scared at swimming lessons

[Babyramone]

My DS 3yrs 10months has started swimming lessons.
Previously he'd just gone with me and his friend and his mum to their health club pool which was always quiet. He was very confident jumping in from side and bobbing about in middle of pool with his arm bands on shouting "look at me I'm swimming"
Granted We haven't been since January as circumstances havent allowed (have 11 month who was reluctant to be left in creche) but I thought he'd be ok with the lessons.
However he got in last week (1st lesson)freaked as thought was deep and spent lesson sobbing at side. I actually wasn't there as was in hospital having surgery. Today took him myself to his lesson and gave him lots of encouragement. He seemed happy enough and got changed but again refused to go in.
Parents are encouraged to leave but come back if needed so I went in to see how he was. He was really upset.
TBH the instructer was great trying to encourage but not force but he's on own with 7 other preschoolers.
I managed to get DS to sit on side of pool and splash with legs and he even went in water for minute but hung on to me before scrambling out.
Has anyone got experience of this, or tips on how I can help him.
I'm hoping to take hin myself but I have 11 month and no one to help.
I suggested DH take him at weekend but he's unkeen as pool busy
What should I do.

[paulaplumpbottom]

Maybe he just needs some time, 3 is still very little

[Babyramone]

MMh wondered that. The other children in group are all so able but do get taken every week by parents.
Do you think I should cut my loses with lessons or carry on taking him and letting him go at own pace interspaced with taking him with me.
I don't mind losing my place.

[paulaplumpbottom]

maybe give him another lesson or two and if things don't improve, i'd stop taking him

[Flibbertyjibbet]

my son is a year younger than yours, but similar circumstances - we used to go swimming in my local pool every week from him being 6 weeks old till last xmas when our pool shut down. I had only taken him on his own, and ds2 on another day on his own as I felt two so small was far too stressful!
So 6 weeks ago I decided to take them both swimming at a parent and child session. At xmas they were both so confident in the water, the older one jumping in and splashing. In July it was a nightmare, both of them screamed their heads off, wouldn't let go of me, we spent the full hour with me sat on the top step of the baby pool with 14m old clutching on to me and the other one refusing to get in the water!
Anyway I stuck at it, we've been 6 times now and last week FINALLY we were back to the jumping in and splashing and I was able to take ds2 out of the swimseat for the first time.
So... what I'm saying is that I've been managing a 2.5yo and 14m old, taking them on my own. Its really hard work but worth it as they will play together in the water. I can hardly make it into the building with all the arm bands, swim rings, baby seat, ball, blow up nemo for playing with etc etc but we have a good time in the water so its worth all the effort and trying to control them in the changing rooms.
Stick at it!

[jenkel]

We started my dd with one on one swimming lessons at about the same age as your son. The teacher is lovely, very gentle and she appears to be getting on really well. A little more expensive but in our case worth it.

[EmsMum]

Its not unusual... he's got plenty of time so not worth battling. Did you ask the instructor's opinion - bet he's seen this sort of things loads of times before and is likely to have realistic view of whether to persist now or back off.

My DD went through very scared patch at 4/5 but is absolutely fine now.

My DH hates busy pools too... perhaps he'd rather look after baby while you take the boy to the pool at the weekend? If either of you does take him, go very gently and don't try to push him beyond comfort level.

Oh, and goggles can help a lot.

[Babyramone]

Thanks for those tips.
Flibberty will def stick at it and good to know you cot through it.
One problem I have is our local council has a restriction on how many you can take by your self (Think 1-1 under 4)
Def think I have to try and put dd in creche again. and see from there.
Paula/jenkel will give lessons a couple more goes then see from there and consider 1-1.

[Babyramone]

instructor is all for letting him go at own pace.
One question.
Ihad surgery (keyhole)kast week how long do you think should leave til I can go in. would take him on saturday otherwise.

[Flibbertyjibbet]

Whilst I do take both of them to the parent and toddler session cos you are allowed more than one under five at that, I take ds1 at the weekends, he actually enjoys it more when its busy - other kiddies to splash about with etc than just floating about with his mum.
I think its a man thing 'the pool is too busy' because never in 8 years have I managed to get dp to go swimming! So he minds ds2 if I take ds1 for some one to one splashing.

[Babyramone]

What is it with men.
My dh is happy to go to busy gigs (gets right down the front)but refuses to get in a pool with more than 2 strangers.
Think going with him when busy and taking slowly way to go.
Thnks again