Hello,
I'm hoping people might be able to give me some advice on a difficult and sad situation.
We moved into our house 2.5 years ago but still get post now and then for the people that lived here previously (a couple with a young daughter). They didn't leave a forwarding address, but I do have an email address for them.
We've been away so our post has built up and I was opening a whole pile of it when I opened a letter sent to them by mistake. It was a letter from a local crematorium saying that they are still holding the cremated remains of their baby, but that unless they replied to the letter within two weeks the remains would be scattered in the crematorium's garden of remembrance. The letter was from more than two weeks ago, however my husband rang the crematorium this morning and they haven't been scattered yet. He offered to give the person he spoke to the email address of the old owners of our house, but although they eventually agreed to write it down they essentially said they weren't willing to contact them via email. My husband asked whether we should email them and the person on the phone said 'I can't stop you' but implied they didn't think we should. They said that they have had the ashes for 3 years.
I haven't had children, and feel a bit at a loss as to what the right thing is to do. Part of me thinks that if the parents had wanted to do anything with the ashes then they would have done so by now, and that maybe they don't want to be reminded of a painful time - particularly as I wonder if selling the house and moving was part of a 'fresh start' for them? And emailing them about this feels intrusive. But the other part of me thinks that they have the right to know this information?
Should we email them with a scanned copy of the letter to let them know, or assume that they have decided for good reasons to not arrange to do anything with the ashes and so wouldn't welcome a reminder of it?
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum.
Miscarriage/pregnancy loss
Received letter for old house owners re cremation
16 replies
mermer2016 · 03/11/2016 16:29
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.