1yr old won't sit down in bath

[chiara71]

in the past 2 weeks dd has been stubbornly refusing to sit down in the bath, after using a bathseat for months.

She's always loved bathtime since she was a newborn and recently she was excitd at all the new games she could do in the bath, but now from one day to another she simply refuses to sit down which leaves me trying to bath her and wash her hair with one hand while holding her with the other. NOw besides this being dangerous (I'm constantly afraid she'll slip), it makes it impossible for me to wash her hair without dripping water all over her face (which she typically hates).
I guess I could buy a shampoo shield, but the point is how do I get her to sit down again?? Has anyone had a similar problem?

(I know my sister has, she resolved it by having a bath with her dd, but I'd hate to have a bath with her every night if I can avoid it)

Thank you for all your suggestions!!

[threeangels]

Chiara71, How about playing a fun childs musical tape. Maybe a character she likes. Sesame street songs or blues clues are always kids favorites. If you have a small tape recorder bring it in the bathroom. The music might take her mind off the bath situation. You can even sing to her. Maybe since she is out of the bathseat she is feeling insecure. I mean she may have felt more secured with the bathseat. She probally needs time to adjust to the different way of bathing.

[SofiaAmes]

chiara71, my ds (18 mo.) has taken showers instead of baths with my husband and I since he was able to sit up as neither of us like to take baths. We have a large non-slippery bath, but when I travel I always put a rubber bathmat down in a conventional bath so my ds can stand without slipping while showering. I think you can get them pretty much anywhere. Have you tried johnson baby bath/shampoo, it doesn't sting in the eyes if you do happen to drip some.

[Joe1]

My ds doesnt sit down either and likes to stand while playing with his toys and a jug. He does have showers with dh and I have started giving him his own little shower too.

[bloss]

Message withdrawn

[monkey]

I'm afraid I'm eveil - I say sit down, and ds usually does, and try to keep asking patiently, but if he refuses, or he stands so much it gets on my nerves, I then say if he won't sit down he'll have to get out, and then follow through once the threat's been carried out. Older ds is allowed to stand ( not when younger is in - unfair & mixed messages etc) but this age, they're just too unsteady.

I carry out the same threat for his hilarious phase of throwing everything, including wet flannels and just of water out of the bath. Works for us and means I don't have to stress or get cross

[Queenie]

Chiara71, my dd did this for ages and we did have a bad fall which resulted in her chipping her front tooth quite badly. Huge guilt trip for me for not being strict and insisting she sat. She now does sit of her own choice. In meantime used to put thickest bath sheet around the bath to save what teeth she had left. She has a massive head of hair so washing it was important - she would pull the hair sheild off and duck and dive to avoid the rinsing bit. Complete nightmare!!When she felt comfortable with splashing the water and blowing bubbles herself she seemed to want to sit down and loves the bath now. I just say look up at the sky and she holds her head back to rinse the shampoo off. Just make bathtime as safe as possible until this phase passes.

[chiara71]

Thank you all, for your suggestions, but I don't think she'd like to have a shower, she just hates having the tiniest drop of water on her face...
I don't think her problem is boredom though, while she stands she tries to reach out for her toys so she IS interested.

Monkey, my friend suggested the same method, she thinks dd is just trying to test her limits (and mine), as she throws the same sort of tantrums to go in ther car, highchair, pushchair, or if we deny her something she wants.
I don't know if I can do that....she cries desperately and I just goes against all my instincts to force into something, also I'm afraid I might make her even more scared of the bath...

Well I hope the phase we'll go soon, we're off on holiday with her cousin next week, she might have a bath with her.....(hopeful mother!!)

thanks to all

[jodee]

Chiara, it IS just another one of those phases, but why not, for a bit of peace, get a shampoo shield anyway? I know it's not ideal to wash her hair standing up, but it only takes a couple of minutes to lather up and rinse, and with the shield on she won't feel the water on her face and it will all be over in seconds. We used a shield up until ds was 2 (then it didn't fit his head anymore) and it was brilliant. As already suggested, a long bath mat is also a great idea. Good luck though!

[Enid]

chaira, dont bother with the shampoo shield, just wash her hair as quickly as poss when necessary, she'll get used to it.

Is that mean? I did that with dd when she went through this stage and now she's not in the slightest bit bothered about water in her face. I actually remember having a shampoo shield when I was little, it didn't work anyway and made me really conscious of the whole awful process.

Have you got an extra long bath mat (Blooming Marvellous)? We have a huge cast iron bath and ours covers most of the bottom and means dd can almost dance about without falling over.

[Tetley]

Chiara - you too?! We've had this problem for the last couple of weeks - ds is 20 months - and I'm despairing. He is fine until I put water on his head (very small amounts just to get his hair wet - doesn't run in his face), and if he sees the shampoo bottle coming out he goes into hysterics. I've never got shampoo in his eyes (& it is Johnsons No More Tears just in case anyway) so I can't see the problem. However, I am being a horrid Mum & carrying on regardless as I'm sure it's a phase (same problems as you also with highchair, car seat etc), and I feel that he just needs to get used to it. However, I do now cringe evry time I think his hair needs washing.

[zebra]

I think we still only wash DS's hair about once a month -- solves many problems. Use a flannel to do all following: get hair wet, apply shampoo, sponge shampoo out. No need to pour any water or buy anything special.

[Rkayne]

dd (15 months) sometimes tries this as well - I think they go through a phase where once they learn how to stand up they just want to be standing all the time. I've used the same tactics as monkey and it works pretty well. DD loves being in the bath so if she's sitting down and being good i let her stay in and play for a long time. But if she stands up or throws things out of the bath, then I just give her a quick wash and take her straight out again. Even at 15 months I think she gets the idea !

[peanut]

Well Im having to go through this absolute refusal to sit in the bath with my DD and she is only 9 months old(just). As many times as i sit her down she just stands up again. I have now got a non slip bath mat from mothercare and i just let her get on with it (at least i can clean all her nooks and crannys easily) she gets bored eventually and sits down.

[Rkayne]

How funny. Having just posted on Friday saying dd 'sometimes' tries this, what do you think she's done every night for the last 3 nights?? She sits down ok at first while I'm washing her, but then gets bored and stands up. I tell her to sit down or bathtime will be over and she does, but within seconds she gives me that cheeky smile and stands up again, waiting to see what I'll do! I usually tell her 2 or 3 times and also try and distract her with a different toy or game and then if she does it again, just take her straight out - explaining to her why bath time is now over. Ask me again in another week if it's actually working!

[carrieboo]

I know it sound's bizzare but try taking your child to water babies swimming sessions. The water is warm just like the bath, they have tapes playing, the pool is full of toys, and there is an instructor there at all times. They are full of practical advice as to how to solve these things and are willing to show you if you are a bit apprehensive about doing things yourself. I haven't got to the standing in bath issue yet (as ds is only 6m) but she has taught me how to get my ds used to having water on his head/face. We go twice a week and every session we sing ring-of-roses, when we get to all fall down we bounce a bit and then I blow in his face to get him to hold his breath and immediatly dunk him under the water! We all also play with a watering can and tip it over him and encourage him to do the same. He gets a shocked look on his face when we dunk him, but then goes on to put his own face in the water. It means we have no probs with water at all, he's very confident with it, even after he's dunked himself he just coughs and gets on we it. The instructors would probably have simmilar ticks for getting your child to sit.

[peanut]

I think confidence in the water is part of the problem. My dd has been in aqua tots since she was 4 months old and just loves the water especially putting her face under the bubbles in the bath. Standing is a relatively new skill for her (shes been doing it about 6 weeks now) and i just think she likes standing more than sitting at the moment.

[pupuce]

My son refused for a long time... and he went to my mum's (where he refused as well) so she bought him a bath book (made of plastic) and told him that she woud only read it if he sat down... (he loved books) - it worked like a charm ! He now (1 year later) LOVES the water but it took generally a very long time (and progress was slow) for him to start enjoying the water.

[JaneyT]

My dd who is now 2.5 has refused baths at varying times, sometimes it will last for several weeks. When this happens I just stand her in it long enough to lather her up and then get her out. She has a fear of any "dirty bits" in the bath - sometimes they come from the inside of squirty toys, but she also goes through phases of hating towels. With hairwashing I just do it very quickly, and only once a week.
Our younger dd - 14 months - has just started the standing only phase - so here we go again...

[daisyroot]

I don't mean to offend anyone but after reading some of these messages - who cares if your child stands up in the bath? At least you get to wash their bottoms which is after all the bit which needs it the most!!!

My 3 1/2 year old hates having his hair washed and always has so I just don't bother much - it doesn't really get that dirty - so we do it about every three to four weeks. People always comment on how shiny it is - I guess all the oils aren't stripped out so often.

[webmum]

daisyroot,

for one there are safety issues, if an unsteady 1yr old does not sit down you're left with having to hold them with 1 hand and wash with the other. I used to find this quite difficult as I couldn't avoid pouring water on her eyes. Hence lots of crying and wriggling which made it even more difficult.
also you're lucky if your child's hair don't get so dirty, but many dd for one, tends to smear food all over her hair and sometimes she'd need several hairwashes a day, if I could be bothered!!!!

[LizC]

If you're lucky this phase will only last a few weeks. My dd went through a phase of wanting to stand up most of the time in the bath probably at about 9-10 months, once she was confidently standing up. I do have a non-slip bath mat, but of course it doesn't cover all of the bath and she has slipped a couple of times. She does now sit down again for most of the bath though (in between standing up - but much more steadily now).

I try and just pour water over the back of her head while she's standing up and take my opportunity to pour water over the front on the occasions when she sits back down again or gets on all fours. Her bath book does always help to get her back down in the bath again when she's standing. We are still going through the stage of throwing things out of the bath though at the moment, particularly beakers full of water and she particularly loves drinking the bath water out of the beakers (after peeing in the bath)!

[mollipops]

I agree with webmum, it's dangerous - and I have proof of it... My ds has just had 5 stitches removed from just under his chin, where he slipped while kneeling (with some help from big sister mind you!) and struck the edge of the bath, splitting his chin open. It happens in an instant, we're lucky it wasn't worse. Little ones standing or kneeling in the bath is not on.

[forest]

I have to agree that it is dangerous them standing up. It was dds favourite thing to do until she slipped and bashed her mouth - blood everywhere but thankfully no stitches. This has stopped her standing as much and she seems happier playing with her toys than exploring everywhere else! I also put some non slip stickers (from mothercare) in the bath and now we splash the water and sing down down down in the deep blue sea and then point out the fish, starfish and octopus - she seems to love this. Gets repitive but then thats what they love!
As to washing her hair I don't! Just pour a bit of water over it and rub out the food. Her hair is clean and shiny.

[SnoobyKat]

Yep. DS (18months) is going through this at the moment too. Hairwashing is very relaxed and the shampoo only comes out on the odd occasion. Today, after much effort, I did manage to get him sit by bribing him with a small plastic watering can. Though he doesn't seem very bothered about water being poured over him. Just keep repeating to yourself - it's a phase, it's a phase!