has anyone ever got anywhere complaining to CAFCASS? NIGHTMARE :(

[lionessmama]

Very long story cut short but been in court over access issues for nearly 2 years. I have a 3 1/2 year old DD. Ex currently has supervised access in contact centre BUT despite new information regarding him lying to court through the whole process about his drug and alcohol abuse and not showing for contact and being late CAFCASS have just recommended UNSUPERVISED access!

In addition to this my ex was violent, emotionally, sexually and financially abusive. they have paid very little attention to this and in the latest report the officer makes an outrageous allegation that apparently I am unable to put the needs of DD before myself. I have been the sole carer for DD since she was 9 months old , have lived in refuge, made sure that despite everything her needs have always been met and she has thrived. Even Women's Aid workers told social services I am a fantastic mother. They also wrote that ex has proved his commitment to contact?!

The entire report is an attack on me, I believe because I have made complaints about this officer before they are being completely biased. My ex who I am certain is a sociopath has wrapped this worker around his little finger and I am terrified of having to hand over my DD to this monster. Every time I have complained to CAFCASS they do a little investigation and take it no further - just suggest I go to my MP if I'm not happy. has anyone successfully taken it further?

Just a quick google of cafcass complaints brings up shocking anecdotes from people in similar positions where mothers are completely ignored and they affect of domestic violence not taken into account. how can they get away with this?? CAFCASS are not protecting children they are putting them through abuse!
I actually feel I'm on the verge of a breakdown over this. where is support for mothers ? who will believe me?

[TheXxed]

That's outrageous, I am bumping for you until someone more knowledgeable comes along.

[TheXxed]

I found this I am not sure if it helps.

www.ombudsman.org.uk/responsive-and-accountable/case-studies/complaint-not-suitable-for-consideration

[lionessmama]

wow that is EXACTLY what i am going through! im going to forward this to my solicitor / barrister (thank god i have one, feel so much for women who were not able to get legal aid after law changed) . i feel like marching to downing st - this is system is so corrupt. thank you so much for posting.

[lionessmama]

just spoke to ombudsman, and they have advised I complain straight to them . off to see my MP on Saturday to get him to sign referral. as if it has to be this hard to fight to protect your kids.

[TheXxed]

Its shocking how unprofessional cafcass can be. you are not alone in this.

[Russettbella1000]

Just bumping....The system is so corrupt and yet still states it is there in the best interests of the children. Bollocks!

If the father arrogantly says he doesn't know what part he'll be able to play (and you're really good with this and just get on with it)- I wanted baby so much more than this particular relationship and luckily for me found out I was preggers just after:0)) but then waltzes in when/if he likes you're meant to be ready to drop everything and accommodate his whims! Even worse, he might also wish to do everything via court (so he can say he 'fought for his child'-rather than just being there for her-no drama!), you have to be ready to attend a case which is taken up by the court without any evidence at all!! In my case, the father had never been denied access...He could have arranged anything he liked but it just wasn't convenient... So, to appease his own guilt he decided to launch a case. So effectively, I had to go to court and say er no he's always had access...! The tool then also triggered a section 7 because he's rather paranoid and thought I'd mention his historic drug use?? So, after over two years my daughter finally sees her dad regularly but doesn't know him...And all of this is his choice and yet still he wants people to feel sorry for him and he's so angry about it too...I don't worry about it since I am not responsible for his relationship but it's all just so frustrating and boring!

AND YET, if he hadn't decided to take responsibility (like mothers do as soon as they also discover they are about to have a baby!) and 'pop' in then no court in the land is interested!Who seeks to right the injustice of that for the child?? Oh yes, children couldn't pay the court fees could they so no there's no point....I honestly do believe it's just a way to generate revenue streams for the legal system, who are we kidding that any kind of wrong is being righted??

My ex had a solicitor who wouldn't let him speak of course while I represented myself with bundles of emails and reports (and not because I thought they'd be read but I just wanted to feel prepared put in a bit of work)..Again, just like the care of my daughter, I do it myself, my ex needs to outsource! Tbh, I do all of it just so I have a story for her just in case she's ever interested (though I'm sure/I hope she really won't be bothered!) And sorry if this offends anyone but the truth is a father in court could be anyone from a rapist to somebody who is an amazing father to the child but fact is courts will always seek to set up contact and IMO it is only to appease fathers and their so-called rights...

It does annoy me but everything is more than worth it and I'd do it all again exactly the same. I have my little girl and life really has really never been better...Let's hope the system changes soon though to at least recognise when a man has said he's not ready for responsibility...That very fact should be considered very carefully when then looking on how contact should proceed. A mother who has never flinched at responsibility and shown through actions her unconditional love is surely going to do what's best for her child and put their needs before her own so surely she needs to be listened to when contact is pursued by men who turn out to be little more than sperm donors and angry ones at that...(Btw I was with my ex for 3 years and had discussed having a baby during the relationship before we broke up iof my flippancy also offends)

[STIDW]

Usually the best way to challenge CAFCASS is in the court room rather than complaining. Although a court will usually go with a CAFCASS report it's possible to challenge the report on the basis of errors of fact or law and ultimately it is the judge who makes the final decision. HOwever a judge will have difficulty choosing between two versions of the same story without impartial evidence.

Don't underestimate the importance courts attach to contact. DV, drug and alcohol abuse aren't necessarily bars to contact unsupervised or supervised. The consideration is the effects of the abuse on the child and whether the harm the child suffers when they don't have a meaningful relationship with one of their natural parents is outweighed by independent professional evidence from social services, doctors, police etc that the risk of harm to children from the parent's behaviour is greater.

When there is evidence that contact isn't safe it is a question of putting measures in place if at all possible to ensure that parenting is "good enough." For example a mother who is the main carer of children could be an alcoholic and binge drink at weekends. That might impair her ability to do the food shopping, care for the children at weekends or get them to school on a Monday morning. Rather than disrupt the children's sense of security more than necessary measures could be put in place so she shopped for the children's food before the weekend, the children have contact with the father over the weekend and someone else takes the children to school on a Monday morning so her parenting is good enough when the children are in her care. It's the same when determining children's contact with a father, or indeed a mother when the roles are reversed.

[TrippingDownMammaryLane]

Really scary story, I feel for you op, the obvious thing to do is to request a different officer by going above the current one who clearly harbours resentment towards you - is that possible? Someone looking at the case through a fresh pair of eyes would see the absurdity of giving unsupervised access to the man described, it would put your child at high risk. Massive good luck.

[lionessmama]

thank you all for your replies. so sorry.to.hear the stresses that others have had to go thrpugh too. at the moment i.have sent a complaint (5th.one) to cafcass and am waiting on a.response - not expecting it to.get anywhere though. we have requested cafcass officer appear at final hearing - im.just.hoping and praying the barrister i get on the day will.do a good job. the family court system needs exposing - how can an organization like cafcass get away with putting so many children and victims of abuse at risk?

[cestlavielife]

the reality is that "commitment to contact" means he turned up each and every time - did he? can you show he didn't or that he turned up abusing drugs or alcohol? was this witnessed?

past abuse to you wont count so much now as what has been happening in the contact centre. ie current and present situation with the child - unless he has beaten you up and this has been reported to police during this time....

drug and alcohol abuse - again, if not in evidence at contact centre then he will have "proved" himself. as regards the child.

if he has shown himself in good light and played the game then realistically cafcass have to recommend it moving on from contact centre.

You would need independent witness proof that somehow despite proving himself to be committed and wonderful dad at contact centre he still poses some kind of risk.
that is the reality.
cafcass can only go on what they see reported from contact centre and if he presents to them as charming nice polite that is what they see; at face value.

you need also to present as calm and controlled - don't let yourself get angry at court / at cafcass hard as it is

bear in mind judge will have seen so many he said/he did cases - they really not interested unless some kind of uptodate police report is presented. the judge will look at how contact centre went and reports of how dad behaves during contact from contact centre, did he turn up each and every time on time etc. and how he presents to cafcass. (the fact that you know its a façade is very hard for you to prove...)

so - if unsupervised given you have to go along with it but keep good records and if any major reason to suspect harm or neglect to your child report it straightaway.

[Survivor80]

Im heartbroken. We had a final hearing after cafcass section 7. My ex abused me and my kids who are now 5. 13 and nearly 16. Some of it he admitted. They gave him 1 long weekend a month and 2 daytime visits a month. However after the final hearing he left my 4 year old on a theme park so he could go on a ride. I tryed to ask him.about it but he disregarded me. I threatened to stop contact. But didnt but he took me to court and said I did. The cafcass lady this time is strong on fathers rights even if they are abusers. But I got the report back and the woman had twisted everything and lies and even made stuff up. He abused us yet she managed to turn it on me and said I am alienating my children and I had no right to threaten to stop contact. Well I'm sorry but it's not her 4 year old daughter being left to get hurt or even abducted. I feel absolute sick. She is threatening to take my girl and give her to dad. Who a used them. How is that right in any way. I'm in court in 3 days and im not sure how strong I can be. Even the judge now gets funny with me after I cryed in court because She said my ex can still take the kids to a frisnd who hurt my child

[Mumteedum]

Survivor.. You'd get more support on your own thread maybe as this is an old one? Have you tried rightsofwomen.org.uk/get-information/family-law/family-court-proceedings-can-get-advice-support/

You need some legal support urgently. X

[Laurajean89]

Hello anyone who have had a negative experience with Cafcass could you please sign my petition to stop Cafcass having final say on what happens with children because they are going against everything the children say and they are supposed to be the voice of the child they don't go with anything the children say and force contact and if parents don't force the child to go they do 14 day sentence so we need to stop Cafcass making final decision please sign and share as much as possible xx

you.38degrees.org.uk/petitions/stop-cafcass-making-final-decision-on-what-happens-with-children

[Black2407]

I'm sorry to hear what you are going through and have joined this thread because of what my brother is currently experiencing. He left his wife 2 1/2 years ago after she asked him to leave. She was very controlling and wouldn't even let him have a house key or a bank card to give you an idea, anyway back to the point they are currently going through the courts as my brother is fighting for more access to their child, the ex has not turned up to any mediation classes instead chose to go to Alton Towers on one occasion and is constantly making false allegations against my brother and my mum the paternal grandmother. on one occasion my brother turned up to collect their child as arranged and she wouldn't answer the door he told her through the door he would be waiting in the car, next thing the police are knocking on his window as they have been told he is kicking the door in trying to gain access. Now to cafcass my brother is a father that just wants to spend time with his daughter he explained this to cafcass explained how controlling and manipulative she can be and that she was forcing parent alienation and grandparent alienation. he prepared himself well went with a statement to ensure he covered everything he wanted to say along with proof her allegations are untrue and a statement from his parents about how much they miss their granddaughter and evidence of how much they were involved in her life up until the split. We have received the report from Cafcass and it is completely damning to both my brother and my mum, the Cafcass officer has only raise one of my brothers concerns which was his ex's partner smoking cannabis and the Cafcass officer has glossed over this by saying they are no longer together but she allowed my niece to be alone with this man in that environment! the report seem xtremely one sided and all of the ex's unfounded allegations have been included! to read the report you see an abusive alcoholic who she recommends has less access. My brother is completely broken and is crushed that this supposedly professional has been taken in by his Ex's lies, she insisted that the daughter was also interviewed and clearly prepped her on what she wanted the child to say. I've seen this situation from the other side (from the honest hardworking fathers who are desperate to see their children) this women is abusing the system and using the child to score points. My brother feels lost and doesn't know where to turn, he has done everything asked of him attended mediation, parent classes she has not and poles in at the last minute with her ridiculous accusations and is completely believed and sided with.

[scottyt75]

Very interesting reading, My girlfriend has just had a cafcass report done on here and it was quite frankly, disgusting.
Focused on her past (alcohol misuse, while married to a controlling abusive husband who took the kids from her)
Never bothered to come and see her or us, visit her work, family, nothing, just a cut n paste report on her past.
Giving advice to her husband to stop contact even though they are not allowed to give advice on personal circumstances.
Due back in court again soon and our solicitor has already said she wont get the outcome she wants, but will now have to fight for access.

How can cafcass do this, essentially assisting in parental alienation by giving advice to stop contact, although it could be the husband lying and just saying that, but either way cafcass dont want to know.

A joke of an organisation.

[curlykaren]

Really I just think they are shit. I never hear a good thing about CAFCASS. From either standpoint. There needs to be a better system as this one is letting down children.

[3kids1dad]

Not had dealings with carcass yet..got my 1st phone appointment next week..but in my experience, social services are no better. More interested in ticking boxes, putting on a sympathetic face then going back to their office and thinking 'oooh how can I help screw these kids up more'

[Concern]

Caffcass are disgusting people.They lie in the s7 report. They lie about what the children have said. They twist everything and also make up stuff to make a parent look bad in court. These corrupt people need to be brought to justice and sent down for their crimes of deception and fraud. They are supposed to keep children safe,but do the exact opposite. These people are fucked up and put kids in danger. They need to be stopped!!!!!!!!!!!!.

[Concern]

Why do these people (caffcass) always pick a side, usually the bad, abusive parent!!! In my opinion it’s all about the money. The parent who wants contact has to pay the court etc and usually wins , no matter what they have done. As they say, money makes the world go round.Ofcourse people in power like this, more money, more power. This encourages a parents, even bad ones knowing they will win, especially after reading posts on internet. Why do they make children suffer and ignore what a child says, not wanting to see a parent. They are just giving kids future health problems of depression and mental health issues. Is there anyone who is dealing with a caffcass officer who is deliberately ignoring the good parent and supporting the abuser?

[Concern]

Why do African men use us white ladies to stay in England by getting their papers from the home office “remane to stay”. They have babies with us but abandon us as soon as they receive their papers from the home office. Apparently this happens a lot and they get away with it. There is no follow up from the home office. They did not contact me once .

[Emz111988]

Cafcass is a joke I have been going through courts since 2011 and last one was nov 2018 Cafcass Gave out Confidential information that the father was not allowed to know and now my children and me are in grave danger he found out this Friday 29/11/2018 I'm really scared and I don't know what to do I put in a complaint to Cafcass but I feel it's too late something going to happen to me or the kids can anyone help please I'm really out of options 😢😢😢

[lionessandcub1]

Hi has anyone found an answer to this ? I have the same just been in a court battle with my ex who has lied through his teeth and fooled thecafcass lady- who has just come to court and basically advised he spends more time with our son- given that there are plenty of reasons why he shouldn’t and our son has told her things and she’s totally ignored and rules he should be seeing him more !! He already has half of every holiday and every other weekend !! I am in bits , the judge completely anialated my barrister and I am in tears

[lionessandcub1]

This message along with all the others just confirms my exact feelings and worries and the e act same has just happened to me in court- ruling our son spends more time ( already has every other weekend and half holidays !!)
The judge was completely on his side and I’m in complete bits as all I’ve ever done is protect our son - he’s ran off with another woman, she’s awful and I’ve never been allowed to meet her 2 years on!! And she’s manipulating our son and our son doesn’t want to spend more time there and now I have to break the news to him that he has to! Caf cass was awful and completely bias and rude to me when came to my home ! What can I do???

[lionessandcub1]

I have signed this however I see this is an old post. Has anyone any answers to this ???

[lionessandcub1]

Hi there I know this thread is very old now however you sound like you was in the same position as me and caf was ruled my son sees his dad more despite the fact that he has said he doesn’t want to!! And he has had terrible upset and I’ve been the one as usual who has picked up the pieces ! It’s an outrage. Poor children suffer as a result of caf cass and the judge completely ruled in his favour - I e looked after our son since he upped and left for another woman and he never wanted to know now does and is getting all he wants !! Help. X