DD (8.1) struggling emotionally.

[LilRedWG]

DD is currently emotional, not wanting to go to school, clingy, rude and teenagery with me and looking generally unhappy. :( The same happened this time last year.

I asked her last week if she was looking forward to moving into year four and she instantly burst into tears and sobbed that she couldn't do the literacy work in Y3 so there is no way she'll be able to do the work in year four and that she CANNOT go to middle school.

The thing is she does struggle with literacy but CAN work to the requirements of Y3, albeit slowly. Her teacher has supported her lots but is now saying (to me) that she must learn to be independent and not as reliant on help. She is now the process of pre-screening for dyslexia and the school are fabulous.

No matter what we say to DD she is in a spiral - convincing herself she is useless.

I just want my little girl to be happy, not stressed.

Any advice gratefully received. TIA.

[Looseleaf]

Poor you; this sounds upsetting and it sounds like positive action has to be taken in whatever form can help as school takes up so much time I'd hate for it to be stressful!
Can you talk to the head or have you? And is it definitely just the work that's stressing her, are friendships and everything else going well?

I doubt this will sort it but I often ask dd is there anything she can think of that would help or make it easier? Even just showing her that you are listening and caring will be helping a little bit. And reinforce that everyone is good at different things and that you love her exactly the way she is?

Sorry not more help but hoping things improve and maybe too a me teacher next year will bring changes or have a different style and build confidence?

[Looseleaf]

New teacher not me! Sorry

[LilRedWG]

Thanks Looseleaf. When I asked if there was anything I could do to help she instantly burst into tears and shouted that she didn't want to talk about it - typical DD, bottle it up. :( She is so like me it breaks my heart.

I get on well with the head and she knows DD very well, so may request a chat.

[deepbluetr]

I sympathise, my DD struggles with language too, and moving up a year can be daunting.
We are in Scotland and nearly a the summer break - I know my kids are exhausted atm and becoming quite tired and emotional.
I agree with those that your DD knowing that you are listening and understanding ( which I know you are) will help.

Also a spot of distraction may help, have a Mum/daughter day at the weekend. Clear the decks and make her your sole focus. You could plan a picnic, or a treasure hunt, make pink lemonade, take bread to feed the ducks, bake a cake later in the week.
A little "love bombing" will reinforce the fact that you are there for her and also show her that there is life outside schoolwork.

[LilRedWG]

Thank you. I am trying to give her lots of love and as much time as possible atm, but as DH is abroad at the moment I'm struggling. I love the phrase love bombing. :D

I will keep on trying with her and try and have a chat with the senco or head.