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Conception

can you really TTC without becoming obsessed by it all???

19 replies

sparklyshoos · 14/03/2008 21:53

DS has just turned 1, we thought we'd be pg again by now, but turns out sleep deprivation is a great contraception , as well as the fact that I BF for a year and only just had 2nd AF.

So, now DS is finally starting to sleep through , we're thinking about when to start TTC and I'm already getting obsessed, counting... if we do it this month, baby will be due xxx etc.

Is it ever really possible to TTC without the counting game? We got pg 1st month with DS, so I can't imagine how obsessed I'll get this time if it's 6mo plus, esp now the BD doesn't happen as often. I'd really love to get pg just because it just happens as a result of a good, romantic night, rather than knowing it's hot spot time, so have to BD tonight.

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Yorky · 14/03/2008 22:02

Ditto! DS is nearly 14mo now and I would love him to be a big brother before he's 2, am not obsessing about it to the extent that I call DH at work saying come home I'm ovulating - does anyone do that in RL? but I know roughly when is good. Tried temping but doesn't work as I am woken by DS and can't leave him crying for 2 mins while I eat the thermometer! Haven't got organised to using ov sticks yet. Good luck

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gigglewitch · 14/03/2008 22:04

I think stressing and counting is pretty much compulsory if your DC are planned, it's all part of the malarkey, esp as in our case DS2 took a year to become more than a twinkle in daddy's eye after (like you) DS1 took one shag a week before our wedding lol

Good luck, counting is ok, just try not to get too stressed out over it.

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sparklyshoos · 14/03/2008 22:06

Well I was a bit wet behind the ears till I came on here, I knew nothing about temping or ov sticks, and am trying to keep it that way as I'd just be so OTT!!! The very few times we did it before I'd started with AF again, I was out 10 days later buying the pg tests. I'm almost hoping AF stays a bit unpredictable, so that i can't plan too much and hopefully leave it to chance!

Hopefully see you on antenatal thread before too long, fingers crossed.

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sparklyshoos · 14/03/2008 22:09

x-posted GW, that's my worry, I keep reading on here how it takes so long 2nd time around, we've got no chance we get down to business so infrequently .

we've decided saturday night will be the night for lurrve, if we haven't yet managed it that week!

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gigglewitch · 14/03/2008 22:20

lol @ shagsaturday

ours was sunday morning
Probably easy to see why it took a year... resorted to ov sticks and hosp treatment by the end!! Will shut up now or I'll say faaaaarrr too much. Go 'n get some wine or something and enjoy your evening - ya never know you might make Fri and sat this week

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Hopeysgirlwasntbig · 14/03/2008 22:21

no!

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beaniesteve · 14/03/2008 22:22

the only time you can ever be relaxed about it is when you'r not expecting it to happen.

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sparklyshoos · 14/03/2008 22:24

I have started drinking again now - wouldn't do it whilst BF and all night cafe open, so am hoping things will improve...I suppose I should add in a mid-week special to raise the odds!

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sparklyshoos · 14/03/2008 22:25

and when I think of the first few months after having DS, if I'd known it was going to take me a year to get AF back!

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CantSleepWontSleep · 14/03/2008 22:26

Yes second time around, but not first.

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jaype · 14/03/2008 22:50

Ha! "Yes second time around, but not first."

If only. The only time you don't get obsessed is if they come along first time you try. My first two were easy peasy but number 3 has been 3 months now and nothing. Have already resorted to the wee sticks, but guess I'm just paying the price for being an old(er) biddy this time.

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blueshoes · 14/03/2008 22:55

2nd time round, I was much more relaxed, though still got excited around AF time. Just the logistics of having a child meant no time to take temps, chart, tricky logistics of doing the deed. I always have a huge stash of cheap pregnancy tests ...

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jaype · 15/03/2008 09:01

MAybe that's it - first was an accident, with ttc d I was really nervous as ds was a rubbish sleeper and I was really worried about how I would cope with another. This time I know it would all be fine and am really looking forward to it. Hence the fact that the b*gger won't happen!!! It's so typical.

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CantSleepWontSleep · 15/03/2008 09:36

3 months is hardly a long time Jaype.

Took over 4 years first time, and 14 months this time, but I wasn't obsessed at all.

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TrinityfeelslikeahopelessRhino · 15/03/2008 09:38

I have never worked out when I was due to ovulate or anytrhing and have no idea what they are talking about on the ttc threads so no, I didn't get at all obsessed when ttc dd2
It took 13 months and I just waited for my period NOT to come, easy really

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BigTeuchLittleTeuch · 15/03/2008 09:57

For me? No...

I am too much of a control freak Had I not read so much about how tricky conceiving can be, I would have tried in blissful ignorance, but since I have that information I now need more about how my own body works in order to feel I am giving it the best go I can...

I am also very, very impatient. We are on cycle..erm...5 or 6 ttc DC2.

But everyone is different. I sometimes think that if you conceived very quickly first time, you are more likely to be stressed when it doesn't happen immediately.

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ILikeToMoveItMoveIt · 15/03/2008 10:09

When we decided to ttc number 2, dp had a lovely romantic notion that it would happen all by itself.

I had other ideas as I knew there were ways we could optimise our chances of conceiving. So, I read a copy of Taking Charge of Your Fertility and I made sure I knew what my ov signs were. I charted straight away, but didn't make a big thing of it and wasn't in dp's face about it.

Luckily we conceived the first month so I didn't have time to obsess about it

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jaype · 15/03/2008 20:28

I know, apologies cantsleep. It's no time at all and I have many friends for whom it's taken months/years - my dp took 8 years (!) to come along, so my MIL thinks quite rightly that it's highly amusing that I'm stressing... BigTeuch is right though - my problem is that my job involves looking at various reports on infertility rates , IVF etc, so I've just freaked myself out. Ah well, glass of wine, deep breath and relax. It'll happen when it does.

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soosy · 15/03/2008 22:13

As Jaype says it depends how long you have to wait before you get a BFP, if it is two months, then probably not, but if like Jaype or myself it has taken years and in my case with fertility treatment in double figures then ttc does sort of take over your life and become v stressful.

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