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Infant feeding

Why is my dd "reverse cycling" even though I am still here all day?

16 replies

Caz10 · 26/05/2008 20:30

I had been warned this might be an issue when I went back to work, but I am still off, and DD (5.5mths) is becoming a nightmare to feed during the day and feeding every 2hrs at night. During the last few days she has stopped even asking for food during the day, I am just trying to feed her every 2-3hrs but she gets really angry, has a tiny feed and then refuses. Day time nappies are getting drier and drier, night time nappies heavier and heavier (and me tireder and tireder!)

Anyone know why she would do this, and how we can get her back to feeding more often during the day?

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peggotty · 26/05/2008 20:40

Caz, my 4 month old ds has just started to do this, getting really distracted etc during day feeds and then waking more at night to make up for it - it's a bloody nightmare, isn't it?! He has just developed yet another cold (about his 5th since being born) so on top of the distraction he has fed even less than normal today as he's so snotty and only wants to feed from my left boob!!! I am going to be up all night tonight with him I would guess! I read somewhere ( can't remember where, might have been kellymom) that this behaviour can last til about 7 months. I don't have the issue of returning to work to deal with as am SAHM. I know they say weaning doesn't necessarily help with night-waking, but I bet you're dying to give it a go (at least you've only got a couple of weeks to wait, unlike my 2 whole months)?! I think that today my ds wouldn't have bothered feeding at all if I hadn't shoved my boob in his face. Anyway, I'm sorry I've not offered any advice but just want to commiserate as I'm in the same boat as you!

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gagarin · 26/05/2008 20:45

Life is too interesting during the day? Loads to look at; noises etc?

Have you tried drawing the curtains and retiring to wherever she gets fed at night to mimic the boredom/relaxation of night feeds?

Just a thought - it may help

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Caz10 · 26/05/2008 21:06

Thanks!

Yes I've given up trying to watch telly/MN/whatever when feeding, which makes it even more depressing! I sit on the bed, where I would at night, and close the blinds but she still pretty much refuses. It's a nice wee rest though...today fed her lying down before her naps, and then napped along with her which was nice, but as a result haven't left the house which isn't an on-going solution!

pegotty a bloody nightmare sums it right up!! and you're right I'm desperate to try food...2wks to go...

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peggotty · 26/05/2008 21:15

I find the feed-them-in-a-dark-room thing only works sometimes. I do think my ds has an incredibly nosy/curious personality which is obviously making the whole distracted while feeding issue worse! What's your little girl like, caz? Just wondering if it's a personality thing, as I'm sure not ALL babies go through this. My ds is a bit of a whinge-bag in the house, he gets bored and is only really happy when out and about, but of course this means he hardly has a decent feed all day - hence i'm stuck between a rock and a hard place - stay in more with whinging baby to make him feed more or go out with happy baby who is so busy rubber-necking that he doesn't feed!! Will you post back after you've started weaning to say if you see any difference? (hopeful emoticon!)

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Caz10 · 26/05/2008 21:21

absolutely!!

Yes, I think she is very similar - when she was smaller if I had a tenner for every time someone said "oh she's very alert" I'd be rich! Now people just call her nosey! I'm sure her neck is made of rubber, her head spins this way and that so often and so easiy! NOTHING happens that she doesn't clock, people coming in and out, dog moving, cars outside etc etc..right down to the shadow on our bedroom wall today that were so amazing to watch she couldn't eat...!

I go to a BF group, there are lots of babies and toddlers there, v noisy etc. I watched the 2 other 4/5mth babies feeding last time, they just lay there peacefully like newborns, while dd jumped around to look at everyone, bobbing on and off, chatting/shouting etc...

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peggotty · 26/05/2008 21:32

Ah, so it could well be simply down to personality then!? I'm hoping that a combination of weaning and just getting used to noise/action going on around him will cure my ds of this! It's really really hard to bf discreetly with him flinging himself on and off my boobs - although I have to admit it's really cute when he gets distracted by me and just looks up to give me a big smile. I managed to feed him in a sling today while out and it was relatively successful, even though he did latch on and off loads, he couldn't do quite as much nosying as the sling was restricting his view!

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anonymxxx · 26/05/2008 22:26

Hi Caz,

I'm Glimmer and we have talked before. DS had his around 4.5 months when I returned to work and I thought I wouldn't be able to hold it together. Somehow I did and the phase passed without me doing anything.

He is now back to feeding every 4h at night and at the moment I go with it. I started co-sleeping with is working for us.

Maybe give it another two weeks and reassess?! It might just pass...

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Caz10 · 27/05/2008 21:04

Thanks all!

It's very tiring, but I'm hoping like you say anonymxxx that it will pass.

I don't sleep v well when we co-sleep, but I have found I feeding her lying down during the day, at a time when she is getting sleepy is quite good

  • she has a bigger feed
  • she has a longer nap
  • i nap with her!

    pegotty that might be worth a try for you?
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Eelpie · 27/05/2008 21:07

Yes it will pass. 4 - 6 m was an odd time. Just when you have the hang of things they go and get hungry or are teething or are just plain nosey DD took a few months of solids before really sttling back down but we armed ourselves with:

Calpol for teething.
A good book/comedy on SKY+ for all nighters.
Medised for the end of the tether!

I would in retrospect co-sleep - DP still would not but we at least have a spare bed for next time

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PhDlifeNeedsaNewLife · 27/05/2008 21:08

Caz, my ds did this at 4.5m - it began when he had his jabs, for some reason, probably because I was a wreck at the time. (I do NOT cope with needles!)

The thing that worked for me was, catching him when he napped - either stuffing the nipple in just as he was going off to sleep, or just waking up - eventually he got the hang of day feeds again. The LLL leader who gave me that tip also said, it takes as long to correct as it took them to get into the habit - in our case, a fortnight!

(After that, we had to deal with him thinking he could ONLY feed lying down on the bed, but that was a whole other story...!)

good luck!

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Caz10 · 28/05/2008 20:20

Thanks all, well we're less than 2 weeks away from 6mths, maybe things will pick up...

yes, the no spare bed is a problem isn't it?!!

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peggotty · 30/05/2008 10:02

Hi Caz, would love to nap when ds naps but I also have a 3 year old dd who would be a bit pissed off about that . It's good to read others experiences of this and that it DOES pass. I discovered my ds' first tooth yesterday which might actually explain some of his behaviour. The nighttime waking had reached a peak and then yesterday I saw the very edge of a tooth! Last night he went to bed with a dose of ibuprofen and again at 3.30am after he's woken half an hour after a feed and then he slept til 7.15 so definate improvement. He's had sod all milk today so far though!

I can't do co-sleeping either - it's no-sleeping for me.

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ILikeToMoveItMoveIt · 30/05/2008 10:12

DS started to do this at about 5 months, I tried lots of different tricks to get him to pay attention and feed, but tbh I think it was just a phase that passed.

The only thing that seemed to get more milk in him was to feed him when he was getting sleepy. He would feed for longer, drop off to sleep, then I'd put him in his cot when he let go of my nipple on his own accord. I didn't make a rod for my own back doing this either, so don't worry about that!

Peggotty - I'm so glad to hear you are still bf'ing

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peggotty · 30/05/2008 20:11

Iliketomoveit - thanks I can't quite believe that I am still bfing! Have no plans to give up either! Hope you are ok.

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Caz10 · 30/05/2008 20:49

D'oh pegotty, sorry, it must be really irritating when people suggest that!! So glad this is my PFB and only the dog who gets pissed off when I take to my bed at 2pm! Hats off to you, I'm terrified of the tiredness with no.2...

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ILikeToMoveItMoveIt · 31/05/2008 11:52

Ladies - I have thought of another trick for a distracted baby. Wear a longish beaded necklace. They can feed and fiddle (taking their concentration away from their surroundings) at the same time.

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