It's been six months since she was born and buried and I miss her so much that I feel sick. I am very lucky to have another DS and a loving DH but I am really struggling today. It's gotten to the point where although I never miss her less, I miss her less often if you know what I mean. When I do think about her, it stilll takes my breath away, but I'm able to function and ever talk about her now which is something that I never thought would happen.
Most of my friends, even those that are very kind and were supportive, seem to have forgotten she existed. Everyone expected me to be over it within a month or so of her birth (I had a friend really nag me to join a night out multiple times when I declined) and I've really lost friends over this. Or rather, perhaps I should say that I've found out who my real friends are. Two friends in particular that hadn''t been as close in the last couple of year but who were my best friends for the previous decade both sent flowers and then disappeared.
I think I just feel so lonely sometimes. I find myself crying in the car a lot which is weird. My DH is supportive but I feel alone in the depth of my grief. And I feel uncomfortable crying in front of my friends, even though I know they wouldn't mind.
I just don't think the enormity of what happened hit me for months, and now it's catching up with me. I find myself looking at little girls and wondering what she would have been like. My arms are so empty. Please tell me it gets better.
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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss
I'm struggling today. I miss my stillborn daughter more than I can say.
9 replies
homeiswheretheginis · 17/05/2016 14:42
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