Possibly one for Relationships - my DM's spectacularly rubbish reaction to possible baby name

(40 Posts)
NumberOneNumpty Mon 08-Apr-13 18:54:42

So I was chatting to my mother about possible baby names. What do you think, I say, about Jasmine? Thinking there's nothing controversial about Jasmine - flower name, top 20, Minnie as a cute nickname etc. Cue cats-bum face from DM and the exclamation, "Oh no, that's a foreign woggy name". Am so angry I'm tempted to use it just to spite her. By the way, I've asked her numerous times to refrain from making these kind of racist comments around me and she just won't. Aaaaaarrrrrggggghhhhh! That's it, just needed to vent!

funkypigeon Mon 08-Apr-13 19:06:47

Wow. Just wow.

Jasmine is lovely, by the way.

I have similar reactions in my family to my surname let alone my dcs' names. Just smile and say 'thank you so much for your valued opinion'

Then name your baby Jasmine grin

LexyMa Mon 08-Apr-13 19:11:03

I have a great aunt called Elizabeth Jasmine, who is always referred to as Auntie Jappy. Apparently she hated 'Elizabeth' as a child. Funny because a brother of hers and my grandad also didn't like his given name and changed it by deed poll I think.

Anyway. Jasmine is lovely. You could wind your DM up by saying "yes, I've reconsidered and am thinking Yasmina now".

cozyup Mon 08-Apr-13 19:19:15

I love that name, what names did your mum come up with to help you out?

Mashedupbanana Mon 08-Apr-13 19:28:39

Yes, use it to spite her. She'll end up loving it as she will adore your dd and in 6 months won't be able to imagine her called anything else.

MERLYPUSS Mon 08-Apr-13 20:20:47

Use it anyway and tell her Minnie is not 'woggy' it is a nick name for a vagina.

trikken Mon 08-Apr-13 20:24:30

Love Jasmine.

OrangeFootedScrubfowl Mon 08-Apr-13 20:30:16

Call your daughter Mohammed.

Oxtailchambermaid Mon 08-Apr-13 20:40:22

I was dropping my MIL at the station the other day and she used that term 3 times. I totally lost focus and ended up getting a speeding ticket. I suppose a small price to pay for getting rid of her quickly.

I love Jasmine, use it for your original reasons (that you love it, flower name etc) rather than to spite her though!

Wellthen Tue 09-Apr-13 11:34:51

Definitely use it to annoy her. At least as a middle name. I would also google the origins of your own and her first names. Then enlighten her with the fact that they are most likely foreign as well!

DontmindifIdo Tue 09-Apr-13 11:39:18

well first things first refuse to discuss with her any names.

Also next tiem she comes out with a racist comment, I'd actually say, "you do know if you keep coming out with racist comments once this baby's old enough to understand, we're just going to have to keep him or her away from you because I'm not having my child thinking that's anything other than unacceptable. Best you start monitoring what you say now." If she protests, just keep saying "well, DH's mother is perfectly capable of not being racist, so this baby will have one granny in their life."

Honestly, there's no need to be respectful or nice about someone coming out with comments like that. Spell it out to them that it's unacceptable to you and you are the one in charge now you are the parent.

AThingInYourLife Tue 09-Apr-13 11:44:54

I always think of Jasmine as being a bit of a ricey name.

But "woggy"?! shock

Who uses that word?

Wellthen Tue 09-Apr-13 11:48:51

ricey? Seriously?

DontmindifIdo Tue 09-Apr-13 11:59:57

BTW - I think Jasmine is a beautiful name.

AThingInYourLife Tue 09-Apr-13 12:28:25

Yeah, jasmine rice is my main association with the word jasmine.

Ham69 Tue 09-Apr-13 13:38:59

I agree with Don't mind if I do.
I wouldn't describe the remark as 'spectacularly rubbish'. More like ignorant, hurtful, disgusting, vile, etc. I could use many other adjectives.
I wouldn't even be able to repeat it. She has to know how offence her comments are.

everlong Tue 09-Apr-13 14:25:40

woggy name?

What does she say when you ask her not to be racist?

Jasmine is pretty.

Maybe she's been watching Disney's Aladdin?

Lesson learned: don't share names with anyone before introducing the baby.

Ham69 Tue 09-Apr-13 14:42:46

Maybe she's been watching Disney's Aladdin?
Oh, that's ok then sad

Totally not OK!! But earlier posters were wondering why she thought it was 'exotic', and that was an idea I had.

StephaniePowers Tue 09-Apr-13 15:11:37

lol at 'Call your daughter Mohammed'

YES

MERLYPUSS Wed 10-Apr-13 08:33:43

I thought oriental - like Jasmine tea. My friend has a teenager called Jazz. She is a bit gothy and super cool. It suits all ages I think.

honeymoonmum Thu 11-Apr-13 16:32:42

My mum was really rude about me DS name so I told her our next children would be called Anouse and Vagine. That shut her up!

LondonInHighHeeledBoots Thu 11-Apr-13 20:01:49

I second Dontmind's suggestion. Or a simple, 'Fuck off, Mother' next time she comes out with stuff like that - I found that particularly effective with my dad. Call your daughter what you like. It just makes me think of flowers!

gallicgirl Thu 11-Apr-13 20:06:50

Jasmine is lovely. The lesson is, don't discuss baby names with anyone other than your DH.

By the way, where I grew up, woggy is the adjective for carrots and cucumbers when they're past their best and go soft and bendy.

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