Head banging, not autism so what is it?

[Pseudo341]

DD is nearly 2. For several months now she's been banging her head, hard on the floor or top rail of her cot. Not a rhythmic soothing thing, a really hard injuring herself thing. She'll do it a couple of times then cry because it hurts then do it more but keep stopping and crying and then doing it again. It happens at the slightest provocation, us saying no to anything, taking away something she shouldn't have, no reason at all seemingly a lot of the time. It's not possible to calm her, picking her up just makes her more distressed. We've had to build a padded play pen to keep her safe, it breaks my heart.

She also hits herself in the head a lot. She does have a bit of a weird hand flappy thing sometimes and shakes her head lots.

All my googling gives the same results, it can be a sign of autism or other behavioural issues. Nowhere can I find what these other behavioural issues might be.

Autism simply doesn't seem to fit. She interacts well with adults and other children. Brings toys to me to ask for help with them, goes to comfort other children when they cry, that sort of thing. Her language is slow, but all I've got to compare her to is her older sister and cousins who all spoke in sentences by their second birthday so I don't think I'm necessarily judging from a fair standard, no one else seems to think she's behind. She has quite a lot of words, just nouns really, and we occasionally get two together but not often. A lot of the time she'll refuse talk, I point to a picture in a book and ask her what it is but she won't say even though I know she knows the word.

She's been seen by HV, GP and consultant paediatrician (last one for something else but we did discuss it since I was there), all of whom have been no help whatsoever, all they say is try to distract her. Had a hearing test that was fine. HV is coming back as head banging is escalating, massive meltdowns several times a day.

Any ideas please? I'm getting rather desparate.

[HaleyLondon]

I've met a lot of children who have had this it often seems connected to deppression or frustration...have you considered things that could be going on at home/pre-school even problems other family members are having that might be making her down as children often know if something is up e.g paternal deppression or stress etc

[VeryEarlyDays]

Poor you Op! That must be really stressful.for you both!
Does she do it when you're not there? So if she is head banging on the rail of the cot can you leave and watch her on the monitor? Obv you do not want her to harm herself but it might help to know if this is something she does for herself or if it's an interaction thing. I know it is very unhelpful to hear at the moment when in the thick of it but under 4 there can be many worrying behaviours that they grow out of (desperately not using the word phase).

[BugritAndTidyup]

How horrible for you, OP.

I'm afraid I think you're ruling out autism for the wrong reasons to be honest. Bringing toys to you when she needs help is one thing, but does she bring them to you for the sheer joy of sharing them or purely because she wants to show you something?

Have you come across the MChat? It's a screening test for toddlers, and it could be worth doing if you haven't already.


Autistic behaviour is many and varied.

[Girlfriend36]

If speech is a bit behind might be worth pushing for a SLT referral as quite often they can pick up on other issues as well. I wonder whether there maybe some sensory processing issues involved and also have she had a recent hearing test?

[cuntycowfacemonkey]

Obviously no one can diagnose your dd based on your post but I agree with Bugrit that you can't rule out autism based on the things you mention. NOt all children with autism avoid interaction with others and many are very affectionate and social. I do think there is enough going on to warrant further investigation and I agree that a referal to SALT is a good place to start.

Keep a diary of the things that concern you so you have examples of worrying behaviours

[Ekorre]

Agree about sensory processing disorder. This book is good www.amazon.co.uk/Sync-Child-Carol-Stock-Kranowitz/dp/0399531653?tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21

There is a support thread in SN www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/2132906-Sensory-Processing-Disorder-support-thread that has loads of stuff you can do yourself and will give you more of an idea of how it can appear. Some kids are sensory seeking, some avoidant and some both!

No surprise that the professionals are useless! Don't try and get her to talk, just keep talking with her. If she says kitty, say soft kitty or she says Daddy, say Bye Daddy or light, say light off etc. to give her simple sentences she can use. Any interaction is good, pointing to things she wants or dragging you to fridge etc. Simple taking turns game like Pop Up Pirate are useful too. Taking turns is an important part of learning what conversation is, plus you can both have a bit of fun and shout POP!

[infiniteeee]

My son did this too and speech was delayed too. Turned out he had glue ear. We took him to an osteopath for cranial sacral therapy and it stopped and the glue ear cleared up. He was 3 and we never looked back.

[Pseudo341]

Thank you everyone, this has been enormously helpful. I shall reply from the top

I don’t think she’s depressed. She was under 18 months when all this started so I don’t think could have been having massively deep thoughts about her situation. I wouldn’t say we have any more stress at home than your average family, DH works long hours and we’re both tired but we hold it together pretty well. We have three very involved Grandparents so she’s surrounded by love and attention. The head banging has escalated since big sis started school though so maybe that’s affected her more than we’d thought. On the other hand I was ill and spent a week in hospital a couple of months ago and she seemed to deal with that pretty well.

I can’t help feeling it is just a phase that she’ll grow out of, but I don’t want to make the mistake of leaving it in case it is something more serious. She does it in her cot first thing in the morning when she wakes up, doesn’t even cry out, just starts banging harder and harder until someone comes. 5am is the normal time for this at the moment. On the other hand, she doesn’t tend to do it a nursery where she goes 2 days a week.

I’m not the sort of person to be in denial, I want to know the truth and if the truth is that she’s autistic then the sooner I know the better. It just doesn’t seem to tick the right boxes. I just did the online MChat questionnaire, I’ve done it before, it says she’s low risk. I won’t rule it out on that, my limited understanding of autism is that some people can be quite high functioning with it still.

I will ask HV for SALT referral tomorrow. Hearing test in June was fine, including specific glue ear test.

Diary is a good idea, I shall do that.

Sensory processing disorder does look more likely I think from a bit of googling. We’ve always had a problem of her not bearing to be touched when we’re trying to comfort her, she’d be lying in her cot crying trying to go to sleep but keep shoving my hand off if I tried to touch her. I will read that thread, and probably buy that book I think.

She did just copy me saying “grey mouse” (pointing at suitable picture) this morning. Very exciting stuff!

Thank everyone, you’re all marvellous. I’m feeling much more positive after this, I have a plan of action :)

[Girlfriend36]

The book The out of synch child is very good and covers most bases on sensory processing disorder, my own dd has some sensory difficulties and it is useful if it can be picked up sooner rather than later. Good luck with it all

[cuntycowfacemonkey]

Glad you are feeling a bit more positive OP, There is a great book called "It takes two to talk" by Hanen which has really easy, practical advice on helping to develop speech, particularly for children where there may be other issues going on.

You are right to be pro-active. It may be a stage that she moves on from but nothing bad will come of taking advice or trying ways to help her, if nothing else it gives you a sense of taking control rather than worrying whilst you wait and see.
The Special Needs Childrens boards on MN are a mine of great advice and information on this sort of thing so always worth posting over there too.

[BlackeyedSusan]

remember that girls can present differently to boys with autism.

good that you are not ruling it out, nor jumping to the conclusion that that must be it.

good luck with sorting it all out as finding what these things are and whether they are significant can take a lot of chasing about.