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Behaviour/development

Biting sister

4 replies

talcam · 01/09/2006 14:59

My normally very well behaved 2 1/2 yr old loves her 4mth baby sis and generally is very good with her but, three times now she has bitten her and i don't know how to disipline her. She is always immediately sorry and tearful after having done it but at 3 times i feel something has to be done. I would normally use a naughty step but i'm not sure if its appropriate.

Please help

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Silvermoomin · 01/09/2006 20:13

Hi there. I have a 3.5 year old and a 6 month old and although the older has not been horrible to the baby at all, she was naughtier after she was born and did hit me a couple of times which she hasn't really ever done before. IMO, even though its completely understandable why she did it, its also unacceptable so I did discipline her as I normally would (ie. put her on the naughty step) and she only did a couple of times. I also suggested that if she found she was really cross she could try hitting a cushion instead - maybe you could suggest this to your daughter? Good luck!

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lilmamma · 01/09/2006 21:18

I know what im about to say might upset some people,but when my 3 year old was coming home from nusery.he bit his sister,i told him off and he did the same the following day,so i bit him,he was shocked and i said see it hurts,i dont think he realsied how painful a bite is,he didnt do it again,but i dont know if it was just luck,but it worked.

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beddy · 01/09/2006 22:15

We have had a similar problem, my daughter also 3 has now got a 2mnth sister, at first she loved her to bits but then the novelty wore off a bit and she started hitting her & being rough, at one point deliberately pushing near her soft spot!
I found this very distressing as I wanted to discipline her, but also was aware that I didnt want to make her feel even more insecure & pushed out by the new sister!
She definately needs to know what she does is wrong, so discipline as you would normally. ( put them in their room, naughty step etc.)
Ask her when time is up, to say sorry & get her to tell you what shes sorry for.."I hit my sister" ( So they know why exactly they have been punished)
We have now made a big sister chart for her. Every time she is nice, she gets rewarded with a sticker. 5 stickers equal a big sister treat. We did this & it helps..
Reward Good behaviour. (Praise, your time etc..)
Ignore bad behaviour ( She wants your attention)
Discipline harmful behaviour.

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talcam · 03/09/2006 09:06

Thanks all for your help. I think I will try the sticker chart. The problem is it is quite infrequent so i need her to remember from one punishment to the next. Hopefully stickers will work though she loves them don't know why I didn't think of it myself. Thanks again.