2nd GP to die in 6months

[bebemoohatessnot]

So hard to deal with deaths of family members when you're living away from home.
Paternal GM died in March 'luckily' just as I was planning to visit anyhow so I could be there for the funeral.
Now Maternal GF has died and I just won't be able to make it back to the States again.
I find it tough because while I know they're old and were 'on their way out' no one gave me head's ups letting me know that they were 'at the door' because they didn't want to 'bother' or 'worry' me and there was/is 'nothing I'd be able to do.' But this means that for me it's more of a shock. And I have less time to prepare myself. And don't get to call or say good-bye which makes it hard to grieve properly. And leaves me feeling very detached and isolated all at the same time as feeling tremendously distraught.
I did think this all through before marrying dh and moving over here. And I practically thought through the idea of people being born and dying while I'm not there and I came to terms with it as much as I could before I left...but when it happens...knowing in your mind and feeling in your heart are two so very different things.

[abroadandmisunderstood]

First off, my sincerest sympathies.

I am also abroad and I almost wait for that phonecall to say my GM (only grandparent left, and fading fast) has passed away. It's a guilt that lingers at the back of your mind - that you've left your family.

I also get very delayed information on the health of my family, or sudden illnesses. I have always had a very sickly father too, and that terrifies me on my bad days, that his heart finally gives out and I wasn't there. I haven't been able to return home since last Christmas.

I know it's not MN protocol, but here's a hug and a cuppa. I wish you all the best, and thinking of you, going through a situation I know only too well I'll experience in the near future

[chibi]

i know how you feel

my much loved grandmother died a year ago, i was 302 weeks pg so no way to go back for the funeral to say goodbye

it is a year later and we are leaving this saturday to go back for a month, one of the things i will do is visit her grave

it sounds morbid but i am really looking forward to this

it is hard being so far from your loved ones

hugs to you, i am sorry for your loss x

[chibi]

arf

32 weeks pg, it just felt like 302 weeks

[bebemoohatessnot]

Sorry to hear about your losses and anticipation of losses. Thanks for the sympathy/empathy. I'll gladly accept the cuppa

Chibi- I smiled when I saw the 302 weeks; didn't know if you were exaggerating or not

[BoffinMum]

I've had this problem with relatives overseas. The worst one was when my great uncle stopped writing and my rather hopeless and uncommunicative cousin neglected to tell us he had died. We find out some time later via the internet.

At the end of the day, they are there in your heart and that's what matters.

[bebemoohatessnot]

Thanks Boff