Do you have any regrets choosing an unusual name?

(80 Posts)
Cheesegloriouscheese Thu 28-Mar-13 19:38:58

DH and I agreed on a name months ago and now we're close to the big day (C-section is next week!) but I'm starting to have a wobble. Although we love the name it's starting to worry me that others won't, part of me thinks I shouldn't care and part of me thinks we may regret picking something so unusual.

I got a bit of a flaming when I trialled the name on these boards a few months ago so I won't share it, but wondered whether anyone has regretted or opted out of using an unusual name they love?

I'm pretty certain friends and family won't like it but I expect they'd be polite enough not to let on to us. Since we choose the name I haven't been worried about what other people might think but now I'm wondering whether we might regret using something so unusual that many people won't like.

I can't tell if this hormones talking or if we should have a re-think and choose a name that people have at least heard of and are more likely to like. Wow that's a bit of an essay, any advice/comments very welcome.

jellyrolly Thu 28-Mar-13 19:56:10

Well I know some people hate my kids names and some love them but I don't regret either and they really suit my DSs. If you love it then you are more likely to regret not using the name in my opinion.

I've often met people who say they love DS1's name and wish they had used it but went for something more conventional but I've never met anyone who regrets the name they did choose.

farmersdaughter Thu 28-Mar-13 20:30:15

I think people who pick 'brave' names for their children are

farmersdaughter Thu 28-Mar-13 20:36:33

bugger bloody ipad.

What I was going to say was:

I think people who pick 'brave' or unusual names are great, and I wish I was brave enough to go for it. Your child will grow into their name.\

Go for it.

farmersdaughter Thu 28-Mar-13 20:38:29

p.s. tell me the name grin

SummerInSicilia Thu 28-Mar-13 20:48:13

I normally love unusual names, and started a thread on here recently about regretting choosing "safe", traditional names. It does sound as though you're hesitating because you've realised most other people would dislike it though, and as your DC will have it all his life, maybe you should re-think? With an endless variety of names to choose from ,why go with one that you have niggling doubts about? (By the way, was it Grover?)

MsAkimbo Thu 28-Mar-13 20:51:42

Poor Grover! I think Grover is awesome.

I personally wish I picked something a little less traditional. However, I'm married and he wanted a say, the bastard

Chubfuddler Thu 28-Mar-13 20:53:22

My nephew has a "brave" name. I actually laughed when he was born and my brother told me. To his credit he didn't twat me one and now no one in the family thinks it is odd. It's just his name.

Rororowmeboat Thu 28-Mar-13 21:35:16

Go for the unusual name - as long as you like it who cares. Babies grow into their names anyway.

What you forget is when people call DC 'traditional and safe' names lots of people will be inwardly thinking how boring. What I mean is .. other people will always have some comment to make on the name you choose whether unusual or traditional (they just won't tell you once the baby is born) so just go for the name you like, otherwise you'll regret it.

zoetstoffen Thu 28-Mar-13 21:37:24

I have a perennially unusual name (fewer than ten a year registered in E&W each year, and I've never met anyone else with the same name). I never disliked it or wished for a more "usual" name.

I have named my son something similarly unusual and will be naming my second child to match - I find myself drawn to more unusual names, probably because I have enjoyed having one myself.

Passmethecrisps Thu 28-Mar-13 21:37:43

How many adults do you know who don't suit their names? If you love it then he will wear it marvellously.

Please tell us!

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Thu 28-Mar-13 21:40:36

My children have very unusual first names that go wonderfully with our forrin surname.

I am fairly sure that there will be the usual lot who think that a name is not a proper name unless it's an english middle class name used by at least two monarchs and a saint wink but I think sod it. Use the names you love.

I suggest you go with the name that you want. Assuming it's nothing along the lines of TalulaDoesTheHulaFromHawaii grin it'll be fine.

Beatrixpotty Thu 28-Mar-13 21:58:36

I've got 3 boys and we've got progressively "braver" naming each one and actually wish we'd been more adventurous naming DS1 who has a name popular 40+ years ago but actually not v popular now,just outside top 100.Although we've had mixed reactions (mainly from family,friends are too polite)none of their names are weird ,just not that well-used so I don't think they will hate us when they are older!I have a fairly unusual name myself,was the only one in the school and always liked that.

birdofthenorth Thu 28-Mar-13 21:59:42

The vast majority of Mumsnet told me DD's rare name was "awful", "a cow or horse's name" or "a fat lass name". She is now 2.6 and DH and I remain convinced it is the best name in the world, ever. Occasionally I look back on the threads where it was slated just to feel smug that I stood fIrm and followed my gut -it suits her so well.

Should she turn out to hate it we will of course ignore our love of it and support her using a middle or new name!

bigbluebump Thu 28-Mar-13 22:05:18

Please use the name you love! Kids will grow into ANY name and people will associate your lovley child with the name once they meet him/her. Our ds has an unusual name (only used about 15 times last year) and he loves being the only one in his school with it!

Also, we sometimes forget why we name someone - to identify him/her!

ThedementedPenguin Thu 28-Mar-13 22:11:38

Use a name you love. Every one loves and hates different names even ones in top 10.

I called my ds Herbie he is just over 6 months old. I love it and have never met a child called Herbie. So far everyone I've met has loved it bar one person. Well no one else has ever said anything bad about it.

I feel like you need to be prepared for some negative reactions as I think all parents do as everyone has different tastes.

Honestly go for the name you love.

DaveMccave Thu 28-Mar-13 22:51:34

My dd has an unusual name, and I don't regret it for a second. I did get lots of horrified comments when I revealed it while still pregnant, and they scared me sufficiently into changing the equally unusual middle name for something a bit more popular. The middle name has now become much more popular and somewhat chavvy, and I wish she had the original unique middle name. I'm currently 20 weeks pregnant, and refuse to discuss names with anyone but DP. Please don't let posters on name forums put you off.

I've never heard of anyone become later embarrassed about picking an out there name, but loads of people who regret picking something common. Also, I've only met one adult with an unusual name that didnt really like it, every other one loves their different name. I spend ages searching unusual names online and the sites that allow comments often have teens and adults commenting under a name that it is theirs, and they really love it. Again, I've never been glad of my super popular name or know any Louise's/Jennifer's/Sarah's that love theirs. So I think the argument from unusual name haters that 'they'll never forgive you' 'think of the child' 'they'll get bullied' are bull. Kids do have a clue what is normal or unusual, so the playground scare tactic is ridiculous.

DaveMccave Thu 28-Mar-13 22:53:30

Kids don't have a clue even.

seeker Thu 28-Mar-13 23:05:28

Just as a counterbalance, my step nephew refused to go to secondary school til he was allowed to change his "brave, unusual " name to Tom. And his sisters followed suit in their turn. It's not you that has to be brave - it's the person with the name!

lockets Thu 28-Mar-13 23:53:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lockets Thu 28-Mar-13 23:55:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheCatInTheHairnet Fri 29-Mar-13 00:03:24

Be aware though that, what seems original now can change in the blink of the eye. When we named DD, the Registrar commented on what a beautiful name it was and how she had never registered one.

5 years later it exploded in popularity. If I had known the world was about to steal MY name, is have gone for something else. Check the US name charts too as often names that are big in the US boom in the UK later.

MildDrPepperAddiction Fri 29-Mar-13 00:07:58

Both my DCs have unusual names. In fact my MIL said my DD would be bullied because of her name. We ignored her and now she boasts about the wonderful names they have!

You will regret not going with the name you love. Don't let other people opinions bother you.

MrsDimples Fri 29-Mar-13 00:23:37

No.

Don't regret it at all.

Fairly unusual name choice. It pops up on the threads very, very, very occasionally. It's an 'out there', hippy name and combined with the middle name, very unusual.

First name was 25 girls and I think just less boys in the year she was born.

Don't tell anyone the name before the babies born, only utter cunts will say to your face they don't like it, once the baby is born. Obviously, cunts opinions don't matter.

But in real life, hardly anyone as even flinched. Asked to repeat or clarification or spell it, but to my face nothing negative at all. In fact reports back from friends of friends, or old fogeys my Dad knows of how much people like the name. I'm regularly met with 'how beautiful', which I interpret as 'don't know what else the fuck to say'.

I do get asked why, that name, so I either give a brief reason or a half hour lecture on the variousl important, personal and sentimental reasons we chose the name.

Husband was dead set against it when TTC, so in utero baby sent him a book for his birthday written in the cover 'To Daddy Love name '. He soon fell for the name too.

I just wish the whole snobbery, prejudice and victimisation of name would disappear. This forum is rife with it. Children pick that shit up from their parents, like racism and homophobia. It's a name, who gives a fuck. Live with it.

cocolocopoco Fri 29-Mar-13 00:38:26

it's not really about whether you regret it though, it's about whether the kid hates their name.

Which, to be fair, they could do with any name at all, unusual or not, but I do think children especially like to fit in. Then when they're grown up they can decide to be unusual & "out there" or conform to society...

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