on the surface, it's very often not the case) and wishing people would have more of a bumpy ride in life (although I don't wish nasty stuff on them just that they should realise not everything is as easy as they think it is).

God I sound like a right bitch! I just want to be happier and not feel like everything negative happens to me and my family.

Hi Oliver!

Good questions toomuchmonthatendofthemoney, maxmissie, I could use some of that advice as well!

Don't worry, maxmissie, not all the negative stuff is headed your direction, some is falling my way.

We need a good umbrella!

Hi Oliver, I'm a big fan...

Do you think you can "think yourself happy"? If your life is pretty rubbish, is it possible to force yourself to be happy by thinking or acting differently?

Love your work!

Having had the money and time for navel gazing I have purchased a fair bit of therapy. The most useful but obvious (and yet I needed to pay to be told it) seems to be acceptance therapy ie accept where you are now and how you feel about it and then move forward.

What do you really think about the use of therapy to find happiness?

Thanks

Bonjour Oliver. A question from France : the title of your book implies the readers would like to "get a bit more done": don't you think that the very title of the book very much refers to the consumption society, where everyone should be productive, whose aim would be to "get things DONE" ? I don't have a "to do list"(what a horrible term)and I see proscrastination as one of the great pleasures in life.

Oliver, what do you know about teenagers? In particular, how do you convince a 15-year-old that it is worth working for his exams because he'll feel like such a twit if he doesn't?

When he was 4, deferred gratification worked like this: if you are good when we go shopping, WHEN WE GET HOME you will be able to watch a DVD. He believed me and everything in the garden was rosy. Now he doesn't believe a word I say and thinks he knows best. He doesn't! Can you help?

Hi Oliver,
Just wondering what you think of medication for depression? Sorry, haven't read your column, don't know if you've covered this. I have been depressed recently due to events beyond my control.I have always preferred to avoid drugs.I am much more inclined to feel depressed in winter, could it be s.a.d.? Do you believe in that?

Oliver, can you expand a bit on 'lifehacking' and what it actually means? What do you do to hack your life? Because the stuff about how irrational we all are about money (saving in one account while running up debts on a credit card) rang true!

Your book cheered me up - moderation in everything and all you can essentially do is put in time and effort (parenting, relationships etc). Sounds good to me!

Well, not ALL things, or that would be extremist!

Oh! I forgot it's January I must go out and buy a self-help book!
Oliver, How do I stop this bad habit of buying books to make life better then finding that I have a stack of books and not moved from the sofa to get those things done?
I keep meaning to sell them in a boot sale with my other life enhancing junk e.g Gym ball, various keep-fit videos, keep-fit clothes, Wii fit, weights, food processor, bread maker,(yes, stupid me) slow cooker medicine ball & Bicycle.

Hi Oliver
Actually I find it quite hard to be happy- not sure why
I have two very happy and healthy children who I adore
A job which though stressful I love, lots of lovely friends and family, a pretty good relationship with my partner.
So why am I not bouncing around full of happiness?
I am very very aware of how awful life can be so I guess really my question is how do we appreciate what we do have ?

Is it true that all your best jokes are supplied by your Guardian colleagues?

In particular the famously good at pub quiz colleagues?