In need of opinion/advice

[Milence]

Hi, I'm a new member and need your opinion and advice.

My DS will be 17weeks old on Monday. He weighed 7lb 9 when he was born and has been EBF with an occassional bottle of EBM from birth. He is a healthy happy boy but his weight has been rather slow from 50th he went down to 9th centile. I had him weighted yesterday and he is now 12lb 13, his height is at 75th centile. Me and DH aren't concerned as DH is tall and skinny and always has been.

In the first month I struggled with cracked nipples + engorgement and DS was unsettled at breast hence the reason why I started expressing. In the past few weeks I've not given him much EBM as he's much happier on the breast. He does still feed every two hours or so and this week has started waking up 2-3 times a night to feed (we were on one night time feed before). I'm tired but feel I'm coping otherwise and my DH is great support.

DS has always been a short feeder 5-10 min max and rarely takes to second breast straight away, but prefers a 30min or so break. I make sure I give him the same breast he had the previous feed first so he gets the hind milk. He has plenty of wet and dirty nappies.

So my issue has been with Grandmother pressure. One of them thinks I need to start weaning and the other (my mother) thinks I need to give him formula because he's not sleeping through and isn't chubby enough! They both had their kids in 70s and 80s and have very different views to mine! Don't see the point of formula and don't want to wean before 6 months.

This has been getting me down lately as I'm starting to feel like I'm being stubborn and not doing what is best for my baby.

Thanks for reading this, your opinions/advice would be much appreciated. : )

[RitaMorgan]

I wouldn't wean if he's happy and healthy, but I wouldn't restrict him to one breast either. There's no need to try to make him get the hindmilk, just offer the other side when he's finished with the first.

[wigglesrock]

Hi, I am a formula feeder with a 18 week old dd, she is still not sleeping through or anywhere near it, she is about the same size as your son. I have formula fed 3 dds and it has never made a difference to them sleeping through, wish it did . Grandmothers can't live with them ................

[HalleLouja]

I wouldn't wean just yet. When you start to wean they have such small quantities it doesn't really make a difference, unless there is a medical reason. 17 weeks is still early to be sleeping through - some of my friends LOs were much older than that before they slept through. It might be more that you need to "teach" him to sleep rather than he is hungry per se. But that is another thread entirely.

I weaned my LO at 23 weeks as he was really fussy at the breast and really interested in food on my plate. My HV who kept saying wait til 6 months told me to go ahead when I told her this. He then became much less fussy when bf.

Your LO seems happy and is putting on weight so go with what your instincts are.

[twinklegreen]

milence sounds like you are doing absolutely fine, just carry on doing what you are doing.

It's very normal behaviour for a baby this age, all my three have started waking more often during the night at around 16 weeks, I'm sure that things will even out again soon enough.

There is not need to start weaning, as breastmilk has alot more calories than puree's etc, and is all your baby needs until 6mths.

I know it's hard to stand your ground against family members but you ARE doing what is best for your baby by exclusively breastfeeding him.

I can recommend finding a good local breastfeeding support group

good luck :)

[Paschaelina]

Also 17 weeks is right on the 4 month developmental spurt which is known for buggering up sleep patterns. It gets better around 19-20 weeks IIRC. If your baby is happy and healthy then changing to formula or weaning won't make a shits worth of difference.

[organiccarrotcake]

Hmm, the old Grandma pressure. :(

Sadly, they truly believe what they're saying, because it's what THEY were told, and in the same way that you understand that their information is wrong, they honestly believe that what they were told is right.

The difference is that what they were taught when they had their babies was theory and supposition. What is taught nowadays is almost always based on sound scientific evidence.

Unfortunately, doing something different can be seen as criticising them, or if they do understand why you make different choices, they can feel guilt for doing things "the wrong way" (although of course they did the very best for their babies that they knew to do).

There's no easy answer, as every family relationship is different. Perhaps my only advice would be that for every decision you make, think what you would do if no one else in the world was around other than your DH, and go with that. Hold firm with what you and your DH feel are right for you, within the context of advice from trusted people around you, and if necessary, lie...

[Milence]

Thanks a lot for your comments, feel much better now! : )