Moral support please - nearly 7-yr old a reluctant reader

[Psychomumma]

I'm guess I'm looking for encouraging stories from those of you who've had children who HAVE learnt to read, though maybe later than their peers (and later than I'm comfortable with, if I'm honest ). I know the theory - and believe it, too, most of the time! - that she will take off with reading when she really wants to learn, rather than when I think she should be ready, and I'm very clear on how futile any attempt to force her into it is, having made that mistake a few times...

She's a perfectionist, doesn't like to do stuff in front of people unless she's got it down cold. She knows 85% of her letter sounds, can sound out words with consonant blends (with occasional help), can read ReadWriteInc story books Level 1/2 with a little encouragement and help - in fact, I guess she can read, but is reluctant to practise and 'work' at it to gain fluency. She sounds out almost every word, doesn't seem to remember the 'look' of many words - which I guess will come with increased exposure to them/'practise', but every now and then I get nervous and have a wobble. Please re-assure me! I'm sure many of you have had similar experiences.

[Kayteee]

Hi Phsycomumma,

I know loads of HE dc who have learned to read later than "the norm".

My ds would not look at a book when he came out of school and could barely read at all at 6yrs old. They had stressed him out so much about that it turned him right off the idea. The advice I got from other experienced Home-edders was always the same...back off, relax and wait

The turning point came when he got into an online game called World of Warcraft. It involved having to read Quests and talking (typing) to other players in the game. He was sooo desperate to play it that he, quite literally, taught himself to read. I refused to keep reading out the quests to him btw.

One day, when he was about 8 he called me and said "Mum, does that say poisonous, venomous, spider sac"?
He then proceeded to read out the whole Quest fluently

He's 9 now and reads like an adult. His spelling is brilliant too, without any formal spelling lessons, iyswim.

The other thing he adores reading are comics.

This is quite common in the HE world. Stick at it and "keep the faith".

[jabberwocky]

Have you had her checked out thoroughly for a vision processing problem? Not just being able to read the eye chart but eye tracking and comprehension. There is also something called Irlen Syndrome or Scotopic Sensitivity Syndrome that can cause children to have reading problems.

[Kayteee]

this group

is great for Autonomous Home-edders. There will definitely be people on there who's dc learned to read themselves/later than "normal" and will be happy to share their experiences.

[Roseanna123]

I have 6 kids, they all learned to read autonomously except daughter no. 2 who wanted to learn with a scheme. Daughter no. 3 is now 10 and has just learned, son no. 3 waited until 11 (which did get me nervous!) but we are in contact with so many home edders with late reading children it was fine. Each child has picked up a special book at some time - an adult one in 4 cases - and worked through it. Ds3's was the giant book of Dr. Who! We didn't teach them anything - no reading schemes, workbooks, no pen and paper exercises, nothing. One has just finished her BA, one is doing a BSc and 2 others are Open University students. Reading late didn't make any difference. Hope that reassures you!

[julienoshoes]

Well our youngest left school aged nearly nine completely unable to read or spell even her own name, she was so severely dyslexic, she had no word attack skills at all apparently.

Listening to experts, we tried every reading scheme in the book-and all caused screaming hysterics.

We were very lucky in having other autonomous home educators with much older children, to listen to and eventually we took their advice and backed off completely.

She was 13 when she finally began to 'get' reading.
The first time she read the word 'ladies' on the toilet door at the cinema we danced around in celebration!

She came on in leaps and bounds and finally read her first novel at around 14-it was Oscar Wilde's Picture of Dorian Grey. She now reads all sorts of things, classics and modern book and delights in going into book shops.

We can't get her head out of a book these days!


By 15 she had started an OU starter course and achieved all of the outcomes-which meant she was studying to University entrance level apparently.

She has been accepted by three FE colleges to do a National BTEC-equivelant to three A levels I am told.

Her going to college at 16, was something I ever dreamt would happen! I though the only option would be that she would continue with the OU. I really didn't think she would be able to manage full time in a college. I am thrilled and so is she!

This level of success has sadly not been matched by any of the children left behind in the remedial classes at school, whose SEN were not as bad as hers.

[Marjoriew]

Hello Julie, Marje here. We're still struggling with the reading. Grandson will be 10 next week. Tried everything but it's like a brick wall

[mummyrex]

I would keep on with what you are doing but relax.

7 is still very very young. What you are teaching her will ensure she knows eveything she needs to when she chooses to start using it for herself.

[chatterbocs]

Psychomumma, what is your daughters attitude? For her reading to take off you need to consolidate her phonic knowledge, all of the alphabet including the names & sounds they can make.
After when she is confident with those that she then needs to move on to blending those sounds together. E.g the next stage is intial blends, fl, cl st etc.
ELC do some magnetic letters & a magnetic board with blends (about £8)& just use the magnetic board for her to sort them. You just get three sets of the ones that she knows (that will give her confidence she is acheiving) along with a sound that she doesn't know. Get her to sort them into the corners & say each sound as she sorts.
Then once you have done this encourage her to write some words with the sounds, preferbly using the new sound.

Hope this helps.

[Sharonladskjff]

Sounds like your daughter is doing really well so far. One of my children learnt to read at around 5, another didn't really start until 13 and the third has just started to apply serious attention to reading at age 13. Both of the two older children are at college now and doing very well on their courses.