Scared

(13 Posts)
Twinklestar3 Sun 09-Feb-14 20:47:38

Hi, last year I had two mc (one in June at 8 weeks and a mmc at 11 weeks in October, we had seen a heart beat at 8 weeks) anyway I am absolutely terrified as I am 10 weeks pregnant again and fearing another mmc, I did have a scan at 8 weeks and everything looked fine, on Tuesday morning I am having a reassurance scan in the epau (exact same weeks and days as last mmc discovered) I do have two other children and also had a mc in between them. No body around me understands my anxiety although they are there for me. Am mentally preparing myself for the worst outcome but this baby is so very much wanted. Was in a truly awful place back in October and the thought of being back there is terrifying. Just needed to vent and hopefully have some support from those that may really understand xx

toomanypasswords Sun 09-Feb-14 21:42:38

Hi, I'm not in the same situation as you but I found out last week at my 12 week scan that I had had a MMC. I also had a MC (8 weeks) back in 2011 before I had my DD. I know that I want another baby and I know that there is every chance that another pregnancy would be ok (despite the fact that I am over 35 and have had Drs going on at me for the last year or so about not being a 'spring chicken' (quote) and 'getting on with it if I want another baby' ) but I dread the thought of being pregnant again and going through a 3rd MC. Although I'm obviously not pregnant atm, I completely understand the anxiety you have and all I can think is that if I do get pregnant again, I will have to have an early scan but then start thinking about how many I'd have to have to keep me sane! Sorry, probably not a particularly helpful response but just to say that I can understand your anxiety.

Twinklestar3 Sun 09-Feb-14 21:58:28

Thank you for responding toomanypasswords, I am so sorry for your losses. I too am no spring chicken (37 soon) this is our last attempt as we feel it would be mother natures way of saying "no more". No mc is good but I found it a lot harder with the mmc as I obv had no symptoms of it going wrong, I am constantly on knicker watch, I never really get any symptoms during pregnancy (even my boobs look no different!!! ) Tuesday I am sure will come round quickly but at same time as wanting it to be here I don't!
Thank you again for listening xx

toomanypasswords Sun 09-Feb-14 22:29:32

Ahh, the knicker watch! I spent most of last Sunday rushing to the toilet every few minutes to check and double-check... I was half-dreading the scan on Mon as I was convinced it was going to go wrong (which, obviously, it unfortunately did) but also wanted it to come round to prove me wrong! Just focus on the scan you had 2 weeks ago and the fact that everything was ok then and try to be positive. Easier said than done, I know but I'm sending lots of positive vibes your way and hope for a lovely outcome on Tues. Please let us know how you get on.xx

Ruggle Mon 10-Feb-14 23:18:59

Sorry for your losses. I had a mmc at 11 weeks last July followed by a mc at 5 weeks in November, followed by another pregnancy straight away and I am now 13 weeks and all fine. I completely understand your anxiety. I was a nervous wreck before my 12 week scan. I am also no spring chicken ( turning 40 at the end of this year and this will be my first baby!)
Just wanted to share a positive story!
x

Armadale Mon 10-Feb-14 23:22:25

Twinklestar, I will be thinking of you tomorrow when you have your scan. I am well acquainted with scan doom and it is an especial kind of torture.

thanks for you

I think it helps if the person doing the scanning knows your history, IME they are then pretty quick to show you the heartbeat if it is all OK.

I will check up on this thread tomorrow to see how you are doing x

bakingtins Tue 11-Feb-14 07:23:57

Everything crossed for you twinkle

Twinklestar3 Tue 11-Feb-14 11:34:28

Thank you everyone. Had my scan and everything is fine smile so relieved to get past this point, haven't slept for two nights!! So am knackered! Hopefully I will sleep better now. Think I will be going nuts until I can at least feel him/her move. Have my 12 week scan and bloods next week.
Thank you all for caring, means a lot xxxx

bakingtins Tue 11-Feb-14 12:23:58

That's fantastic twinkle ! I'm 24 weeks pregnant after 3 MC and have been a nervous wreck throughout, but each milestone brings you a little closer. Good luck for the 12 week scan. smile

Armadale Tue 11-Feb-14 16:31:44

Wonderful news, I'm so pleased for you grin

Huffpot Tue 11-Feb-14 16:52:00

I am sorry for your previous losses and delighted to hear the scan went well twinkle

I completely understand the anxiety.

I had a late MMC last year discovered at 18 weeks and am pregnant again but was originally twins but lost another through MMC but one is hanging in there but am constantly anxious even at 19 weeks even though am feeling movements now.
I had 2 healthy pregnancies before the miscarriages and will never take a heartbeat for granted again!

It is terrifying to be pregnant again but the reassurance scans help (a bit)

toomanypasswords Wed 12-Feb-14 09:49:07

Hooray! So pleased to hear that all is ok. Please try to relax now before the next scan. Can I just ask how you arrange a reassurance scan? Having had 2 MCs now, I can't imagine waiting until 12/ 13 weeks again for any future pregnancy (assuming I'm lucky enough!) before having a scan. I'd assumed that I would have to pay for one privately. Is it one of the post code things and some areas will give you one but others won't? xx

Twinklestar3 Wed 12-Feb-14 15:19:15

Thank you everyone smile not counting my chickens just yet, but so very relieved to get past 11 weeks x
Toomanypasswords, do you have a local epau? I have been referred to mine numerous times and it was there suggestion to give me a reassurance scan , my local epau are the most lovely caring people I have ever met. Maybe when the time comes speak to your mw or gp am sure with your history you should be able to get one. I did pay for a private one back in October , that cost £100! (Cheapest local to me! ) take care xx

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