feed on demand or space the feeds out for newborn, please advise

[eenywifemum]

Hi! I have a 3 week old baby who I have been feeding on demand. The problem is this - he has colic. And he wants to feed CONSTANTLY. He has been feeding every hour for the most part and has even fed for two hours at a time - and he would have continued but I finally had enough and took him off the breast.

My health visitor who IS lovely has told me all this feeding is making his colic worse as he is just too full all the time and really he just wants to suck. She suggested I try to feed him no more frequently than every 2 hours. I have been trying that since Tuesday and it is ok sometimes but sometimes he gets so upset and cries a lot and I hate it. I want to give him what he wants but I am worried that it isnt actually the best thing for him.

Any advise on how to handle this would be so appreciated as I am really trying to do the best thing for him but I am not sure what that is.

By the way I would love it if he fed every 3 hours, I would feel like I was on holiday! I just dont want to deny him a feed if he wants one. I dont know really. If its relevant he was 4 weeks early. Thanks!

[MrsApronstrings]

we had this with dd1 - we certainly knew the constant feed ing made things worse, we tried to spin out the feeds a little rather than sticking to a rigid routine. if you are home on your own with just the one baby it can seem interminable!!

does ds get worse at a certain time of day? do you find he feeds less if you are out and about?

three weeks in and still feeding don't forget you are doing well. I always fing 3 weeks one of the toughest times - euphoria is somewhat gone,dh back at work, still getting to know baby and if you are anything like me sooo tired!

[melsy]

I know you may not condone the use of dummys , everyone has different feelings about them and I certainly havent ever been into them , but dd2 would be on me all the time if it wasnt for a dummy stretching her to 3 hrs in between feeds. She just likes to suck and suck and often it can be mistaken for hunger , but if she accpets it with no milk coming in then Im asuming shes satisfied , especially as she can be on me for up to an hr, although she may not be feeding all that time , as I can feel the difference in being used as dummy and feeding. Anyway Im rambling and waffling on, just hoping to help and suggest.

[Mumpbump]

My HV suggested giving bottled water to space out feeds, but don't know whether this would work with colicky baby. My baby boy went mental around 4 weeks and I took him to a cranial osteopath for a skull massage - I was very sceptical, but it did seem to work - have you thought of trying something like this? I think it can help with colic.

On I thought babies could suckle without feeding if they are B/F, but can't with a bottle which is why bottle fed babies tend to be fatter. Personally, I think there is nothing wrong in letting a baby suckle - although not forever! I put my 6m old baby boy to the breast earlier in the week (he is totally bottlefed now) 'cos he was very upset with teething. It calmed him down completely... Seems a shame to deprive them of their natural comfort...

BTW, my baby boy fed every 1.5 to 2 hours for the first couple of months during the daytime and every 3 during the night, so I know how you feel!

[eenywifemum]

thanks for the advice. We have been giving him a dummy and it definitely helps a little. DS does have worse times of day I think... I Am so tired I'm in a bit of a daze and at the moment I cant think what those times are! haha Taking him out seems to settle him for longer periods of time- We've been out once today but may go out again later on.

[MrsApronstrings]

hang in there eenymum - a dummy is a great idea - I had forgotten dd1 ever had one. I would say its worth a try, even if you don't like them a sparingly used dummy at this stage is very different from a 3 year old with one in their pocket!!. They also stop them swallowing so much air.

[emmatom]

I feel tired and exhausted just reading your posts!

Just wanted to say, whatever you decide, it won't always be this hard.

He will grow so quickly and this really hard work new born stage will be over so quickly, so hang on in there.

[purplemonkeydishwasher]

eenywifemum - you are doing a graet job!
My DS was like yours in taht he fed A LOT. But eventually things did start to calm down. I would comtinue with what you are doing if he seems ok then go with it, but when he cries then feed him.
I remember sitting there in tears one night thinking that the only way i knew how to sooth my DS was to stick a boob in his mouth. But, you konw what? That's what he wanted!
It's hard for us because we are used to spaced out meals but newborns aren't like that. it's hard and exhausting and some days you just want to scream but (and this is important) IT GETS EASIER.
Out of curiosity what are the symptoms of his colic?

[eenywifemum]

typing w/ 1 hand, ds in the other!

purplemonkey - he cries so badly he gets into a real state. stiffens his whole body, belly goes hard and legs either stiffened out or curled up tight. am going to try swaddling tofday i think

thanks so much for telling me I am doing a great job I really need ot hear it!! today is actually his due date!

[Salamander]

His colic symptoms are raising legs, inconsolable crying, repetitive feeding/sucking, tightening of tummy, red face, trouble burping

(i'm eeny's DH by the way)

his worst times are between 6pm and 3am!
but not exclusively!!

[Salamander]

crossed posts Eeny!!

[USAUKMum]

Hi both my DD & DS had colic. Your DS will grow out of it it is different for each babe DD was about 12 wks and DS about 18wks. DS cried most of 12 hrs while awake -- DD only from about 5 - 9pm. Here are some things that worked:

• carrying them around in a sling
  
• vaccum cleaner / extracter fan (the white noise helped calm them)
  
• massaging the tummy ( if you can get into a baby massage class I highly recommend, or get a book) there are some classic moves for colic which work well.
  
• Going outside in the garden.
  
• rocking
  -- DD liked going for walks (DS hated it)
  
• I would removed them from breast after about 45 min -- feeding from both sides. Or when you hear that they aren't swallowing.
  
• Infacol works but needs to build up, or other such.
  
• make sure you wind them, as it can build up and make the crying worse. we found putting some pressure on the tummy helped this.

[Salamander]

Thanks for the advice USAUK mum
are you USA, UK or both!?

[purplemonkeydishwasher]

eeny - you ARE doing a great job. Don't ever think otherwise!
The first few weeks are HARD HARD HARD. (wow that word looks funny when you keep typing it...)
I remember the fist couple of weeks i would see pregnant couples in the supermarket and laugh to myslef thinking 'you have noooo idea what you're in for!'
Now i look back (DS is 11 months) and think fondly of the time when he wasn't on the move!
Also, have you tried lying down to nurse him? at least then you'll get some rest too.

[Mum2FunkyDude]

Sorry I don't have firsthand experience, but my brother does and he said his dd slept in the car seat for the first 3 months, it helped having her propped up a little. In most cases the valve closing the stomach off from the oesophagus is not completely developed yet and you then get acid reflux, just as bad as it would be for an adult. Also try and prop up her mattress by putting phone books etc underneath, you can also purchase a wedge of foam for this that will help keep your baby more upright while sleeping.

They used to wind her during a feed by interupting for a few minutes, putting her over the shoulder and gently rubbing and sqeezing upwards from the left side. Another thing to keep in mind is that they need at least 2 hours to digest a feed, so if you continue to feed every hour you are compounding the problem.


Best of luck and be sure that they do grow out of it, sooner than you think.

[USAUKMum]

I am an American living in the UK -- both children are dual citizens.

I used to wind them both between sides, as they fed from both during each feed as well.

[MrsApronstrings]

do they still make infacol? - or is that a no no these days because that definately used to help get the wind up

[eenywifemum]

he's been on infacol but I am trying him on colief now because he has had such a terrible 48 hours! Does anyone know if I can use Infacol AND Colief at the same time?

Also USAUKMum - I am American living in England as well, been here 6 years & my son has duel citizenship.

[bananaloaf]

ds2 was like that until about 8 weeks and then calmed down. used infacol, but i fed him on demand.ds1 was more structured and i also with both would give water. ds2 did have a dummy during that time but now longer needs the dummy. hth

[CountTo10]

We used a dummy and also used to give small sips of water now and again (cool and boiled obviously!!!) which seemed to cut down on the constant feeding. We used infacol but you do have to be careful with it as it can bring on reflux or just make them purge themselves a little too much. I wouldn't advise using both infacol/colief at the same time but spk to your pharmacist who should be able to help. Warm olive oil massaged into the lower stomach and lower back can be a good relief as well. Hope all works out and hang in there as I know how tough it can be.

[3andnomore]

Hi,
here a link that maybe could help you!
www.kellymom.com/newman/02colic_in_bf_baby.html

[bumbleweed]

Here's that link

[3andnomore]

Bumbleweed...how can you change a URLink into that "link" thing?

[3andnomore]

doh...tis explained under the emotiocons....doh...blond day!

[3andnomore]

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