12 month old DS howling when left at nursery - how long will this last?

[smittenkitten]

my DP is going back to work next week and has been doing settling in at DS's nursery with him. it is a lovely nursery we are both happy with it and his main carer seems nice and affectionate. But he HOWLs when DP leaves him, clinging to her and trying to follow her. Nursery assure us that he's fine after she's gone, but obviously it's v traumatic for her to have to go through this every day. Did you go through this with your DCs and if so, how long was it before they were OK to be left? thanks

[moodlesoup]

hi, my DD1 has been going to nursery just one day a week since march. for the first few weeks she howled. then she stopped, now she's started again. i find that the longer i stay in her eyesight the worse she gets, so i tend to be swift. i also wait at the front door where she can't see me to make sure she stops once i've gone. sometimes she does, sometimes she doesn't.
i don't think there's any rhyme or reason, just that she'd rather be with me if she has the chance to think about it, but once she's spent a bit of time there she's happy as larry. its horrible though and i do feel for you. not a nice way to start the day, but i try and think that lots of people have to do it and its not cruel.
hope it gets easier.

[Toothyboy]

Yep, ds2 is 15 months and does this when I leave him at my mum's. Last week, I only went into the next room to say goodbye to ds1, ds2 thought I'd left the house and stopped bawling 10 seconds later! Not too young to try and manipulate you imho !

[Kewcumber]

luckily my DS has only done this a few times with my Cm when we started. It is horrible. However I used to hover outside the front door and he always stopped crying within about a minute (at most). Is there a way a peeking through a window to satify herself that he's OK really?

[emkana]

I'm sorry but I hate little babies being called manipulative.

They are NOT.

[Kewcumber]

Eleusis made me laugh when I was sad that he's cried when I left him there - she said it wasn;t as sad as when her daughter cried at teh end of the day becasue she'd arrived to pick her up , so be careful what you wish for...

[wrinklytum]

ds goes 2 days from being six months old.He did this for about 2 weeks.Then he settled down.I found it easiest to give a quick kiss and cuddle then depart rapidly with tears in my eyes so as not to prolong the agony.He was fine after I had gone!!!!dd is a funny little soul and only goes 1 day a week from 12 months and cries when we pick her up!!!!

Kids eh?

I am sure he will be fine soon when he has adjusted to it,but it is upsetting when they are crying.

[Twinklemegan]

Wrinklytum - my DS has taken to crying when we pick him up from nursery as well. He just goes one day a week. He particularly seems to cry when I hold him - he's fine with DH . I've often wondered whether it's because we take him by surprise. I don't think he's crying with relief because he seems to really like it.

The last twice DS has cried when DH has dropped him off but I think both times he had fallen asleep in the car so it was tiredness we think.

[Toothyboy]

I apologise if my use of the word manipulative has offended anyone. I accept that it implies more than I think I intended it too. I agree that small babies should never be thought of as manipulative - it's just not possible. I was referring more to my own ds2 who is 15 months, and may be physically small, but is a very knowing and boisterous toddler!
Apologies again .