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Behaviour/development

sibling rivalry.. any advice?

3 replies

beddy · 29/08/2006 21:29

I have a daughter who is 3 & a baby girl who is 6wks, My eldest (3) loves her new baby sister..sometimes!

We are finding it hard knowing how to deal with the other side of her feelings..hitting, pushing her head, generally being rough.

Does anyone have any recomended reading on this subject or advice, we know shes feeling jelous but how do we react without making the situation worse?

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fluffymum · 29/08/2006 21:49

HI

I posted similar thread recently. It does get better, my 3 year old son now much better with 10 month old. Took about 10 months to settle down. A lot of experimentation and roughness which is so difficult to deal with. Basically I was very soft on ds1 for 6 months. Now I have zero tolerance and if ds1 too rough goes to have time out in his room for 3 mins. It breaks your heart doesn't it, for both children. Now ds1 really enjoying laughing and playing with ds2...though sometimes does get very silly. Today he wacked ds 2 with pencil. Pencil immediately confiscated, mark shown to ds 1 with question "Do you think that was nice or nasty?" We just try yo explain the right way to him and try not to bellow...sometimes you have to bellow...hammer in ds2's hand etc (Yes!)...but just ends up frightening everyone!! Loads of praise to ds2, all the time for anything, especially when he has been playing well with baby. Also has Rocket chart which I resort to occasionally...smiley face for being nice to baby and a smarty after about 3 stickers. Stick with it, poor little thing she's had you all to herself for nearly three years and now everything has changed. It will be a while before she realises the advantages!! Good luck.

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wrinklytum · 29/08/2006 22:30

Be firm about toddler not hurting baby.Naughty step and time out if neeeded.Ensure toddler gets some 1 to 1 time with mummy.Involve toddler when they show an interest.It gets better .Honest!!!

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beddy · 01/09/2006 22:18

Thanks, have tried the ideas suggested & also a reward system..sticker chart every time she is a nice big sister..5 stickers get a treat. It seems to have helped.! (smile)