Pre-school when we intend to HE at age 5

[Marabou]

I've posted on the pre-school board as well regarding a separate issue, but that thread made me also wonder about pre-school in general..

Our DS is 3yrs3months and is going to start in pre-school in October (we're going on a holiday for the whole of September). Despite this, we intend to HE when he turns 5, as we don't feel comfortable for him to start school after his 4th birthday (he's a summer born child). Our intention is to put him in school when he'll be 6 or 7.

Now I've begun to wonder about pre-school though.. He'll be going for the 15 funded hours/week (well, I intend to have him do roughly 3-4 hours 3 days a week depending on how he'll settle in). The pre-school is lovely, but it was opened in 2012 and has been quite small up until more recently. They are going to have a qualified teacher for the 3-4-year-olds starting from this September and I really think it's mainly so they can have more kids in the "class".

They are trying to spin the qualified teacher thing as a positive thing and that it will prepare the children for Reception-class etc. However, I'm not too keen on having any formal teaching until much later and now I'm concerned how this would affect our plans to HE later on, as I've mainly planned to just do a bit of learning to read and write just to make the transition to school easier.

I would be grateful for any thoughts on this and also interested to hear if someone's been in a similar situation before.

[morethanpotatoprints]

hello Marabou

I posted on your other thread too about starting H.ed instead of pre school as it seemed like your ds would have formal lessons albeit pre school.
I wasn't aware that you were going to start school at 6 or 7 when I answered your thread.
Maybe if he is to have a formal taught education the pre school wouldn't be a bad idea, but then of course you would be taking him out of that situation to H.ed and then back to formal teaching again if this makes sense.
I'm sorry but our situation was different but someone will be a long who has experienced this, I'm sure.
Are there many children around your area that you could arrange play dates with so your ds was still getting the play and social side of things but not having to do formal learning.
None of mine went to nursery or pre school for similar reasons to you but I just made sure they mixed with other children and had friends. They went to school as normal though at 5 and 4 respectively.

[Saracen]

So, were you hoping to send your son to preschool so he could do some playing and crafts etc and you are now unsure whether he'll get that without too much academic focus at the one you've chosen?

It's tricky. I was trying to do something similar when my older daughter was that age. I looked at a number of preschools in the area and found most of them too formal. We found one that was OKish, with lovely warm staff, but even that one turned out to be rather more regimented than I'd been led to believe. For various reasons, my daughter decided within a few weeks to stop going.

Many parents who plan to HE do send their kids to preschool first, and many don't. It's entirely down to what you think would suit your son. One great benefit of knowing that you will be home educating is that you can play it by ear. Several of the children at my dd's nursery were visibly distressed about going in, but I think their parents felt they had to press on with it regardless in order to get their children "school-ready" for the following year.

As morethan says, if preschool doesn't feel like a good fit then there may be other ways you can provide for your son's needs: playing with other kids (HE or not), toddler gym and music, crafts sessions etc.

[Marabou]

Hello morethanpotatoprints and thanks for taking the time to reply to these threads :) . Yes, I didn't think to mention starting school when our DS is a bit older in the other thread. As I mentioned, we're planning to home educate for the first few years after DS turns 5 and then let him go to school, mainly because I would hope to work outside the home at one point doing something a bit closer to what I studied.

Saracen, what you have said describes my intentions exactly. I had been hoping to put DS in a nursery for the funded 15 hours mainly because he craves the social interaction with other kids. We go somewhere to play nearly every day and DS has regular contact with children of different ages from toddlers and babies to 9-10-year-olds so that's not really an issue. I must admit I'm also a bit "selfish" in that I'm quite looking forward to having a few uninterrupted hours of work time for myself during the day.

However, it is like you say, I am concerned about having too much academic focus at such an early stage.. It just seems ridiculous that there seems to be such a rush to get kids into a "mould" from such a young age these days . Well, I guess we'll try it and if it doesn't work out and DS gets unsettled and distressed in any way, we'll just pull him out and carry on as we've been up until now :)

[Pootopolitics]

This is almost exactly the question I was going to ask. Dc1 gets free nursery hours next year and I keep changing my mind on what we will do. On the plus side, encouraging independence and (I imagine) lots of learning through play. On the negative... I'm not sure really but some part of me just has doubts, but that might be the selfish part of me that doesn't want people to tell him he wants to go to school...

[Pootopolitics]

Dammit my re name change hasn't worked! Curse you, user settings! I haven't written anything too radical in my political thread, thankfully...

[Saracen]

Poo, if your main concern is people at nursery telling your child he wants to go to school, perhaps you could counterbalance that by taking him to play with HE children sometimes and perhaps going to Hesfes. When my older daughter was coming up to Reception age she was quite conscious of all the things she would have to give up if she went to school, such as the home ed museum trips and swimming sessions and seeing her existing (HE) friends.

[Lelivre]

I'm a few months ahead of you. My dd has had six months of preschool. I haven't found much in the way of formal learning, there is lots of play, stories and crafts. You may find they do more free play in the afternoons (or morning) and you can schedule your sessions accordingly.

I feel that any literacy or numeracy should be child led at this age or it could do more harm than good, but my observations are that any phonics or number work has been very play based, no sitting down with work sheets or a board. The preschool know that I may HE (I will!) and they are very respectful.

If you are considering school later on I think it is a good idea. I was schooled then home educated for a few years and then again went into school; it can be a difficult transition. It is not just making friends and fitting in but also having to get used to the institution that is school when you are accustomed to operating so differently, so freely.

Putting my daughter into preschool has helped me to decide that HE is the path to take. I enjoyed school and I enjoyed HE I wanted to see what might best suit her.

[Marabou]

Lelivre thank you, that's very helpful, thank you for your insight!

I'm not sure how well I would be able to plan the sessions according to what activities they do in the morning and afternoon. At the moment, the morning sessions are full, so my my DS will be going in the afternoon sessions. This suits us well, as we tend to sleep in and I think DS would just be a grump if he had to wake up at 7am . Looking at the schedule, it appears they do largely similar things both in the mornings and afternoons.

It is not just making friends and fitting in but also having to get used to the institution that is school when you are accustomed to operating so differently, so freely. This is what I've really been wondering about lately. I vividly remember writing in one of my essays in secondary school (no idea what the question was), that I thought one of the most important lessons school could teach was that not everything is fun. Sounds quite sad now that I think of it, but I have been thinking about the whole aspect of school being such an institution with routines and tests and sitting down for hours on end and listening etc. and how that will fit in with kids, who are not used to it..

[Lelivre]

Our nursery would definitely let summer born children stay an extra year. The funding potentially can continue until the child is 5. It could make it difficult to find a place at your preferred. But if you were going to defer school until 6/7 that would be an issue anyway.

You could get involved with local groups (HE ones or community sports, gym, dance, forest school etc) to keep group work part of your home ed life. Or you could seek out flexischool opportunities, but this may be at odds with what you want for your ds in his early years as (unfortunately!) from y1 more and more formal learning is introduced.

[tricot39]

Just a thought..... Will your preferred school have a place when you want it. Around our way some schools just dont have spare places and if families who move into area have had to wait 2 years plus to.get in. Speak to your lea and local school to get an idea of the local position. Good luck

[tricot39]

Just a thought..... Will your preferred school have a place when you want it. Around our way some schools just dont have spare places and if families who move into area have had to wait 2 years plus to.get in. Speak to your lea and local school to get an idea of the local position. Good luck