Concerned about 8yo dd

[m0therofdragons]

My eldest dd has always been very black and white with information she's told so at the age of 3.5 she refused an ice cream on a day out at the beach because it "would make her fat". (Nursery taught healthy eating the week before). She would turn down cake and choose fruit, never ask for snacks and overall has little interest in food. She goes in phases of eating well and then showing control over food and it's hard to explain but dh and I have occasionally been a bit concerned at how little she eats and her general anxiety but don't make a big issue.

She's now 8 and since the school holidays began it feels like it's worse. She's officially underweight but is a slim build. Her waist is less than her 5yo sister.
I may be totally barking up the wrong tree. I don't think it's about her body image as such as she's a bit young for that but it does feel like a control thing in herself? I have no idea what I should be looking for of if I'm totally wrong.
She's 131cm and weighs 3stone 7lbs.
Any thoughts would be much appreciated

[m0therofdragons]

Anybody?

[MillicentKing]

I just put her stats into BMI calculator (putting Birthday as 3/7/08) and if she was 3lb heavier she'd be a healthy weight. On the low side, but you say she's slim so that sounds about right.

How does she feel about you weighing her and doing her height? We only do height when it's theme park time, and I have no idea what my 7 yo son weighs. I'm asking because I wonder whether she is aware of your concern.

Having a waist the same size as her younger sister wouldn't concern me at all. They may be different builds, and at 5 many children haven't started the 'grow taller but not wider' stage yet. Both my kids had shorts that fitted them from age 4 to 8 - I think they just don't get wider at that age!

Some people really aren't interested in food, they eat when they're hungry.

My inclination would be to do nothing at this stage. IF there is an issue it you will soon be aware, but if there isn't then you don't want to risk making one (though you sound very sensitive to it).

[MillicentKing]

nb the shorts did look rather ridiculous by the time we got rid of them!

[m0therofdragons]

I rarely weigh her and usually I say it's car seat related as most of her friends are not using car seats. I definitely don't make an issue of it but others do - her swim suit is baggy although I just got a new one that's less obvious.
I just wondered really if anyone who is going through ed with a dc had certain clues beforehand really in the hope I can head it off or support in a helpful way.

[Missgraeme]

Maybe get her interested in cooking /baking at home? All the smells and tastes might make her have a healthier opinion of food!! As in want to stuff her face with cakes and realises she won't spontaneously combust if she eats something sinful!!

[m0therofdragons]

We do lots of baking and she likes cakes but won't eat much at a time. Always eats dinner, never asks for seconds, so I've upped her portion size which is working. Last few days she's been much more settled.