ps - howmuchdidyousay - no, I'm really not particularly friendly with this person, our DD's didn't see much of each other but our DSs are quite good friends, so it's not that.

Squishabelle - OUCH!!!

Thanks for all feedback on this. Forehead, you've got it right - I didn't believe DS because I thought he had probably got it wrong! I honestly didn't know that this was what was going to happen!

In the event we had a good day, DS went to remembrance service with cubs then this afternoon we took everyone to the cinema then funfair and fireworks, he came home tired but a lot happier than yesterday.

I just hope he can put it behind him now.

There have been many comments, though, about the perils of parties and sleepovers. My 4 children range in age from 7 to 16, and between them have been to many parties and sleepovers, and of course hosted their own. I have never had a problem with sleepovers (but then haven't yet had one for DS so can only speak for the girls!). However, I can honestly say that this is the first time something like this has ever happened in all that time, so I suppose we're lucky to have got away with it for so long.

The other mother is an absolute arsehole. Hope she gets piles the size of grapefruits for what shes done! Cruel, cruel cruel.

I can't understand adults like this. Even if my boys said they didn't like one child I would never allow them to just exclude one. Very bad form.

I wonder if ,as you and the party mum go back a long way, r her DS is actually very friendly with your DS or it is just one of these things that keep going because the 2 or you are friends.Perhaps he didn't want to invite your DS at all and this is was a compromise ?
Either way you need to just jolly your DS along a bit and distract him with something else nice, rather than letting him brood.

Stupid nasty woman to exclude one child.
Hope your DS is ok

Oh god birthday parties are a minefiled, my DD1 is 8, my best friend has a DD in her class, they live over the road, and the girls spend a lot of time together out of school,as we are friends and help each other out with childcare/pickups drop offs etc!

In school they are not that friendly, my DD1 has branched out and is more friendly I guess with girls she has more in common with, her DD is quieter and I think struggling a bit
Today DD1 is going to a aprty of a boy in their class, best friends DD is not invited
What a trauma Her DD says she is the ONLY one of their little group of girls not invited, my DD says not ans that he has invited all the boys (only4) and about 4 girls she thinks!

I understand how hard it for my best friend, but boy she has made a big deal about it, it is ALL we have talked about this week, she has made such a big deal that I think she is making it worse, she has gone out of her way for her DD to have a "treat" instead, that now my DD thinks she has got the raw deal being invited to the party, I give up and have said I dont want to hear another word!

I agree with Quattrofangs re sleepovers being hell : I hearby, (and henceforward as well) pledge never to have a sleepover because they only cause pain and suffering to all concerned.

YANBU - to a DC it is cruel to be the only one left out. I think you just have to explain that life is unfair and not everyone is as kind as you might hope. IMO the birthday DS should have had one friend stay over-but you have to move on and not dwell on it.

I think so too, Quattrofangs(re mother drawing line)

Have had daughter wanting one at part of the birthday & not the other!

I find sleepovers great for daughters b/day, tbh.

Cheapest, easiest thing we have ever done.

Although she is older, & they more or less look after themselves.