To expect someone "coming round after work to help me" to do that..!!

[Alderney]

My friend is coming round this evening to help me with some NCT stuff, and give me a wee hand with the kids as my DH is in the states...(and I have a splint on my arm...)

I emailed her earlier this week to say that we have dinner at 6....she finishes at 5 and works about 25 mins away (in the rush hour).

She is still not here.

I'm delaying dinner.

I suspect she is ferrying her feckless and pointless boyfriend all over the county as he has just remembered he has cricket practise (he has this 3 times a week, lives out in the sticks, doesn't drive and refuses public transport)..and she'll be ferrying him their and her kids to her MIL's.

Who knows when she will arrive, and then when she will have to instantly elave to pick up feckless-wonder from said cricket practise...

I love her and she is wodnerful, but I just wish she could do something for herself once in a blue moon (this evening is as much a break for her as it is for me..) without having to pander to an eejit all the time..

[posieflump]

she's probably there by now but how rude!

[Cammelia]

6 minutes late?? I wouldn't even notice that

[posieflump]

ooh didn't notice she is only 6 minutes late!
maybe the traffic was bad tonight

[DirtySexyMummy]

Maybe she thought that since she wouldn't get there til half 5 or later, and you are having dinner at 6, she would come after you had dinner? Say half 6 or 7. Thats what I would have done.

Pointless boyfriend?

[posieflump]

actually you say it is a break for her - from what? Your first sentence doesn't sound much like a break!!

[scottishmummy]

your friend sounds like a star, helping you out,is altruistic.you bellyaching she is late isnt.

[DirtySexyMummy]

Why do you all think she is 6 minutes late? I don't think the friend is having dinner with them, I think Alderney was expecting her to come and go before 6pm.

I might have got this wrong..

[BetteNoire]

She finishes work at 5.
And you posted when she was just 6 minutes late.
As she is coming round to help you with your NCT stuff and your children, I think it is a bit churlish to moan.
Perhaps she doesn't view helping her boyfriend out as pandering to "an eejit", and is doing her best to help out everyone?

[Beeper]

glad I am not your mate. 6 mins and your posting on a web site.

[scottishmummy]

hope your mate didn't have the temerity to got to loo in case she was late.do remember she is doing you a favour

[ellingwoman]

No. She was expected at 5.25 at the latest. They were going to whizz through the NCT stuff and she was going to look after Alderney's dcs while Alderney prepared dinner. Perhaps wash up afterwards, bathe Alderney's dcs and put them to bed. This gives both Alderney and her friend a 'break'

[DirtySexyMummy]

Guys.. I don't think she was 6 minutes late.

I think she was expected to have come and gone by 6pm. At 6.06 she still hadn't even arrived.

BTW - I think you are BVU Alderney. She is coming to help you. Have your dinner later ffs, or earlier.

[colacubes]

oh, bit quick of the mark with the complaining!! She sounds like a wonderful friend and girlfriend, maybe she should be doing more for herself, but you are asking something of her also, so no difference between you and her boyfriend.

I think you explained yourself rather badly, you were referring to her having to ferry boyfriend around rather than her lateness I would hope, but still not your business, cant see what your problem is really.

[colacubes]

Sorry 41 mins late.

[Alderney]

Well, she is a wonderful friend...she offered to come and help me do some NCT stuff because its something that she wants to know how to do.....

So yes, it was very altruistic of her to offer to come and do it....thats like I say, why I love her loads..

However in the end she arrived at 8:30 - I was expecting her at 5:30 - it was clear from our plans earier on in the week that she was coming for dinner - I had made something especially for her that she would like - and she knows my kids have dinner at 6...so while when I posted she was only 6 minutes late, it meant rather than have a "family" dinner I was in a quandry as to what to do - just feed the children, feed them and me and leave hers... etc etc...

So whilst I adore her and I'm very very grateful for her help - she did arrive 3 hours later than I had planned for her to come because of "yet another crisis" that her boyfriend had which meant he was "too upset" to be left alone in their house (he is coming off quire a serious marajuana addiction for the millionth time)....and that meant that we actually didn;t get any of the NCt stuff that we were planning on doing done....

Maybe you don't know what its like to wait around on someone you have planned to see, but to me I find it difficult as I'm on tenterhooks all the time, listening for every care door slamming etc, wondering if its them. My girls also love her and wanted to see her, but had to go to bed before she arrived.

Basically it was a social night for both of us - there would be no "whip cracking, lets get on with this work" - it was a chance for a relax, a chat and a catch up for us, as well as writing some documentation...and we missed out on that because her boyfriend needs all her attention.

[DirtySexyMummy]

Its very annoying when someone posts a thread, everyone replies, and then they post relevant details that really change the whole thing.

I hope you can find the strength to support your friend whilst she helps her boyfriend get over an addiction, I can only assume you have no first hand experience of just how difficult that can be.

[coppertop]

Oh the irony of the first and last sentences of the OP.....

[DirtySexyMummy]

coppertop -

Spot on.

[onebatmother]

I didn't think you were being partic. u even before the explanation.
'king annoying when people don't turn up on time.