Should I complain?

[DearDinah]

Just looking for a bit of perspective about whether to make a complaint about my birth experience.
My baby was breech so I was due an ELCS, they booked it 2 days before my DD saying that was the only slot available but any sign of labour I was to go in straight away for EMCS.
2 days before ELCS, my waters broke at 1.30 in the morning, pains weren't too bad but we called hospital & they said to make our way in.
Sat in waiting room & pains start revving up, lose more waters. Wait 30 mins then called through.
Midwife asks if she thinks baby has turned, said everyone would be so happy if she had as they had a nightmare night with lots of surgery.
A consultant scans me to find baby still breech, both her & midwife put on sad faces!
Taken back to room & told they might not be able to get me in that night due to being short staffed but they would find out.
Left in room until 4.30, pains getting worse.
Consultant comes back to say sorry no staff with perform EMCS in the morning & I would be admitted to maternity ward overnight. No mention of pain relief at this point. She proceeds to put cannula in my arm, wearing no gloves. Husband said blood spurted everywhere (I couldn't watch it go in!) taken up to ward, husband told to go home at the door & come back at 8am.
I'm taken to a silent ward, lots of sleeping ladies, given two codeine & put to bed.
I laboured through the rest of the night, biting my own fists, trying to be as quiet as I could so as not to wake the lady next to me (I'm too polite for my own good!) times my own contractions on my phone & breathed best I could through them.
No one checked on me.
I know I should have made more of a fuss perhaps, but being my first, I was frightened & worried I was being too much of a wimp. That this was just what had to happen.
Got to 8am, husband let on ward, I was given two more codeine, but left in bed till husband demanded someone come get me. I was in agony.
Eventually wheeled down to labour ward at 9.30 ish.
Told to sick on gas & air by a midwife. I said I needed to poo! She got worried and called a doctor to examine me, I was 6cms.
Everyone seemed to come out of woodwork at this point & got me down to surgery, I was contracting quite hard on the table. The midwife whispered in my ear, please don't have a breech birth today...
Anaesthetist was shouting at everyone, everyone didn't seem to know what anyone else was doing, he was shouting 'wheres the surgeon' I was so upset, I actually asked them not to fall out with each other! The midwife told me it's always like that! She told my husband to go in, then the anaesthetist shouted at him & told him to get out! When the surgeon arrived, chaos calmed down, husband was let through & my daughter was delivered at 10.30.
We were taken through to recovery, followed by the anaesthetist still shouting at the midwife, there was some confusion over who signs what off, they continued to argue while we were trying to enjoy our baby.
There's so much more also, the midwives on the maternity ward being exceptionally rude, never seeing the same one twice, my daughter needed to stay in a week for invasive tests. I was very upset, and told by more than one, it was pointless getting upset. They said they weren't used to having someone on the ward so long, made me feel an inconvenience.
Just a dreadful experience, but I'm sure others have had worse.
I'm angry & sad, not sure whether complaining would help, but surely they need to sort their staffing issues out?

[OwlCapone]

Rather than complain, can you ask for a "debrief" to go through what happened? It might get everything straight in your head and you can then decide if it warrants a complaint. the problem with staffing on a maternity ward is that there is no control over how many women go into labour at one time and how many are going to need surgery or other intervention.

And lastly, congratulations on your DD. :)

[Happydutchmummy]

I work for the nhs and I think complaints are a good thing. If you don't let the hospital know where you felt they went wrong then no one can fix it and others may go through the same thing as you. So although putting in a complaint won't change your experience, it will potentially change the experience for those who follow after you. Written complaints are taken very seriously. It may be that they need to fix staffing levels, or have a chat with staff on the ward to ensure patients are treated with emotional kindness as well as the physical care at a very distressing time.

(equally I say when you encounter lovely treatment in the nhs take time to write a quick thank you note as its wonderful to hear that all our hard work is making a positive difference)

[lucidlady]

I am going through the debrief process at the moment. As part of this we're going through my notes to check for discrepancies between what's been written and what I remember. If at the end of the debrief I don't think it's been addressed properly then I can move to formal complaint.

I think you should definitely do something as this will just eat away at you otherwise. Good luck.

[DearDinah]

Thank you, happy I actually wrote a thank you card with quite an emotional message of thanks after my 12 week scan, I had it on the day my MIL passed away, they rallied round to get my through real quick so I could get back to her with the scan picture. I thought they were wonderful on the ANDU.