At wits end with night toilet training - support and advice needed please!

[Enid]

Would really appreciate some advice on this one.

Dd1 (almost 4) has been dry in the day for ages and is dry at night IF I wake her last thing at night for a wee. If I don't wake her she almost invariably does a wee in her bed (she is an extremely heavy sleeper).

Recently she has gone bananas when I wake her, screaming and crying and completely refusing to sit on the loo and try and have a wee. Have tried bribery and nothing works. She just won't. Anyway, I hate this as it is upsetting for all of us (she wakes the baby with her fussing, who then takes forever to get back to sleep).

If I don't wake her, 9 times out of 10 she will wet the bed, then gets very angry that I didn't wake her - grrrr!!!!! Can't win.

Any advice? I think I have to ditch the night time waking as it is making us all stressed...what do you think?

[LIZS]

Will she wear a nappy or is she insistent on not.

If the former I'd be inclined to leave it and wait until she does have the control to stay dry all through - she is still quite young and getting stressed about it won't help anyone. I'm not sure that reward charts etc really work with this unless you know for sure they can do it. Many kids can't manage it at this age.

If the latter could you try a form of damage limitation - Pampers sheets or a washable equivalent to minimise the disruption of an accident. Does she wake when wet ? Also does she still have milk or a drink late at night as this can be a cause in otherwise dry kids.

Personally I would not make this a battle worth fighting if the consequence is a disrupted night's sleep for all of you, especially with a baby to care for too.

[Enid]

She will not wear a nappy. She also won't have care mat under her sheet - she looks and if there is one she gets really upset. I could buy a washable one, that might fool her...can you buy them?

[soothepoo]

Enid, would this do? .

[soothepoo]

The wet bed protection mat, that is...

[soothepoo]

The wet bed protection mat, that is...

[Jimjams]

Enid I've got a washable pad that holds 4 litres. I got it from Shiloh health care- it's better than the standard ones you get from baby magazines. I've also got some incontinence pants from them. We use them during the day, and they wouldn't stop bed clothes etc getting damp, but they would stop them getting flooded iyswim.

You could ring your local incontinence dept and ask them for advice, maybe an alarm or something so she wakes when she wets the bed.

This is the webisite for Shiloh
www.shiloh.co.uk/

If you ring your incontinence dept they will send you a pile of brochures. There's been a similar thread under special needs - it's called "incontinence pants". Lou has posted a link there for some bedwetter pants as well.

[jmg]

I got a terry toweling waterproof sheet from John Lewis which looks just like a normal fitted sheet. I use two - one on top of the other so when DS wets during the night I just whip the top one off - pull of his PJ bottoms and put him straight back into bed. I'm usually back in bed asleep within 5 mins!!!

[SofiaAmes]

John Lewis also do a flannel one that looks just like a fitted sheet.

[Enid]

Thanks everyone for the advice, I will try and get hold of one of these - jmg I particularly like the idea of two on the bed for ease of changing, thanks!

[Maudy]

I quite often used to put a towel/wahsable mat on top of the sheet and a plastic sheet underneath. This had the same effect as jmg's towelling sheet in that you could just whip the top layer off.

If she can't handle the towel on her bed then this might not work.

Good Luck!