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what documents do I need to travel with son. Shared care, but Dad absconded 5 years ago

8 replies

aminations · 27/09/2014 11:41

It's getting harder to cross borders without a letter of permission when I travel with my son who is 14 now. When he was 9 his Dad disappeared and they haven't had any contact since then.

We were awarded shared care in 2007. Do I have to go back to court and make a new application, can I ammend the existing order, do I write to the court?

I called family court yesterday but the lady "couldn't really say".

Any help appreciated.

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thewrongmans · 27/09/2014 20:10

where do you travel to? I have different names and nationalities to my children, but I never encounter any trouble.

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aminations · 27/09/2014 21:39

We travelled to France via Eurotunnel in August. I was told at the border it would be advisable to travel with my full birth certificate as well as son's full - he has a different surname to me and we are different colours. I now would like to travel with him to Africa and have received notification from the airline that from 2015 travelling with a minor requires consent of parent not travelling.

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WellWhoKnew · 27/09/2014 23:55

Hi there,

For some bizarre reason I actually know the answer to this. Basically go back to the court to ask for 'full parental permission' down to his absconding. You will have to prove the father has not be active in the life of your son for five years by way of obtaining a Parental responsibility order

The cost of this (if you choose not to use solicitors) I think is £215. You will have to prove that the father has not been part of your lives for 5 years. Whilst this seems to ask you to 'prove' a negative, you may well be able to rely on bank transactions to show your participation in events on successive weekends etc.

You may also try to write to the father of your child (recorded delivery) at his last known address and see what that brings about.

HTH.

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queenofthepirates · 28/09/2014 00:11

Is there any mileage in changing your surname to that of your child or vice versa? I travel frequently with my DD 3yo who is admittedly the same coloured skin as me but does have my surname. I have never been asked for a birth cert or otherwise. It's just assumed she's mine and we have consent (although her father's never met her)

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aminations · 28/09/2014 22:06

Thank you for the replies. I have a recent letter from the CSA via my MP stating they have no current address for dad and that he is not a UK tax payer, and that he owes me zillions in unpaid maintenance. So I will go to the court tomorrow and spend a couple of hours form filling. I will let you know what happens.

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aminations · 14/10/2014 08:27

Went to Family Court, completed a C100. Very tricky when your situation doesn't conform to norm so documents have come back to me twice. Judge wants me to have mediator sign MIAM but have written letter back saying this is unreasonable. Two weeks down and still nitpicking because you can't fit life into tick boxes. More to come.

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TrendStopper · 22/10/2014 08:38

I can understand why airlines/border control have these rules but they are a pain. My dds dad isn't involved in her life. Hasn't seen her for years after a few years of on/off contact. I think that's it is ridiculous that his other kids get to go on holiday every year but my dd can't coz he won't provide the details that I need.

How can you prove that the NRP has no involvement in their childs life?

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aminations · 22/10/2014 12:34

When I felt like I was going round in circles, I emailed my MP, made an appointment to go and see him and when the time came told him how I felt and then we explored avenues he could help me with.

With his help, it took another year in time to get proof of "disappearance" non-involvement.

I have had one experience of being asked for documentation at a border for something I absolutely take for granted. This is my second appeal to the court for acknowledgement of my parental authority. The first time the Judge was condescending in his dismissal of me, but now time has passed and he can't ignore common sense. I am hoping.

I wonder whether one could travel with an Affidavit in which you state your situation in witness of the notary or whatever process dictates. An official looking document that states your truth.

Open a c100 here, go through it, see exactly what the courts will want from you. The court expects you to act in the best interests of your child. Your situation is not fair on your child. Submit c100 with a covering letter being clear and concise in what you need.
hmctsformfinder.justice.gov.uk/courtfinder/forms/c100-eng.pdf