Should I talk to the teacher about DS being left out of dress rehearsal?

[coribells]

DS in nursery, two mornings a week he attends a special group which aims to help some children with there social skills. I picked him up this morning, and he was very upset, crying etc, because he had to attend the 'rainbow group' and missed out on dressing up as a snowflake for the dress rehersal of the infant school play. He has been down all afternoon and has said he wants to go back to his old preschool.
I dont think I want my son excluded from class activities to attend this group, especially if its going to upset him. I have never had to talk to a teacher before about anything really, What should I say?

[jinglinggoblin]

do you mean he would normally have gone to the rainbow group anyway so nothing changed, or that he was sent to the rainbow group specifically so he missed it? if it was that he would normally there, i would tell the teacher how upset he was and mention that you would rather he missed the group for the dress rehearsal. if he was sent there when he usually wouldnt i would be v annoyed and would make sure teacher knew it

[coribells]

He normally goes to the rainbow group on Tuesday and Wednesday. So he had to miss the dress rehersal today because of this. He saw all his friends getting dressed up and he didnt so got upset about it.

[nzshar]

Hey there coribells,

Sorry no real advice Just that it seems strange that this rainbow group is supposed to be helping with social skills, and yet they didnt seem to think that making sure your DS felt 'part' of his normal class by participating in the dress rehersal

[jinglinggoblin]

i can totally understand why he would get upset about it. i also understand why the teacher didnt want to break the routine but i think it is very unfair for him to miss something so special. i would tell her he was upset and ask that in future he goes to the rehersal - and mention that you are happy for him to miss the group if anything else special comes up which you havent foreseen.

dont worry about talking to teachers, i do it all the time. they see your child almost as much as you do when they are at school full time, its very important that you can communicate with them. just catch them after class, you dont have to make an appointment or anything

[Blandmum]

They might have been working on the idea that an upset in his routine might have 'thrown' him. Changes in routine always upset my ds IYSWIM.

Have a quiet word

[coribells]

nszhar, thats what I thought.
DS is a shy child, so making him feel 'different' to the other children is only going to make things worse.
The play is on next week, so there wont be any more rehersals but I would like to ensure if there are entire class activities that he is included in these.