1yr old wakes up screaming - HELLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPP!

[itsahardknocklife]

DS is 14months old. He has started waking up screaming, and I mean SCREAMING. It can be the middle of the night or even if he has dropped off in the car. It takes ages to calm him down. Any suggestions as to what's causing it and how we can stop it or help him?
I'm still dealing with PND and I'm ashamed to say that the screaming makes me really angry
Luckily DP will deal with it - but now we have started arguing about what to do.

[JodieG1]

Could he be having nightmares? Or maybe wakes up feeling confused? Not sure really.

[deaconblue]

My ds has always woken up really really crying so I am used to it. Takes ages for him to feel ok again (he's 20 months). Seems strange that yoru ds has suddenly started doing it. Has anything in his room changed? I think this is about the age they first start to dream so maybe the little fella is having bad dreams.

[itsahardknocklife]

I wondered if it was nightmares, but I wasn't sure if they dreamt yet, but obviously they do.
Nothing in his room has changed - perhaps the cat walks in, but he loves the cat and usually laughs at it. Maybe it could freak him out in the night?
Shoppingbags, what do you do to calm your son down when he wakes up?

[deaconblue]

I just cuddle him and whisper "mummy's here" but sometimes if he's really crying I bung on Cbeebies and that seems to snap him out of it and distracts him. He seems to struggle to wake up when he's like that and can be standing in his cot but not really awake iykwim. Makes me wonder how he would cope if he did full days at nursery and had a sleep there though, puts me off taking him for full days til he's past the day time nap age

[crokky]

My DS is a few months older than yours, he sometimes wakes up suddenly screaming. He doesn't do it that much and I can always respond quickly as he is next to me in the bed - I cuddle him, tell him I am with him and give him a beaker of diluted juice as quickly as possible. Probably that is not great for his teeth, but it is only occasional and I don't want him to be upset.

[itsahardknocklife]

I know what you mean, shoppingbags, my DS is often standing in his cot half asleep - usually because he has thrown his dummy out and wants it back!
Crokky, DP always ends up giving DS a bottle of milk in the night (DP goes to him automatically because I get too flustered and end up giving up and leaving DS crying. Great mum, I am, huh?). DS no longer has bottles at any other time. But DP's continued use of a bottle to settle DS is another area we disagree on! I think it's time to ditch the bottle at night. And then start work on getting rid of the dummy...

[katewilson13]

I've had this with my DS (now 17 months). I put it down to nightmares. I am ashamed to say that I've tried to ignore it the last couple of times and wait and see if he can settle himself back to sleep. Sometimes he does and sometimes he doesn't. When he doesn't I do what your DP does - and give him a bottle of milk. Not sure that it matters really (about the bottle) it soothes my DS instantly and then he goes back to sleep for the rest of the night. And I'm sorry to say that I swear by a dummy! My DS will fall asleep with it and seems quite happy if it falls out. You sound like a great mum - I find MN a huge relief as I discover that loads of other people have the same worries that I do (and it seems that parenthood is just one constant worry)! I'm really impressed that you're not using a bottle during the day - not something I have succeeded in at all (still doing 3 bottles a day) but I suspect that it's me (still suffering from firsttimeparentitis) and finding it difficult to make my DS move on. Will be interested to see other posts on this topic!

[itsahardknocklife]

Thanks for the words of support, kate

We started using the tommee tippee basic cups (they are about 99p in the supermarket) now and again until little man got the hang of them and then, over about a week, got rid of the bottles in the day altogether. Now he uses the cups without trouble - although he does enjoy holding them upsidedown to make a river in the highchair tray!

[deaconblue]

hey Kate and Itsahardlife, please don't feel guilty or ashamed to say you've found ways of coping with babies crying in the night. We do our best and can do no more. I don't think there's anything wrong with waiting to see if a baby gets back off to sleep by himself or giving milk if it's needed. We gave ds milk in the night for ages, then swapped to water in the hope it would put him off waking in the night. MAde no difference, he just grew out of it in the end. Bear with it, your baby will be ok I'm sure

[itsahardknocklife]

reassuring to know he might grow out of the milk in the night.

[yummytummymummy]

My son is 11 months old nearly and wakes up with screaming fits, no matter how I try to comfort him, with milk, cuddles, dummy etc it takes ages and is really upsetting. He had an ear infection a few weeks ago (in both ears) but this should have cleared by now. It is really getting us down! My husband says its an attention thing but I'm not so sure as I give him lots of attention. Any other suggestions other than those already mentioned??