I have recently had a baby who is 14 weeks old and am currently on maternity leave from my job. I arranged with my manager to come into the office for an hour or so, bringing baby with me to show off and to pretty much clear out my over flowing email in box. I had mentioned to my manager that I was breastfeeding.
Of course my dear son decided he wasn't going to stay asleep as I had hoped and he wanted feeding. So I automatically took him out of his car seat and was about to feed him then and there at my desk. Under my top, there was nothing to see. To be honest I didn't think anything of it- I have breast fed my two other children and am so used to just feeding them where ever I am and carrying on with what ever I was doing one handed.
My Manager flapped a bit and said "No no no, you can't do that here. Could you feed him somewhere else? like the toilets?!" to which I said no I wouldn't because it's unhygienic. My manager said that it would be inappropriate to feed him at my desk and whisked me off to a meeting room to feed him. Where she waited with me until he'd finished. While he was feeding she said that there were 11 others on our team who may feel offended by my feeding. I said that it's fine and I hadn't even thought about it as I was so used to doing it.
Since then I have thought about and I am actually pretty irritated by it. By having a conversation about it, taking a crying hungry baby across a large office caused more fuss and drew more attention to it than had I just fed him, plus I would have been able to get on with my work as well. I felt a bit embarrassed too - as it's open plan everyone heard what was said- almost like I was doing something wrong. I'd say I'm really confident about breastfeeding and that if my child needs food I will feed them where ever but this has me questioning myself- is it my right to do so?
My manager is fairly new at managing people and doesn't have children of her own and she was not in any way mean or unkind but I think it was a situation she wasn't prepared for and to be fair is highly unlikely to have to deal with again.
It's raised some questions for me though, which I hope you can help me with.
Firstly - was she right, was it inappropriate to feed him at the desk? I know employers provide a room to express because perhaps to sit at your desk, boobs out, hooked up to a pump may be a bit much, but for breastfeeding do they have the right to tell you that you must go into a separate room? surely it's at the mother's descresion? I personally don't feel that I want to be hidden away- I'm descreet and it's normal.
Secondly - if he was bottle feeding would I have had to move?
If she was in the wrong, what's the best way to bring it up? I don't want to complain formally or anything because I think she's just never come across it before and just needs educating.
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Infant feeding
Advice needed- Breastfeeding at work.
6 replies
smileymaddy · 22/02/2013 10:27
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