"milk was too weak"

[suzi2]

Just wanted a rant really... a relative switched to formula, rather reluctantly I believe, at day 3 due to post birth complications. Anyway, the babys gran said to me today "he's so settled on the formula now, we've all agreed that her milk must have been weak and that's why he was grumpy". And her MW and HV have reinforce this belief I think.

I really wish the NHS would switch one of those "breast is best" posters all over the hospital with a "myths about breastfeeding" one. I'm so saddened that although things were going well with the feeding, she is now being swayed to believe that there was something wrong with her milk. And I bet that affects her decision to breastfeed any future children.

[StealthPolarBear]

for your relative.
That is such a good idea though, a mythbusting campaign.
"I don't think I'll have enough milk to breastfeed"
"I can't breastfeed as I don't want to give up my favourite food"
"I don't want to breastfeed as I want my baby to sleep through the night"
suggest it! go on...

[ReverseThePolarity]

There is something similar in our area - a series of leaflets, two for mum & one for dad, and at the back there is a Q&A section which is basically mythbusting. It's in the style of a glossy mag, so, "My nan says I won't be able to bf twins, is that true?" "No it isn't (etc. etc.)" and so on and so forth.

It's a good idea I think, although the rest of the mag seems - to my mind - to be a bit too "selling breastfeeding" iyswim, but baby steps & all.

Suzi2 I'm sorry to hear about your relative being given cruddy advice.

[hercules1]

I can understand an elderly person believing such a myth but I find it hard to believe that any mw or hv could be that ignorant despite how poorly trained many are.

[StealthPolarBear]

i was meaning up on walls along with the "start of something special" ones.
A friend has recently got pregnant and was saying she wasn't sure whether she wanted to bf as she wasn't sure how she'd know how much the LO is getting, is worried about bf in public and doesn't want to avoid alcohol any more.

[PortAndLemon]

Her milk probably wouldn't even have come in yet at day 3, would it? So how any of them can formulate any kind of sensible hypothesis about the properties of this hypothetical substance is beyond me. Or perhaps the baby is secretly psychic and had foreseen that the milk would be too weak when it eventually came in and was feeling grumpy about that ...

[Twiglett]

I do think sometimes people, possibly like your relative, don't want to breastfeed and find that the 'medical reason' for not doing so is much easier to grasp on to

I'm fairly certain the MW and HV would not have reinforced this belief but they might have reassured her that if she felt that was the right thing to do then it was totally fine .. she will latch on to this ('scuse pun) in the face of any perceived criticism

and I do believe it is possible for any formula feeder to look on someone who has succesfully breastfed as the personification of criticism

[WigWamBam]

Crap information definitely affects women's decisions to breastfeed future children.

My sister gave up breastfeeding her first baby when the HV told her that her milk was "poisoning" her baby.

She didn't even attempt to feed either of her other two children, because there was no point - she firmly believes that her milk was bad.

She went so far as to send me bottles and formula when I was first breastfeeding my daughter because she was convinced I would be the same.

[TheFallenMadonna]

Obviously if the MW and HV gave them the impression that the milk was too weak, then that is highly suspect. But is it possible that the family are sort of post-rationalising to justify the decision to stop breastfeeding?

[Pruners]

Message withdrawn

[suzi2]

They're not trying to rationalise the decision - she was unable to breastfeed due to medication post birth so it wasn't a choice as such. It just so happens that her baby was gruchy while breastfed and settled with formula. I doubt very much that her milk was even in. But I find it really sad, that even though things were going well, and the decision to stop was not hers, people have found a great reason as to why breastfeeding wasn't going to work for her anyway.

I've told her (well, through my mum) that she could still establish bf now she's off that medication. But they're all quite happy on formula which is fine.

Reversethepolarity, that sounds like a good leaflet.

[Orinoco]

Message withdrawn

[StealthPolarBear]

[TreadmillMom]

People do talk such crap re breastfeeding, it really does do my head in.
My MIL used to say regarding feeding DS1 & 2 with my EBM, 'Its so watery, they're just not satisfied, its not filling them up' or 'They don't like the taste of your milk' etc.
My mother, on still feeding DS1 at 6 months, 'Don't you think its time you stopped, he looks really embarrased ' or 'Why are you still putting that empty, dead flesh into his mouth?'.
Do you know how I got through it and continued feeding both DCs till 9 months? I figured that if Formula feeding has only existed in the 'Western' world for one century (maybe less, don't know the exact dates), how the hell has the human race managed to make it to 2008 if the only option was BF?
I was fortunate too to have good support, my MW was great at encouraging my BF during a bout of Mastitis and a counsillor who was kind enough to visit my home to observe a feed when I was having problems latching on DS1.

[TREBUCHET]

To be fair treadmillmom the human race HASN'T managed to survive on breast feeding thus far-300 yrs ago there was a frightening infant mortality rate. If you could breastfeed, great. If not you either paid a wet nurse or if you were poor your baby died. People had so many children, hoping that a few would survive. In my opinion, formula is a relevant and good invention. I thank god for it, as for medical reasons I was unable to breastfeed.

Can't believe your ma and mil made such awful comments, that must've been so upsetting for you.

[princessosyth]

Very good idea about the myth busting leaftlet, much more useful than the "breast is best" one.