Terrible 2's Why are they SO Terrible - HELP (long story)

[Elsbells]

My DS is 2y 3m and his tantrums seem to be on the rise.
He had a meltdown at a shopping centre on Monday crying or should I say bellowing for over an hour and nothing would please him (giving him a cuddle, letting him walk, raisins etc).

Did a great show at the GP's as well yesterday by throwing himself on the floor between the door of the reception area and waiting room for about 10min screaming.

They seem to become daily now (on top of the usual minor tantrums). He has also started hitting other kids for no reason when we have playdates. He did attend a nursery from 8m when I went back to work so he is used to other children and currently attends a preschool 3 mornings a week. I have spoken to his key worker and he is as good as gold there (minor wobbles but definitely no hitting).

I am finding it embarrassing and it makes me edgy when we are out.

I also have a DD (nearly 21 weeks) so I am trying to balance the 2.

He did not take to well to the new addition (took his anger out on me not DD) but it all seemed to have settled.

Why is his behaviour getting so naughty? He was a model child up until a few weeks ago.

Any suggestions?

Will it get better?

[glaskham]

you have just described my son exactly!!!!

my son is now 2 y 10mths and we are just coming out the other side.....

they test the boundaries at this age, thinking that by having a tantrum 'mummy will give in and let me have my way'......best thing i did was almost ignoring his tantrum and just say what are you doing?....then he'd have no answer for me, so would calm himself down and carry on......we still ahve the occasional tantrum but mainly when he's tired!!!

i also had a younger child, and now my daughter has gone from demanding baby to amazing toddler at 18mths i havent had a tantrum yet!!!! and i think it helped that she saw her brother get nothing out of it!!!

good luck!!!

[HonoriaGlossop]

Yes it will get better! The years between 2 and 4 were the ones where I found ds was the most prone to tantrums (but do not fear, by age four they were not nearly so frequent!)

Ignoring really is your strongest weapon. And when he's calmed, just move on, don't stew on it or talk about it with him too much or harbour resentment if he's embarrassed you!

I have to say, do avoid shopping centres if you possibly can. i had to do this with ds; get food shopping delivered, or do it in the evening when kids in bed. If I had a penny for every post i'd read on here saying "my child melted down at the shopping centre today"!!! Don't worry, you don't have to train them to get used to it; when they're a bit older they are more able to sustain being out shopping without meltdowns. Avoid the shops like the plague.

[Elsbells]

Great bit of advice about avoiding shopping centres. I guess a few hours tottering around is a bit much to ask at this age.