Work insisting in a handbook that I tell them before 12th week of pregnancy that I'm pregnant

[Lauriefairycake]

I don't want to tell them as I have had miscarriages around the twelfth week (before and after) - in fact I don't want to tell anyone until the 20th week.

I'm a student nurse and they've given us all a handbook that states you can tell them no later than the twelfth week.

Do I really have to ??

[deenymcqueenygoreandguts]

yes....health and safety....
moving and handling, you need to have them look after you.
i understand what you are saying about your previous miscarriage, i was in the same situation BUT dont put yourself at risk as you will be expected to carry on lifting etc.

unless you are off for the next 4-6 weeks??? In uni or annual leave perhaps??

[newy]

I'm a nurse and actually told them at 9 weeks because there was a patient with meningitis and children would come in with chicken pox. You don't have to make it common knowledge, perhaps just tell the sister and explain your situation. They will also understand if you need to take time off/have morning sickness etc.
Good luck!

[Lauriefairycake]

Not pregnant yet, planning on ttc-ing this month.

I've had 4 miscarriages so I'm very very reluctant - have a placement starting in february but it's all hypothetical.

I'm not sure they can legally enforce this - surely statute law trumps this ? Noone has to tell anyone until the 8th month of pregnancy.

Apparently they are really funny with women who get pregnant on my course

[Lauriefairycake]

Apparently I have to have a meeting with my course leader, placement tutor, hospital mentor so too many people would know for my liking. I won't be around children, it's a mental health unit

Thanks you two for your responses

[newy]

I haven't heard of this rule but its probably not enforceable because you would have patient confidentiality from GP and some women don't find out before 12 weeks anyway. If that's really what you want to do, then I can't see what they can do - sack you? They would be brave to do that. As for being funny about it, just remember that the law and right is on your side so make sure you know your rights and contact ~RCN if necessary. I think they are less likely to give you a hard time if it might backfire on them.

[deenymcqueenygoreandguts]

Well its entirely your choice,
personally as a manager i would take issue with some one on my ward taking risks with moving and handling and with infection especially some one as high risk as yourself.
you are precious, i would want to look after you and help you out as much as i can, you are not allowing this by keeping it to yourself.
i dont think that it is a principle thing is it with you, i think its a "tempting fate" issue and wanting to not go through that agony of having to tell every one and every thing that goes with losing a baby.

[deenymcqueenygoreandguts]

It does seem alot of people to involve in some thing so personal, but thats the nature of the job is it not? there are allot of people responsible for you and you in turn surely have a moral obligation to let them know?

[Hulababy]

Can't understand why it has to involve so many people.

However I have a similar rule in my job. I work in a male prison and I have to tell work asap if I become pregnant, H&S reasons.

[flowerybeanbag]

You must tell your employer no later than the end of the 15th week before your due date, ie no later than 25 weeks pregnant, so 8 months is not correct anyway.

I'm not sure they could enforce this rule but I would strongly advise you to tell them as soon as possible. You can ask for it to be kept confidential, but in your job there are likely to be risks involved and the first 12 weeks are a time when minimising risks is perhaps even more important than later on. Please tell your manager at least and allow him/her to look after you and ensure you don't put yourself and your baby at more risk than is strictly necessary.

I do understand your reluctance in your situation, believe me, but their request to know sooner than is strictly required by law is there for a reason.

[Lauriefairycake]

Thanks all for that, yes deenymcqueeny you are right that it isn't a principle thing with me but I don't want to tell anyone in case I miscarry again.

I certainly don't feel a moral obligation to tell them - one of the much younger members of the course (only 20) was pregnant and she had to leave because they were so judgemental and obstructive - they'd allocated her a hospital placement two hours from the college and were very dismissive of her concerns at doing a 4 hour commute on top of her shift. One of the tutors was also very rude to her and asked her if 'she was really planning on keeping it'

I have no intention of that happening to me - in general I have found the tutors pretty rude and patronising to the younger female students. Actually have a lot worse incidents than that but don't want to bore you.

I'm 35 and I realise that I am solely responsible for my life and will be taking great care of myself when pregnant

I would certainly be telling my nurse manager as soon as I had a problem - it's the college I would want to put off telling.