If you don't want to tell your boss you're having a miscarriage....

(18 Posts)
ecuse Sun 30-Mar-14 18:52:52

... but need to email in a reason why you a) will miss important meetings tomorrow, b) will try to wfh but may not be terribly productive and c) are not sure when you will next be in...

...what excuse do you use?

That sounds 'serious' enough that they realise you're not taking the piss, but without giving the game away.

I will tell him of necessary, and he will be sympathetic and fine, but I am in line for promotion and I don't ideally want it to be known that I'm TTC.

MeepMeepVroooom Sun 30-Mar-14 18:55:52

A personal medical emergency?

I used this when I had my first miscarriage and nobody questioned it, second time I need signed off so had to tell them.

I'm sorry for your loss thanks

stargirl1701 Sun 30-Mar-14 18:56:45

A gynae emergency. Most people will not enquire further.

Thinking of you thanks

AuditAngel Sun 30-Mar-14 18:59:05

I'm sorry for your loss. "Women's troubles" usually has them quaking.

LadyCybilCrawley Sun 30-Mar-14 19:00:28

"I am very sorry for the inconvenience. I have an urgent family emergency. I will ensure that I catch up on any missed work and that I don't miss any deadlines/quotas/whatever relevant measurement. Again I am sorry for the disruption - I expect to be back at work on x day"

LadyCybilCrawley Sun 30-Mar-14 19:01:41

If a woman told me she had a personal medical emergency I would immediately assume miscarriage

So sorry for your loss

Dear X,
A medical emergency has arisen such that I am unable to come to work today. Please note, I am seeking medical attention and will be in touch by the end of the day to up date you.

Regards,
Ecuse

mellicauli Sun 30-Mar-14 19:11:09

I would do a "misdiagnosis"..terrible stomach cramps..think it might be norovirus...don't wfh..you are not well.

Chottie Sun 30-Mar-14 19:15:00

I would also say a personal medical emergency too. Do not say you will work from home, don't put yourself under any more pressure.

So sorry to read your post, I hope everything goes as well as it could possibly go for you (unMN hug).

confuddledDOTcom Sun 30-Mar-14 19:19:12

Get yourself a sicknote. GPs tend to be very creative about the excuses they put on notes for personal problems, I remember mine putting "general sickness" or something like that so I didn't have to tell my employer I was in the middle of a bad depression.

Don't push yourself to do anything, I barely got out of bed for a few days.

13Stitches Sun 30-Mar-14 19:23:21

No advice, but huge hugs ecuse. (You know me, I've just NCd) x

ecuse Sun 30-Mar-14 20:27:21

thanks all. I guess I am worried that if I'm as formally vague as 'personal/medical emergency' then it looks a bit obvious but perhaps I'm overthinking it.

ecuse Sun 30-Mar-14 20:29:41

just cross posted with lots of you. You're lovely, thank you xx

ImAThrillseekerHoney Sun 30-Mar-14 20:32:25

Unfortunately I think a clued up boss might well guess if you say personal medical emergency, especially if you say gynae. I think that would be my pencilled in guess for a married woman of that age.

I said I had food poisoning, which was a flat lie, but worked. (Actually I rang my deputy and told him the truth but to tell my boss it was food poisoning).

Very best of luck for the future thanks.

Oh ecuse, I'm so sorry. Medical emergency should be fine. But don't say you'll try to WFH, you don't need to be superwoman.

I would be tempted to just tell them the truth though, if you can face it.

((((Big hugs for you))))

Kittycatcat Sun 30-Mar-14 22:05:38

Hugs ecuse.here for you lovely.

NomDeClavier Mon 31-Mar-14 06:59:56

So sorry, ecuse. Big hugs sad

I would also tend towards a misdiagnosis - stomach cramps or similar - then you could truthfully say you will seek medical attention etc and get your GP to be suitably vague with the note.

Don't WFH. Go to bed with a hot water bottle and take care of yourself.

YuccanLiederHorticulture Mon 31-Mar-14 07:11:47

Don't attempt to wfh. Look after yourself. Phone in and say diahorrea/vomiting/norovirus and take as long as you need to be able to face the world again.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now