to be freaked out that my friend let my kids play in the road unsupervised?

[babymt]

I've got a thing about roads. They scare the bejesus out of me regarding my kids. I've made sure my kids understand the dangers of roads from a very young age (they are now 2 and 4) and they are never ever allowed on the road or in a carpark without holding hands with an adult.

My friend knows this and that I'm very strict with my road policy. We've had this conversation only a few months back and when we've been at her house and shes let her son play in her road (albeit its a dead end and shes at the end) I've not let mine join in stating it would confuse them if I let them play in what I've taught them to be a dangerous no go area.

So today my dh left the kids with her and her dh for all of 5 mins to come pick me up and when we return they are running around in the road and our friends were watching them from inside (they couldn't totally see coz their parked cars were in the way). I felt totally freaked out. I jumped out of the car and got them off the road and inside straight away. But I didn't say anything to said friends.

AIBU to be so bothered about this? Should I say anything about it or shall I just not leave them with them again?

I'm a bit freaked out that I could've run my own 2 year old over. Shes only 2 and 82cm tall so who would see her if reversing out of their driveway or something?

I would like to point out that said friend lets her 3 year old get out of the car on his own in main roads to get himself to pavement. He recently ran into main road to get a peice of paper he dropped and luckily nothing hit him. Lets him run around in my lane which is very busy and people hare down without looking. He almost got ran over by one of their neighbours etc etc. He consequently doesn't have any road sense at all but they don't seem bothered by it.

[Hassled]

YANB. There is a huge difference is how relaxed different parents are re road safety etc and obviously everyone is entitled to their views. I know I'm way too neurotic, I'm equally sure my friend is way too relaxed - we joke about it, but the truth is we're both probably right. But your friend knew your views and ignored them - I woudl be seriously pissed off.

[ImnotMamaGbutsheLovesMe]

YANBU.

Does your DH know how you feel? Just surprised he left them with her but also that she knows and still went against you.

We all do different things but I would never do something with someone else's child that I wouldn't consider safe for my own to do, nor go and do something they specifically wouldn't want.

[nooOOOoonki]

YANBU - I hate overprotective parenting but that is absolutely dangerous, you wouldn't even see her

[ELR]

i would just not leave them with her again yanbu

[Claire236]

I let my son play in the road outside our house as we live at the end of a cul-de-sac with only 15 houses. I only let him out if I'm outside keeping an eye on him though. If I was looking after someone elses child I wouldn't let them out if I knew the parents wouldn't like it.

[yousaidit]

No, yanbu; we live in terraces and our neighbours own the 'drive' bit of land at the endf of the houses which they let us use for parking: there is literally space to park a few cars behind each other with room for a car to drive past to get in and out of their space. So, its a tight two car width track, and we get knobheads from nearby driving into the drive to reverse back out to turn their car round in the road: not a problem in itself, but they don't slow down from when they are driving along the road, which means they are basically turning into a drive (which is also the footpath access, ie i walk up it with dd's pram!) at 30mph easily (inc some dickwads who insist on driving their farty shitmobiles at about 100mph) there is no way its safe and it's not even a road!!!

[babymt]

I don't think dh would've thought they would've let our kids out in the road hence why he didn't think of it. My first thought when he said he'd left them was "oh god they're probably out in the road"...and surprise surprise they were! He was equally annoyed and freaked out and was shouting at them out the window to get inside.

I'm glad you guys agree. I was a bit worried I was being neurotic regarding it.

I know I'm probably a bit neurotic on the whole road safety thing but its just mine and dh's "thing" and I reckon every parent has one thing they're scared about and mine is my kids being run over.

A girl ran out in front of dh's car (100% not his fault...the mum even rung to apologise) and she was so lucky not to be killed so i think thats made us more strict regarding it. How many kids get run over and survive? Not many I suspect.

Anyway no-ones said if I should say anything or not?

[expatinscotland]

YANBU

[ImnotMamaGbutsheLovesMe]

If you aren't bothered about keeping her as a friend I would let her know how angry you are. If you do want to stay friends then say you were very upset to see the children in the road and you don't want her to do it again. Of course you run the risk she will get pissed off and fall out with you anyway, but perhaps no loss?

[PavlovtheWitchesCat]

YANBU, of course not.

[itgetseasier]

YANBU - agree with your road rules and your friend is to go against them.

[2manychips]

Shocking. Children play in our road a lot, even tiny ones and I have hit one(she was fine) reversing out of my drive, she was so little she was beneath car boot height and I just couldnt see her.There is no need for it they all have lovely big gardens to play in. Def say something.

[tribpot]

YANBU. I live on a cul-de-sac and the neighbours let their kids play outside unsupervised, I won't let ds join them even when he asks as I don't want him to think it's okay.

[MrsGhoulofGhostbourne]

YANBU - a 2 year old should not be unspervised anywhere - let alone a road - you are absolutely right to worry about cars reversing, even in a cul-de-sac

[babymt]

I think I might just ignore it and not leave them with her again. But if for some reason I have to leave them with her I'll say at the time please don't let them out in the road I've put alot of time into teaching them good road sense and I think it will confuse them if you let them play out there.

She'll prob take it as a direct criticism of her letting her own son out there but tough.

They've got a huge garden with kids play things on so why why why do they have to play in the road?!?!?

[Blondeshavemorefun]

YANBU

what on eart was your friend thinking of!!!!

she knows your views and was bang out of order to allow your children to play on road

does she not have a garden (know not all houses/flats do)

think you need to say something - maybe casually say, I was suprised to see XX a out in road playing - i have told them not to play in roads as it is dangerous - please dont let them do it they are here

[babymt]

Ghoul - VERY good point! A 2 year old shouldn't be unsupervised anywhere let alone in a road where anything could happen!

[ChiefAdjusterOfRubensShorts]

This is 14 years old!!! Stop with all the zombie threads FFS!

[Aquamarine1029]

A two year old shouldn't be unsupervised anywhere, never mind a bloody street.

I wouldn't trust them with my children again.

[ChiefWiggumsBoy]

I thought you were going to say your kids are 8 and 10 - at 2 a child doesn’t even really have the capacity to understand danger.

I’d be furious. They wouldn’t be going there again.

(I could just about forgive it if they were toddling about while she sat a few feet away, outside with them. But not while the adults are inside).

[Blondeshavemorefun]

now they are 16&18

tho I gave a good reply 14yrs ago 😂

[ChiefWiggumsBoy]

@Blondeshavemorefun

now they are 16&18

tho I gave a good reply 14yrs ago 😂

Oh FGS! 😂