21 month old in toddler bed, need advice.

[MummyIsMagic79]

My 21 month old DS has learnt, this week, to climb out of his cot. Tonight my DH had to return him 13 times. He finally dropped off while sat on DHs lap, then DH put him up in his bed. This is while I was at work. He was asleep by 9.20, which is really late for him, he usually goes down awake into his cot, and sleeps for 11 hours.

He shares a room with his 8 year old brother, so this is disturbing him too.

Tried using a travel cot, as the sides are slightly higher, but he can get out of that too.

Having a real nightmare with it. Don't know what we'll do when school goes back. 8 year old DS really needs his sleep for school. The only option we have really, is to turn his cot into a toddler bed, but that's just going to be worse, isn't it? He's too young to understand us saying to him, it's bedtime, stay in your big boy bed. Will it just be hours of rapid return and screaming? I don't mind that, even if it takes a few weeks to break the back of it. But what about his poor brother?


Never had this issue before. DS1 and DD(5) went from a cot to a full size single at 3 years old and never really got up and roamed about, both settled well into the bed from the start. Maybe because they were older and understood when we made a big occasion of the 'big boy/girl bed'. But we can't do that with DS2, because he's too young!

Help??!

TIA :)


I'm so confused about what to do!!

[Chocolatestain]

Do you use toddler sleeping bags? If not it may be worth a try as it would make it much harder for him to climb.

[ChineseFireball]

Razor wire along the cot sides? Of course I'm joking I agree about trying sleeping bags.

Anecdote rather than advice really...we took cot sides off when DS started to climb out because it was less far for him to fall! He was about 23months iirc and we just reiterated "stay in your bed please", with varying degrees of success. You might be surprised at how much he understands at 21 months. First week was ok but subsequently he did get out a fair amount. We went back to doing some gradual retreat sort of thing where initially I sat by the bed so he had no reason to get out and over time sat further and further away. Took a couple of weeks but the screaming was limited. Admittedly we didn't have the complication of the room share however.

Is your DC still napping? Could you restrict the nap so he's more tired at bedtime and then maybe bring bedtime forward so there's more chance he's asleep when the 8-yr-old goes to bed?

Good luck. I hope you manage to sort something out that works for you all

[bronya]

My DS went into a toddler bed at 21 months. He was climbing out of the cot numerous times in the night and was going to hurt himself, so we took him to Ikea, let him choose the toddler bed he liked best, and put it up. He doesn't feel restricted any more, and doesn't get out of bed if he wakes in the night (unless he has the odd nightmare, which is fair enough!). He loves his bed now - will go and sit on it during the day if he's upset about something ('cos nasty Mummy said 'no' usually!) and snuggles down happily to sleep at night.

I'd try it with the sides off. Not much point having them up if he can climb out anyway. Perhaps get a bed guard though? Our toddler bed has one and if DS wriggles down to the end of the bed so he's below it, he has fallen out a couple of times! Has he got a comfort toy too? We've really pushed the attachment to 'doggy' and DS will now snuggle up to him if he wakes in the night, rather than going to find a person - much better!

[WildCherryBlossom]

We took our eldest out of the cot at 20 months for the same reason. Funnily enough we had a lot less issues with getting out of bed when in a proper bed. The other DC were put in proper beds (with bed guards) much earlier.

[MotherOfInsomniacToddlers]

I have escapee climbing circus children, dd climbed out at 13 months resulting in a trip to a+e. Sleeping bags got us to 18 months, but the she went in a bed, with a tall gate (actually meant for dogs- it's a baby dan one but taller than usual) on the door, which she definitely couldn't climb. So basically made the whole bedroom into a massive cot (box room) so no more difficult to get to bed. Ds showed the same climbing tendencies and is very tall so out of fear of another a+e trip I put him in a toddler bed at 14 months, he's 23 months and knows what stay in bed means and knows that's where he's supposed to sleep, some nights I put him in bed 2-3 times. When I first moved him I'd sit at the end of the bed til he was asleep just to ease the transition. Think they both went to bed easier once I moved them to a bed tbh

[DoItTooJulia]

We just did our first night of toddler bed with 22 mo ds. When he woke up in the night he just screamed from his bed. Made no attempt to get out at all. Despite the fact that we out up the bed because, like your ds he was climbing out of the cot and was going to hurt himself.

Re going to bed, I had to stay with him till he was asleep, but we always had to do that.

Interestingly he has a 9 yo ds and I haven't put him in with his brother yet for fear of disturbing him. Maybe I need to review that?

[Purpleflamingos]

I had ds in a toddler bed at 17months.
No advice as both dc frequently fall asleep in a variety of bedrooms and beds (ours, theirs, camping over in each other's) but usually are put in their own beds when falling asleep or asleep. Ds now 5 will happily fall asleep in his own bed alone.
On the plus side, ds can also scale a climbing wall quicker than an adult and both dc have done some peaks in the Peak District - you already have a potential sport for your ds.

[westcountrywoman]

We moved DD into a toddler bed at 19 months and bought a gro-clock. She was perfectly capable of understanding that she didn't get up until the sun came on. You just have to be firm, if he gets up, return him to bed without talking to him at any length. You may have to do it lots and lots of times at first but if you're consistent, he'll get the message.

Do it now before your older DS is back at school, then he can stay up a little later until his little brother is settled for the night.

[MummyIsMagic79]

Hi everyone. Thanks so much for your replies. Been on a long day at work Andean went out afterwards with kids and DH to visit family. Only just got to a computer!

Well, tonight, he went to bed, in a gro bag, but MUCH later than usual, as we'd been out. He was exhausted so he dropped straight off!! No climbing. However, DH says his afternoon nap was a different story. Cried and put up a fight, but eventually, after being returned four times, slept for 80 mins! It's not his sleeping that's a problem, he goes for 11 hours, it's just getting him to stay in there.

Will see how tomorrow goes, when he's in bed at his usual time, and report back. Thanks so much again. Mumsnet is fab.

[Fixitagaintomorrow]

Dd went into a bed at 14M. She's a little monkey and I was terrified she was going to fall while climbing out and land on her head. There was a 2 week period where I had to sit in the room with her for a couple of hours repeatedly putting her into bed, the first few times I would explain it was bedtime, then after that I would just say "no, into bed" a few times then I would say nothing and just put her in. This got less and less over the two weeks and then something seemed to click and I was able to put her up and leave her there, she would sit and play with her teddy for a while and when she was ready she would lie down and go to sleep.