Realisation that I totally have to have a 3rd!!

[chosenone]

Logic has been overiding this underlying broodiness I have ever sincer DD was born 20 months ago! I have one of each but so what! People assume thats enough! I have a busy but child friendly career I have support from family and I have a caring and hands on DH!! However I have a 2 bed house! Thats probably the only draw back surely, even then we'd cope or extend or something surely!! I do worry that family won't be happy about babysitting 3 as they are 2 but im less inclined to try and have a Social life in my mid 30's as I was when I had DS at 29! I know it will be hard, holidays, trips out, illness etc, but I really feel inside that someones missing!! Now how the hell do I convince DH????

[notnowbernard]

Are you me?

[scorpio1]

3 is the best

[Neeerly3]

get him drunk....tis wot I did and I am due in 4 weeks!



apart from house, how big is your car? Luckily we have a 3 bed house which is quite big, so no. 3 will fit perfectly (although I am hating giving up my spare room)...however our Peugeot 206 SW could not squeeze 3 little peeps car seats in so we've had to splash out on a bigger car (I say splash, we kinda leaked £1000 on a Citroen Xsara Picasso).....I would say thats a consideration to add to your list. However if those broody hormones are shouting as they were in my case too, any kind of obstable can be overcome if you and DH are both in agreement that it's times for number 3.....

[fufflebum]

Blimey, I want three too.

Sounds like something I would have posted....

Have you spent time with people with 3 kids, looked at cost etc etc?

My Dh is not convinced about a third. We also have one of each. Was never broody after no 1 but desperate after no 2!

Although not sure whether it is because DH has said no more....

[theresonlyme]

My DH probably wanted the 3rd before I did.

[FiveGoMadInDorset]

fufflebum - weird isn't it, I wasn't convinced I wanted another one after DD but atraight after DS was going on about having a third.

[docket]

I want a third too and two bedrooms isn't putting me off!

Scorpio - why is 3 best (just so I can be sure )?

[fufflebum]

fivegomadindorset It is weird I think I was depressed /in shock after DD and ecstatic/entranced after DS (no fault of theirs hormones I think!)

I think this is what would worry me about a third in case I was depressed or disappointed or something bad....

[suwoo]

Ha, don't do it!! I am unexpectedly pg with no 3 and my body is falling to bits already!! Maybe its my age or something, but I am really feeling it. This baby better be good . We still have 2 year old DS in the bed with us so I have a lot of worries surrounding his clinginess too.

[fufflebum]

suwoo thanks for your honesty. I posted question a while back about having three kids and everyone was saying how fab and lovely it is. Interesting to hear an alternative view.

My body has been failing me since second birth and my husband says it would 'kill him' (in tiredness terms) to have another kid!

But still want another, like chosenone logic is ruling heart.

[eandh]

dh very keen on us having a 3rd, I've spent last 2 yaers saying def no more and am now swaying towards a 3 rd the 2 things that put a dampner on it are making the dd's share a room (neither the best sleepers in the world) plus my Mum and Mil have the dd's 1 day a week each whilst I work, I can't afford to give up work aqnd my Mum always said she wouldnt look after more than 2 If I could win the lottery then we'd be ttc now!!

[WinkyWinkola]

I really really want No. 3 too. Been TTC for three months but no luck yet.

But if I want 4, I'll stop after that because I can't just carry on having babies because I feel broody, can I? Or can I?

[charliesweb]

I am permenantly broody. {smile} But after no. 3 I am definately stopping. I have found him really hard work. I am so glad I had 3 but a word of warning...
I feel tired all the time (and mine are good sleepers).
Ds2 is not the placid easy going no.3 child everyone said he would be.
It is hard juggling 1 in school, 1 in preschool and a baby.
It is hard convincing anyone who is not a blood relative to look after 3 children so I always seem to have at least 1 child with me!
I went back to work for a break!!!
Good luck to any of you going for no. 3. I don't regret it but it was a lot harder work then I thought it would be.

[WinkyWinkola]

Actually you know with 3+ children, I wonder if invitations to visit other families will dry up because it's just too much chaos for them?

[fufflebum]

I know it is not the same at all. But i had two cats and then kept on and on and on and then got a third. She is adorable and lovely but she was 'a cat too far'!!!

charliesweb I have heard this before about babysitting and three kids. My mum is the only person who will look after my two so another one (when I am an only child!) seems bit unfair!

[suwoo]

I have a 7 year old, a 2 year old that doesn't sleep, SPD, varicose vein down there and a prolapse and pregnant! I do the school run, then have DS at home. I work 1.5 hours from home in the day, then I go out to work at 5, come back in at 8.30- 9. Sort DS out if DH has failed to do so. I then do more work until about 10, then go to bed in the bed with DS in it. Can you see why I wasn't exactly over the moon with number 3 on the way .

[suwoo]

Oh and I have no childcare help AT ALL. My parents live in France and the PIL are too far away.

[sorrento]

Three is much harder than you imagine and depending on the age gaps too.
Honestly suwoo you don't know you're born with a 7 year old and a 2 year old, I had 3 under 4
It's physically very hard work with little ones and then mentally hard work with school age kids, I completely burnt out and it's taken until my youngest is 4 yrs to be broody again.

[Marthasmama]

We have been discussing a third..... DD is only 16 weeks but already we have been thinking about having another one. After DS, who is now 5.5 we didn't want another baby, never. The problem is that I don't cope with pregnancy very well and had c-sections both times. The first was em sec the second was an elective section which was terrible! DH would also ideally like another one but won't let me go through the hell of pregnancy again. I just worry that when my friends have more I'll be so jealous!

[Themasterandmargaritas]

I am with charliesweb, I have 3, aged 7,5 and 21 months. The baby was the world's easiest baby....until he turned 1. I find him quite a handful now, cute of course, but tiring running between playgroup plus 2 different schools, plus after school activities, plus play dates. Mine too are good sleepers and eaters thank goodness, but sometimes i feel I don't get enough one on one time with any of them and I am fighting fires I'd like to point out also that I have help at home. Still it was me that was adamant about having a third, dh was persuaded by all the practice he would get! I guess you just have to prepare yourself for a lot of chaos and noise.

Right, I'm away to look for a job....

[suwoo]

OI Sorrento-cheeky!! Do you work at home and out of the home too with no childcare? Then come back and tell me I don't know I'm born .

[Mummyfor3]

3 is great - but gunning for No 4 !!

[BlackLetterDay]

Ooh I want a third too, luckily we have just moved from a 1 bed flat with bedroom dining room into a 3 bed house, but we were trying even before we knew we were moving.

It's bizarre but I just really want a third, had bad pnd after ds but that was really compounded by my Mum dying. We have been trying since August last year with no luck (mc at 7 weeks in september).

If I am lucky enough to concieve and carry to full term can the gods of fertility please allow me a trauma free post natal period, just 6 months please to enjoy my children, nobody dying or major relocations or huge events, thanks very much ta

Yeah right, Btw all hypothetical discussions I had with my dp, he was like "god no,no more babies" etc. When I actually said to him "I would like another baby, what do you think?" he just said yeah why not , men are odd just lay it to him straight see what he says, you might be surprised. Good luck.