Ds is 15 mo, has seen his dad about 10 times in total, but lately he has been loads better and he has been visiting every 4-6 weeks with some reliability (he lives in Ireland, but works in England a lot with work)
Because of Ds age and fact he hasn't seen his dad much contact has always been with me there, though I leave them to play at soft play or will hang out in the bedroom when they are in the living room etc.
Today Ds dad was visiting and it was ok, but a bit strained.
Over lunch he started shouting at me, saying that he was being pulled in all directions (he has a new gf who he lied to about having a child, and she was understandably livid when she found out he had been lying to her) He was saying fuck this and fuck that, and just basically lost the plot, saying no one knew how hard it was to be him.
Ds was in his buggy and we all went out on the street, with him still shouting. He grabbed the buggy and tried to snatch Ds away from me, shouting the whole time. I completely panicked, he wasn't in control and ds was obviously a bit freaked out by the shouting. I tried to take back the buggy and he sort of pulled it round to one side so I couldn't reach.
I swear that moment was the most horrific, I couldn't reach my son, and I was just so terrified. I said, give me Ds and took the buggy and ran home.
I know Ds dad is obviously under a lot of pressure, but ds could hear all this shouting which is completely alien to him - and honestly, I am shaking still just thinking that I couldn't reach my ds.
I've never been afraid he would take him, I've begged in the past for him to visit more, but god how do I go forward from this?
He sent me a message as if nothing had happened saying when Ds woke up from his a nap to give him a shout and he would pop round to see him again. I replied and said no, he wasn't to come to the house again today, and in response I received a message saying he was dissapointed I was withholding contact.
Seriously, what the hell happened today? Any advice? Thank you so much for reading this far
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Awful day, please help.
10 replies
sillymillyb · 26/05/2013 20:44
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