How to help dd cope with y4 friends who keep going off for a 'private chat'

[Fishstix]

They all do this at one stage or another I'm sure, though I have told dd it's hurtful for her to do it and she should avoid it if she can. But all the girls in her y4 class seem to be doing it loads ATM.

She's taken to hanging out in a threesome (let's call them A, B, and dd.) and today A asked dd if she could have a private chat with B. Dd asked if it was about her (was told 'no') and said that there was nothing A couldn't say to B that wasn't in front of her but A kept insisting and eventually dd said 'go for it then' and B went off with A to chat.

Dd admitted she overheard the first part of the conversation and B asked 'is it about dd' and A said 'yes', then B said 'is it bad' and A said 'kind of'. Of course she is now worried about what they were saying about her, ESP as they are all supposed to be close friends.

Ugh, even just writing this out makes it sound, and me feel, stupid for repeating it, but it's to give you a flavour of the situation I need to advise her on.

I've told her that she was right to stand up for herself and say that it wasn't nice to go off without her, but this is the first time it's happened and I know this is what she can expect more of in the future, and I'm not sure which is the best way for her to handle it if it happens again.

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Just watching with interest as my dd will be going into KS2 soon...