to feel so insecure about the future??

[thisweathersajoke]

Hi,

I am mum to beautiful 13mth old and am 20 weeks pregnant and feel so unsettled.

Got married just 18mths ago and 2 mths later my dh was made redundant (catering manager). I have spent since then applying for loads of jobs for him online, and he was lucky enough to get 2 jobs, both of which he was made redundant from again.
He is now working nights while we continue to to look for another job for him and only just managing to pay the bills with the help of some benefits. I work 18hrs a week but will be finishing for mat soon.

I am just at the stage now when i feel just can;t cope any more. Constantly searching for jobs in an non existent market, trying to reassure him and not blame him (which i know is unreasonable).

But now i have started taking this out on him now. Prob a mix of preg hormones etc, but have said some really awful things to him in the midst of rowing, about why he can;t get a new job etc (he has had approx 50 interviews in the last 18 months), and telling him to 'just sort it'.

I have turned into something I hate and our marriage feels like a pressure cooker of stress, money worries etc (just like the majority of the UK).

Am I overreacting??? We are v lucky he even has a job, but truly we would be better off if he didn't as we would receive more help with rent etc!

I know things could be worse and reading this i realise that i am prob being melodramatic, but AIBU to crave some stability and security for once in our marriage??

[skihorse]

YANBU - there are so many of us struggling to stay afloat right now. It's hard not to worry.