Split up with partner - how to persuade him to remove his stuff?

[LunarRose]

Split with exp fortnight ago (explosively and unexpectedly). Thnkfully no joint finances or anything to sort out. Just the matter of most of his crap stuff, CDs modelling equipment music stuff. He's taken his clothes but literally nothing else.

Now the tough bit, he doesn't drive, very little money and no-one seems to be helping with the move. I don't mind having his stuff here for a while but he's not very organised and have visions of his stuff all still being here 10 years months down the line. I don't want it to turn nasty but there is a good weekend in late January when he could get it all done, how do I suggest it quite forcefully and where do I stand legally if he just doesn't bother. Ie at what point can I just get rid of the stuff.

[Thumbinnapuddingwitch]

Are you prepared to bag and box it for him? If so, then do that and tell him that it will be available for him to pick up on that weekend and he needs to get someone to come along to help him take it away; and if he decides not to bother then you will leave it outside for him to collect it at his convenience, if no one else picks it up first.

[LunarRose]

korma - how right you are... unfortunately the arsewiper used to be me

Nah seriously he's been a massive emotionally rock for me, so whilst we leant on each other a lot, it was fairly equal.

I would be prepared to bag and box. Legally am I ok to do that? just chuck his stuff after that date?

[Thumbinnapuddingwitch]

If you give him fair written and verbal advance warning, I can't see the problem. It's his stuff, you are under no obligation to house it for him - you've told him where it will be, it's up to him entirely to make sure he fetches it or secures it in some other way.

[fortyplus]

You should give him 'reasonable notice' in writing. The length of time is not specified in English Law - just what would be deemed 'reasonable'. In your case I would refer to the fact that he's already been gon a couple of weeks and specify the date by which his stuff must be gone - if it's at least 14 days from when he reads the letter that should be fine.

You need to include the words 'any items not removed by this date will be disposed of.' If you want to be firmer then you can add 'action will be taken against you to recover the cost of removal of any such items.'

But it doesn't sound as though you'd want to go the harsher route.

[MOSagain]

You need to be very careful here as if you do throw out or dispose of his possessions without him having reasonable time to collect them, then potentially you could be guilty of theft/criminal damage.

As others have said, put it in writing that you want them removed/collected and give a reasonable time to do so. If you have not heard from him by the expiration of that period I would give one further warning.

[michglas]

When I split with ex, my solicitor wrote him a letter giving him 14 days for someone else to come and get his stuff (had injunction against ex, so he couldn't do it). He was given notice that if he didn't arrange for someone else to come and get his stuff, then it would be disposed of. Nearly 3 weeks later, I loaded his stuff into his car (which was parked on the front lawn), which was off the road, and arranged for a scrapyard dealer to come and get the lot.

Do it all legally through a solicitor giving clear notice.

[Collaborate]

You can't dispose of it. There is an act do where that says you have to give notice, and that if he still fails to collect you must sell his stuff and give him the money (minus expenses). If you chuck it it's criminal damage. It's the Torts (Interference with Goods) Act 1977 .

[fortyplus]

Collaborate - you're not right. I work for my local council - we collect items left in communal areas all the time and give 2 months' notice of disposal. We're actually not allowed to sell it - everything goes to the tip where the local scrap dealers come along and take their pick

[Thumbinnapuddingwitch]

Well if that's the case, then can you bag and box his stuff and take it to where he is living now? or alternatively to his parents, if they're alive and you know where they live.
There really is no reason you should be left with his junk for longer than you're happy to have it but you may have to be proactive about getting rid of it, rather than hoping he will come and do it himself.

[MOSagain]

fortyplus so you think you working for the council trumps qualified lawyers? Collaborate is right, and as I said earlier up the thread, if the OP disposes of the items it is potentially criminal damage.

[michglas]

Does that act not only apply to landlords though who have to deal with tenants stuff once they have left. My solicitor made no mention of this Act 12 years ago, when I got rid of ex's stuff.

[prh47bridge]

No, it applies generally.

[MOSagain]